- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Blackout
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Click hereMemory
The basis for sentience
Foundation of character
Weaver of id and egos alike
Light
Shed on the mind bright
Showing these memories
As a warehouse of lifetime
Span
Every direction another aisle
Shelves upon shelves all full
In this limitless mindbourne maze
Blackout
One light at a time from the roof
Popping and blinking into dark
Hiding memories in timeless shade
Dim
Pieces lost one by one to dark
As blank blackness creeps further
Consuming every memory it touches
Decay
Effects of blackout begin so clear
Personality alters and warps
With erosion of mental foundation
Hollow
Just a husk with glass eyes blank
And a pointless frown permanent
Wordless staring at alien world
- COMMENTS
I like the movement of this, start to finish, but I agree with 1201, could be pared down.
greenmountaineer
which is what we all have in common, TK U MLJ LV NV
re the structure, only supports so much
cut it back a little, to many, to many words, nice variation the one word as a span between blocks
just my take
This one doesn't feel done to me. The last three stanzas don't follow what I thought was being set up. Maybe I don't understand it.
Illusions in the Cosmic Web of Maya