The Meaning of Life

I don't remember the first time I saw her. Our college campus is small enough everyone has a sense of everyone, even the people they haven't actually met. I do remember the first time I really saw her though. It was late September and the gentle breeze was caressing her as she walked. I swear the breeze was blowing just for her. She closed her eyes and let it nuzzle against her skin, not even minding when the wind lifted up the peplum of her shirt, allowing me to see the small goosebumps on her stomach.

I don't know what happened to me in that moment. The air rushed from my lungs all of a sudden, as if hoping to join in that breeze and get a chance to engulf her. Maybe it was love that made my head spin and my eyes lose focus. Maybe it was fate that twisted my stomach into knots at the sight of her. All I know is from that moment forward all I could think of was her.

I looked for her everywhere I went. I asked people if the knew her, trying to sound casual as my heart hammered through my chest. I knew somewhere in my bones that I needed to make her mine. When I learned her name my mind would repeat it without prompting like some sort of mantra. Grace.

Grace.

Grace.

Thoughts of her consumed my every waking moment. Half formed dreams of her haunted my nights. And yet I had still never spoken a word to her.

That all changed on Halloween weekend. Like any self respecting college student I found myself out at a frat party on a Friday night. I was dressed as a doctor. I knew it was lame and unoriginal, but it was safe and it would keep people from noticing me too much.

Grace, on the other hand, was not worried about being noticed in her costume. It was a skin tight black body suit, with a skeleton painted on in glow in the dark paint, so in the dark it would appear that a set of bones was moving around. In the light though, it was just her. Her delicate curves as highlighted so well all I wanted was to run my hands along them. I couldn't help but stare as she danced with her friends. Me and every other male at the the party that is.

I'm not sure what got into me at that moment. Perhaps it was the suspicious jungle juice the frat was serving, or maybe it was the weeks of unsatisfied cravings I'd had for this girl. Whatever it was, I found myself doing the impossible. I walked over to her and introduced myself. She smiled at me and I thought my heart would stop.

We danced all night and I got her phone number. The next Wednesday I asked her to dinner. We ate Chinese food and she laughed so hard she nearly choked to death. When she found out my birthday was the next week she insisted I go out with her that weekend. I never felt more proud than when I showed up to the club with her on my arm. We danced and drank and soon we were making out on the dance floor. Kissing her was so sweet I couldn't get enough. I pulled her as close as possible. I tangled my hands in her hair, then ran them down her waist, down to her hips, then back. I wanted all of her. I completely forgot we were in a public space. Even if I had remembered I'm sure I wouldn't have cared. All that mattered was her.

The next week we went to the park together. I packed us a picnic. We lay in the grass and stared at the clouds go by. She prattled on about how she didn't care about cliches, she'd always wanted to do this. I told her I wanted to giver her all the things she'd ever wanted. To my surprise a single tear slide from her eyes as she nestled against my chest. I wrapped my arm around her and prayed to anything that was listening that this moment would never end.

The moment did end though. Thanksgiving break was fast approaching. I was going home that Wednesday morning. As excited as I was to see my family, I couldn't bear the thought of leaving Grace. The whole time I was home we communicated constantly. We talked on the phone every night and when I finally flew back I found her waiting for me at the gate. I was so excited I picked her up and spun her around. It felt like a moment in a movie.

That was Sunday. Her roommate didn't have class on Mondays and as such was not coming home until the next afternoon. Grace invited me to spend the night.

That night I had her for the very first time. I finally got to see her perfect small breasts that taunted me beneath every shirt she wore. I loved the feel of cupping them in my hands. I loved biting her rosy nipples and making her yelp in surprise. I finally got to taste between her thighs. I took my time. Gently probing her with my fingers while my tongue felt her clit. When I entered her it felt like we were one person. She was so tight I was terrified I would hurt her as I very gently slid my throbbing member inside. Almost as soon as our bodies connected our rhythms synchronized. Every movement of mine was perfectly echoed by her. Every sound I made, she responded to. Soon my mind went blank. The feeling of her warm wetness was too much to bear. The gentle whimpers she made when I thrust deep into her were all I could hear. I bit her neck and squeezed her breasts, trying to connect with her everywhere I could. All I could think about was the meaning of life. The one thing my life was reduced to, then and forever. The only thing that would ever really matter. My one personal mantra. I kept whispering it as I climaxed inside her.

Grace.

Grace.

Grace.