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Dog Co-Parents

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Extreme methods needed to get a brother over an ex.
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Author's Note: Thanks to LizHaze for proofreading.

*****

There was no answer at the front door. Skye didn't let that stop her. She walked in, scanned each room as she passed it, and found her brother sprawled across his couch in the living room.

Jace was wearing shorts and an oversized hoodie with the hood pulled as far around his face as possible, in spite of being indoors in the middle of summer. The AC running at least made it less of a recipe for dying of heat.

"You couldn't answer the door?" Skye asked.

"Didn't hear it."

"Like fuck you didn't. I knocked loud enough. I know."

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"Oh."

Skye sighed. "You been moping all day?"

Jace shrugged, barely a flick of his shoulders on his otherwise inert frame. "More like all week."

"That seems unlikely. She's only been gone three days."

Jace flinched even at the oblique mention of Hailey. "Is that all?"

"By my count."

"Huh."

"It's not the end of the world, you know."

"I know. Sun keeps coming up. Fucker."

"Just doing its job. Don't blame the sun."

"Why not? It can't hear me."

"It's unproductive, that's why."

Jace snorted. "You think a lack of productivity is my concern right now?"

"No. But it's the first reason that came to mind." Skye swiped her fingers through her hair, pushing it back some. "I mean if you want, go ahead and blame the sun. But honestly, if you're gonna pointlessly seethe and rage at anything, prolly should be Bitch-Face."

"Don't call her that," Jace said automatically.

"Why not? She left. You don't gotta defend her anymore."

"You never liked her."

"I briefly did. Before I knew her."

"Always with the name calling."

"Turned out she was a Bitch-Face though, wasn't she?"

Jace sighed heavily and draped his arm over his face, blocking it out even further from what little light made it into the room through drawn curtains. "Yeah," he mumbled.

"So I'ma call her Bitch-Face if I want."

"Three times is enough."

"For now." Skye climbed up the arm of the couch and perched herself on the back, looking down at her woebegone brother. "Are you gonna make me kick you off the couch?"

"Not making you do anything. And I'd prefer if you didn't."

"Ah, but you are making me do something. You know how many sad texts I've had from you in three fucking days?"

"No."

"Me either. Too many to count. So if I want my phone not to get filled up with misery, I do in fact have to do something about you." Skye put her foot on Jace's hip. "Starting with booting you to the floor if you make me."

Jace groaned and rolled a bit, though didn't actually sit up. "There. I moved."

"Well... it's a start." Skye prodded Jace's ribs with her toe. "Have you eaten today?"

"I think so."

"Worrisome, but we'll circle back to that answer later. Has Calypso eaten today?"

"I left the bag open for her."

"Oh for fuck's sake."

"And the back door open."

"Jace, seriously."

"An' I filled a bucket with water in case she got thirsty."

"That's fucking horrible, dude."

"Why do you think I asked you to come get her?"

"I'm not taking your dog for you, Jace. She's yours."

"She's... she was..."

"She was yours and Hailey's. I know."

"She's sad, Skye. Sad as I am. Yesterday, she didn't even move hardly. Just laid here next to me."

"Yeah, probably because she doesn't know what to do with you either. Dogs get sad when their people get sad, you know."

"Her mom's gone."

"Fuck off. Callie's smart enough not to miss her."

"Now who doesn't understand dogs?"

"Yeah, yeah. I know. Callie wouldn't judge Bitch-Face for being a cunt. But for real, she's moping 'cause you're moping. So stop moping."

"Oh, gee, thanks. I'll just stop. Never occurred to me. So very wise of you."

Skye gave a solid thrust of her legs and toppled Jace to the floor. He swore, and slowly pushed himself to his feet.

"You're a dick," he said.

Skye grinned. "You're lucky I love you enough to care, is more like it. Now come on, where's Callie at?"

Calypso was lying outside, curled in a shady spot on the deck. She lifted an ear at Skye's approach, but then made a grumbling sound and went still again.

"You've spent too much time with Jace," Skye told Calypso.

Calypso said nothing.

"Wanna go for a walk?"

Calypso yawned, making an odd yowling sound in the process, then lay her head right back where it had been.

"Way, way too much time with him." Skye looked over her shoulder. "Jace? Put a fucking t-shirt on. And some sneakers. We're going for a walk."

"Leash is by the door. I'm going for a shower."

"I said 'we'! If you wanted a shower you should have goddamn well taken one earlier."

"I'm not going out."

"You fucking are."

"I'm not."

Skye set her jaw. "Fucking. Are."

****

"See, it's nice out today?" Skye said pleasantly.

Jace grumbled next to her.

"Swear at me all you want," Skye said, tugging gently at the leash in her hand. "It's good for you."

Calypso followed along behind, hardly even stopping to sniff Interesting Things. Jace and Calypso were almost scarily alike today. At least it hadn't been necessary to leash Jace as well to get him out of the house. Only just barely, though.

"I'm gonna get a sunburn," Jace said, somehow still squinting in the sunlight that he should have adjusted to by now. "Then I'll be miserable in a whole new way."

"Well there. Broadened your horizons, at least."

"I'ma whine so hard at you."

"Ya big baby. We won't be out long enough for sunburns."

"You don't know that."

"Look, I know you've been trying to turn into a fungus or whatever, what with the melding into the furniture in a dark environment and all, but a little sunshine and fresh air truly won't kill you."

"Better not. If I die out here thanks to your silly walk, I will haunt the shit out of you."

"I accept your terms." Skye threaded her fingers between Jace's and cheerfully swung their arms back and forth together as they walked. "Besides, Callie needs the walk. Not fair on her holding back on the exercise like that."

"That's why I wanted you to take her. I didn't need to be here for this."

"She's your dog. Not mine."

"I mean, yeah, but... damn, Skye, I'm not ready to be a single dog-parent."

"A what now?"

"You know. Like... when you have kids and then split up-"

"No, I got that, thanks. I'm just flabbergasted that you think you can't handle this. You love Callie."

"I do."

"And she's the sweetest, easiest doggo one could ever hope for."

"True."

"And you're complaining?"

"Not complaining. Just... I feel bad. I haven't hardly been out with her for... well, since Hailey left. Yesterday we spent half the day on the couch together. Just lying there. I don't want that for her."

Skye glanced sidelong at her brother. "But you want that for you?"

"No."

"But you're still doing it?"

"Yes."

"Oh. Ok. Well as long as you're making rational decisions. That's the main thing."

"Don't be an ass. I know perfectly well I'm not being rational." Jace shrugged. "Emotions. What the hell."

"Fair enough."

They kept walking. Calypso picked up the pace a bit, trotting ahead, sniffing poles and garbage cans they passed. Like she was cautiously taking an interest again.

"Hey, ice cream truck," Skye said.

"So it is."

"Let's get ice cream."

"... ok. Sure."

"You're buying."

"I have no money with me."

"You're useless to me!" Skye shook her head. "Fine, I'm buying. You hold Callie."

They only had to wait for a couple of kids in front of them, then they were on their way, each licking their frozen but increasingly melty treats.

"See?" Skye said. "How can life suck when you can literally just go have ice cream every day?"

"I really don't need constant ice cream with my current zero-activity lifestyle."

"We're working on that." Skye nudged Jace. "Admit it. It's good."

Jace nodded. "It is."

"And you're a little happier now."

"I am."

"Good."

Jace licked some more of his ice cream. "Skye?"

"Yeah?"

"I appreciate this."

"You better."

"No, seriously. I'm prolly gonna be grumpy again once the sugar wears off, but thanks for coming over today."

Skye grabbed Jace's tummy and gave it a rub. "You need food, dude. We'll have to get some more in ya."

"That might help."

"Definitely will."

****

"Do you know," said Skye slowly, "that in spite of having plenty of food in your kitchen, you have basically nothing to just... eat."

Jace leaned against the counter. "I picked over all the easy stuff already."

"Like you have one egg left. One. What's even the point of that? And your bread's started going moldy."

"Sounds right."

"There's cereal, but no milk."

"Correct."

"So many cookies, but-"

"Cookies? Where?"

"-but I'm not letting you eat whole bags of cookies. Don't even think about it."

"Aw."

"Canned food. I could just open some of that up and... and do something with it."

"I mean, I guess. How'm I gonna wanna eat a pile of that, though?"

"Well that's the question alright." Skye opened the freezer on the fridge again. "Ok, listen. There are frozen pork chops in here. They'll take some time, but I can cook them, maybe with mushroom soup and rice. You have any onions? No, I imagine you don't."

"Probably not," Jace agreed. "Is that what mushroom soup is for? I was wondering. People don't just eat it, do they? Gotta be for casseroles and whatnot."

"Ok, first of all, there's no reason you couldn't just eat it. It's a soup. That's what they're for. Second of all, why do you have mushroom soup if you've never eaten it?"

Jace shrugged. "Pretty sure I never bought it. Maybe it was Hailey. Maybe it was one of those random-ass canned goods that just appears. Like that can of mixed vegetables. What's even the point of that?"

"In case you want to pretend to be healthy without any real effort. Or flavour."

"Oh. Right. I don't often feel that way."

"No. I suspected you didn't." Skye made a shooing motion. "Go play with Callie or something. I'll be a little while."

"Yeah, I should probably, like, fill her dish properly. And her water bowl. Take down the all-you-can-eat buffet."

"That'd be good."

Jace sighed. "I'm not cut out for this."

"You've had her for, what, a couple years now? You'll be fine."

"Co-parenting, though."

"Owning. Or co-owning. Or whatever. Enough with the parenting shit. I love Callie, but she's a dog, dude. You were even ready to adopt her out an hour ago."

Jace flinched. "Not adopt her out. Just... have someone else look after her. I'm worried, Skye. What if I'm not enough on my own. What if I have more days where I just, like, don't walk her?"

"Then I'll come over and kick your ass off the couch again. Easy."

"Yeah. Ok. Easy."

****

They sat out on the deck to eat. Not so much because it was nice out, but rather because Jace had been sitting out there with Calypso, and she'd refused to remove her head from his lap, even once ear scritchies time was done. Jace made use of a footstool Skye brought for him to set his plate on, and awkwardly ate while disturbing his pupper as little as possible.

"And you think you can't be a doggy daddy," Skye said, an amused smile gracing her lips as she watched Jace twisting his torso in attempt to eat somewhat gracefully.

"You seem to be deliberately ignoring the qualifiers I put on those sentiments."

"I do, don't I?"

Jace pointed his knife at Skye. "See, if you were here all the time, it'd be no sweat."

"Well sure, if I'm here to take you both for walks and feed you and stuff."

"Not even that. Just... just 'cause I need the support sometimes. I need to not have all the responsibility on me."

"It's a rough patch, Jace. It'll fade."

"Hope so." Jace took another bite. "These are seriously good."

"I'll have to try making 'em again sometime when you're not half starved. See if you still think so."

"Anytime. For real."

"We'll see."

Skye eventually finished her plate, only just ahead of Jace despite him having started with more food and a less comfortable position to eat it in. She leaned back in her chair, let her eyelids droop, and waited for Jace to finish as well.

"You have any booze or anything?" she asked. "It's a 'get mildly drunk' kinda afternoon."

"Not that I know of, or I assure you it'd be gone too."

"Figured."

"I honestly probably shouldn't have any in the house for a little while."

"Yeah, that's fair. 'Sides, I'll need to drive myself home sometime."

"You could stay."

"Stay?"

"Just for the night. If you wanted." Jace shrugged. "The place is pretty empty currently."

"I s'pose it kinda is." Skye shook her head. "This better not be a ploy to try getting me to stay permanently."

"Why would it be? We'd drive each other crazy a few days in. We both know that."

"We do."

"Just... for the night. If you wanted. If you don't have anything too pressing tomorrow. Or tonight, even."

Skye chewed on her lip. "Well... I'm definitely getting a bit tipsy, then. So I'll have to make a supply run. What do you want? Beer?"

"Uh..."

"I know, but I'ma only get you, like, two or something. And I might even drink those on you. Not enough to get stupid drunk on even if you wanted to."

Jace shrugged. "Yeah, ok, beer's fine."

"Good. And I'm gonna pick up some milk and stuff. You have any money?"

"Me?"

"They're groceries for your house. And I already subsidized your ice cream."

"Uh... maybe in my wallet. By the front door. If not, I'll have to owe you."

Skye got up and ruffled Jace's hair on the way by. "Yeah you will."

****

Skye and Jace lazed the rest of the day away. Jace nursed a single beer to the point that Skye actually got kind of impatient with him, but she couldn't fault his restraint. She, meanwhile, got quite a bit tipsier than her brother.

Despite the fairly slack day, it was still only mid-evening when Jace stood up, stretched, and yawned.

"I should get to bed."

"Already?"

"Yeah. Callie's ready."

"Callie's always ready for bed."

"Only once it gets dark out."

"Sun's only just barely down."

"I know."

"You're gonna just leave me alone to my drunken stupor?"

"You're not that drunk, sis. But I can take your booze away from you if that would help."

Skye clutched her glass protectively. "Nuh uh."

"Seriously though, I should get to bed. Get up early tomorrow and all that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Skye shrugged. "Ok."

"I really appreciate you coming over today, you know."

"Yeah, no sweat. Coulda warned me it was gonna be an early night, is all."

"I didn't know it would be."

"Sure you didn't."

Jace spread his arms and Skye stood up to meet his hug. Jace pulled her tight, and she squeezed him back with just as much force. They held each other longer than normal, hugging out some of the emotions of the day, and of the past week.

"Hey, Jace?"

"Yeah?"

"You're poking me."

"Yeah. Sorry."

"You gonna let go or what?"

"You haven't let go yet."

"True."

They clung together a while longer, Skye doing her best to ignore her brother's erection. It wasn't a big deal, in some ways. But it was kind of weird coming from him.

"Hard up for female attention, huh?" Skye said. "No pun intended."

Jace cleared his throat and tried to turn so the tent in his pants was less prominent. It didn't really work.

"Sorry. For real. It just... felt nice."

"I'm your sister, dude."

"Not like that. Just the hug. And... and maybe you're right. I haven't had any attention for... over a week anyway. Maybe longer, when I think back. Even before she was gone... she was kinda gone. Y'know?"

"Oof. Rough. You're jerking off though, right?"

Jace flushed. "Well... no."

"No?!"

"Yeah. No."

Skye punched Jace lightly on the shoulder. "You idiot. No wonder it's hitting you so hard with Bitch-Face leaving. Fucking go rub one out. Or a couple."

"You don't think I tried?"

"What d'ya mean 'tried'? Just go do it."

"Not that easy."

"In what world?"

"I know, it sounds stupid. But legitimately, I haven't been able to for a while. Certainly not the past couple days."

"Well... watch some porn?"

"Not interested."

"In anything?"

"No."

Skye put her hand on her head. "Oh good lord, Jace. How bad a shape are you in, anyway?"

"I mean, you saw it. This morning."

"That was this afternoon, dude."

"Well whatever." Jace shrugged. "It's not been good."

"No. It seems not." Skye sighed. "Do you think you can, like, go take care of shit now at least?"

"Maybe."

"Well you got hard from me. Go look up some of that fake sister porn that's all the rage these days."

"First of all, ew. Second of all, you shouldn't tell me to do things like that."

"Why not?"

Jace rolled his eyes. "And besides any of that, it was the physical contact that did it. Porn's not gonna help with that."

"Counter first of all, don't 'ew' me."

"Wasn't. Was ew-ing the suggestion."

"Still, though. And also... what the hell am I gonna do with you?"

"Beats me."

Skye put her hands on her hips and frowned at her brother. His erection was fading, at least.

"You said it was the physical contact?" she said slowly.

"I think so. Just 'cause, and don't take this the wrong way, but it felt really nice just holding you for a minute. And vice versa."

"I'm-"

"Because you're a girl. Not because you're my sister," Jace added hurriedly.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Well, as a girl, I'm about to suggest something very stupid."

"Like what?"

"Bearing in mind it's only because I care about you. And probably because I'm a little drunk."

"Ok. Fine. What's the suggestion?"

"And you can't ever tell anyone I said this, no matter what happens."

"Skye, I get it. Tell me."

Skye stepped closer to Jace, well inside his personal boundary. "I'm gonna have to jerk you off."

Jace stepped back quickly. "The fuck you say?"

"You need to get off, Jace. You need it."

"Yeah, but, not like that. Surely there are prostitutes or something?"

"Do you know how to hire one?"

"... no."

"Me either. And I don't know anyone I could ask that wouldn't just make things more complicated, if they'd even say yes in the first place."

Jace twirled his finger. "This right here, this is things already getting hella complicated."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is."

"Not it's not!"

"Yes. It is."

Skye threw her hands up. "Fine. Whatever. Deal with it yourself."

"I-"

She stabbed a finger at Jace. "But you better go jerk off. Right now. Go."

"That's so weird to hear you say."

"I'm serious! If I'm putting all this work into you, I need you to at least start flushing her out of your system."

"Not sure that's how that works."

"Try it first, then criticize my methods later if it doesn't help."

"That... fine. I'll try it."

"Good boy."

Jace started to say something, then stopped, shook his head, and stalked off. Calypso stood up and stretched, ready to trot after Jace, but Skye caught her collar.

"Whoa there, Callie. Daddy needs some alone time."

Calypso looked unimpressed, but settled for curling up on the couch with Skye for a while.

****

Skye knocked on Jace's door a half hour later. There was no answer, so she knocked again.

"Yeah?"

Skye opened the door and slipped in. "Surprised I managed to sneak away from Callie."

"Why did you need to sneak away?"

"Grown up talk. She doesn't need to hear it."

"She's a dog."

"I know. I just felt weird bringing her, alright?"

Skye stepped closer to the bed. The lights were on, and Jace's naked top half was bared above the covers. His lower half had a blanket across it.

"So, you did it?" Skye asked.

"Don't wanna talk about that stuff."

"We don't have to. As long as you did what you were sent up here to do."



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