For the First Time Ch. 03

"It looks like we may have to go and buy some. Well? Come on then," said Mrs. Lange, as she started walking towards the door.

"But... I don't... I mean... Mrs. Lange..."

"There's no way I'm going to go on my own, Christy. Besides, what wrong with an aunt and her niece going to the supermarket? And stop calling me Mrs. Lange. Jessica is good enough. See? You're making me sound like a grandma now," she said jokingly, "so let's go."

This time around I couldn't really say anything and I just looked down and dragged my feet behind her. My ankles were ready to give in when she held my arm and walked by my side.

"You need to look up and walk straight Missy!" she said with a smile.

And noticing how worried I was, she told me to calm down and said we could take the stairs if I was concerned about bumping into someone on the elevator. I thanked her and told her I needed to get my keys.

"Oh, and get one of those nice handbags you have in there too," she added.

Walking into my room like that was a little weird. I felt like I was on autopilot so I just shove some stuff into the most discreet purse I had, and still in a daze, went back to the living room where I found Mrs. Lange holding the door for me. I inhaled lightly and started walking, closing my eyes as I went past it.

The sound of the door closing behind me made me open them again. I couldn't believe that now I was on the other side of it, but I didn't really have much time to relish on the idea since Mrs. Lange was already on her way to the stairs. I followed her and was incredibly thankful that I'd taken her advice on the low heels. I had a huge grin on my face as I listened to the sound they made.

"Enjoying yourself?" she asked once we were in the car.

"I have to say I am... Jessica," I said awkwardly, which made us laugh a little.

"Good," she said, "off we go then."

The streets were mostly empty as we drove by. All the bars and clubs were not really close to our building and, slowly but surely, I was more and more comfortable with being Christy out here. I felt a bit lightheaded about what was going on but, after a moment, I realized that more than just a thrill, it felt right.

Jessica kept things lively in the car and managed to get me out of my own head a little and enjoy the experience. It took us a long time to get to the supermarket and I had to thank her when I noticed she'd driven us pretty much to the edge of town where I would definitely not run into anyone I knew.

"I just want to make sure you can just be Christy in here, without having to think about anything else," she said kindly.

As we got out of the car I noticed how I arranged my skirt a little and could not really believe what was happening. The reflection that welcomed me as we walked in was one of a young woman with a lovely smile and it took me a second to realize it was me.

We took a shopping cart and I felt as if I was actually gliding through the aisles as we went by. I was so happy and Jessica was quick to notice.

"You have no idea how pretty you look right now. I mean, your whole expression has changed. It's like your a completely different person."

Her words made me even happier and we spent most of our time giggling and joking around. She even told me she'd seen a couple of guys checking me out. I didn't believe her and kept on walking. But for some reason, the though of it made me smile.

Once we got the wine I was ready to go but Jessica told me we may need to get a few more things. Not really knowing what she meant, I just followed her.

It was my first time out as a girl but, I also realized, it was my first time shopping as a girl when our shopping cart began to fill up with all sorts of things. We got everything! From make up to ice cream and I loved going through the clothing section and just picking up things wondering how they would look on me without any kind of paranoia.

We ended up buying some cute underwear and a couple of skirts, and though I had quite some stuff at home, there was nothing like being able to buy these things myself.

I have to say I got nervous whenever we walked past other people but there was hardly anyone and every time it happened I felt less self conscious and more confident about who I was. After getting enough chocolate chip cookies to last us a year, we decided it was a good idea to go.

On our way to the checkout Jessica opened her purse and gave me some money.

"Oh, that's too much. I brought some money with me," I said.

"Don't be silly, Christy. This time it's on me."

I thanked her and promised to get us dinner one of these nights.

Just as everything was going incredibly well it dawned upon me that I was going to be the one dealing with the cashier. When I turned to Jessica, I saw her walking away idly, looking at some magazines.

"Hi, how are you today? My name is Mark. Did you find everything alright?" I heard a voice say.

When I looked at him, he smiled and I couldn't say a word.

"Do you need help with anything?" he asked after a few seconds.

"Oh, no. It's OK," I stuttered back.

That's when I realized I'd just been standing there with a bunch of bills tightly gripped on one hand while my other hand gripped even tighter to my handbag. I looked down completely embarrassed and started to put our things on the counter. I heard him giggle a little and that made it even worse. The only thing that kept me from running away was the truckload of stuff we had but I couldn't wait to leave.

It took me a long, long time to sort our things out and then, I noticed the make up and the facial cream and the body lotion and the underwear and all the other things we picked up and I just wanted to cry.

"You got a lot of things tonight, didn't you?" he said half interested.

"Please... don't be rude," I muttered, still looking down.

I don't know why I said that. After all, he was not really being rude but it was the only thing I could say without bursting into tears.

"I'm so sorry, please, I didn't... I didn't mean to upset you. I was just trying to have a conversation..." he said nervously.

That was the first time I actually looked at his face. He seemed really worried and I started to feel bad about what I said.

"Oh, it's fine. I don't know why I said that. I'm sorry," I said feeling awkward.

He had dark hair and looked a couple of years older than me. And, I thought that expression of concern didn't really suit him and he'd be so much more handsome without it.

"Please, I apologize. I wasn't thinking," he insisted.

"Again, it's OK. I wasn't thinking either." I told him.

There were a few seconds of silence before he continued with his job.

"I'm Mark, by the way."

"Yes, you said that," I told him.

He blushed and I though he looked funny.

"Glad to see I made you smile," he said timidly, "I honestly didn't want to be rude at all. I think I was nervous. I don't usually get pretty girls like you on my shift, you know. I don't know what I was thinking," he continued.

He said a few more things but, by then, I was not really listening. All this time, I'd been worried to death that he'd either known I was a guy or recognized me from somewhere. But it turned out he'd only thought I was this girl that walked in late at night and he just wanted to talk to her. It was such a weigh off my shoulders, and the way he said 'pretty' made it so much better. I was ecstatic!

When I saw Jessica, she was walking towards us and she asked me if we were good to go.

"Yes, just a couple of things and we're done," I told her.

I noticed how Mark had gone silent so, once Jessica was next to me, I introduced them.

"He's been very helpful," I added with a smile.

Once we had all our bags in the cart we said bye to Mark and started to walk away.

"You should come here more often," I heard him say.

I was beaming.