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Journeys end

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Give me tranquil waters
Give me skies of blue,
A quiet place of refuge
To mend a heart so true.
No more for me the food of love
The sweet and heady wine,
For me the only grapes that grow
Are bitter on the vine.
There are no scented flowers
A love that blooms no more,
Their roots lie torn and bleeding
Fom a heart now bruised and sore.
I cannot reach the sunny skies
Nor hear a lovers song,
I'll pack away my trust for good
The journey is too long.

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2 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 17 years ago
From the heart,

It whispers to my heart the grief and sorrow my life has become since I lost my true love-thank you

champagne1982champagne1982almost 17 years ago
I was

Hoping for a sonnet. This is OK, but a pale substitute for the slightly more challenging formula of a sonnet. You have rhythm and rhyme mastered. Why not experiment with different metre and trickier rhyme types? Yes, there are other rhymes out there: near rhyme, sight rhyme, buried rhyme for instance. End rhymes when coupled with steady metre can be boring for the reader and it would be a smart move for you to consider maturing your voice into something more sophisticated.

Thanks for sharing.

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