Thanksgiving with Jack

My mom and dad usually hosted Thanksgiving for all of us every year. They hosted the Christmas parties, New Year's Eve parties, and birthdays. They did a big party for Easter as well. Everyone came. Me, my younger brother Jack, and our cousins and aunts and uncles. We'd been doing it for as long as I can remember. I'm twenty-three now, and Jack is nineteen. He and I are both introverts, but we put up a good façade when it comes to parties with our family. Mom's side, and dad's side.

My train pulled up as I thought about what this holiday would bring. I always looked forward to parties at my mom's house. Not only because there was going to be a lot of food, but a lot of relaxing. I brought my homework along to do at the house, but mom repeatedly said, "This isn't about homework! You have a break! Do your homework in bits every day, and just relax for most of it. Otherwise, it's not really a holiday." She was right about that. I did have a lot of fun.

As I found my seat and showed the conductor my ticket, I smiled happily to myself. That wasn't really why I loved these days. I mean, I did love the food, and the relaxing. I loved spending time with my younger brother as well.

We were both introverts, who liked mostly the same things. He loved reading, and he loved the same types of music I did. He was a big fan of Zen meditation. I didn't really understand it. But we still got along. My mom had been married for twenty-three years, and our family was close. But they didn't know about last year's new Year's Eve party.

I had gotten very drunk on the wine my mom and dad had been sharing with me even after the guests had gone. When I'd gotten to finally go to bed, I had told Jack that I was really happy to be back at home with him. I had told him that I really thought he should have kept the two twin beds rather than buy a single king sized bed. He confessed that he thought I wouldn't want to come back and that's why he had opted to get himself a different bed. I have no idea what happened after that.

We were talking about how it was two minutes to midnight, and wondering if we should go out there and wake mom and dad up. This felt strange. Every year we always stayed up and celebrated the coming of midnight by blowing an air horn or throwing a confetti cannon. This year for some absurd reason, the 'rents had gone to bed early. I went to check to see what was happening in their room, and was shocked to hear them snoring.

"I think it's because they're getting older." Jack said grinning as we both climbed back into bed.

"You all right?" I asked as the clock said eleven fifty-nine.

"Yeah. I'm just kind of sad. I'm a little bummed out that I have no one to spend the moment with. You know, guys always talk about what they do during new year's. About the first kiss, or the hot sex after. Bringing in the first cum of the new year." He mimicked jealously.

There were twenty seconds left.

"It's not really a big deal." I said smartly. "I've never dated, or kissed anyone. I hear it's over rated though." I said as I smiled at him.

We both looked at the clock on his phone as he shined it at us. Five..., four..., three..., two...

I leaned in and pressed my lips on his. He didn't move as I laid there, holding the pose. We both looked at the phone holding that pose until the minute passed, and it was twelve o-one. I pulled away gently and smiled at him.

"Now we can say we've kind of had a first kiss." I said as he put his phone away.

"Yeah." He said in a whisper.

"You all right?" I asked as we laid down and brought the blankets over us.

"Why'd you do it, Eric?" he asked softly. "And more importantly, what makes you think I'm gay?"

"Well, I did it because I'm drunk, and had no idea I was going to do it. You also didn't move away. And I never thought you were gay. I just did it." I said as I laid there blushing.

"Well, I..., I don't know what to say." He muttered softly.

"Are you gay?" I asked as I looked over at him in the moon light.

"I don't know. I thought I was asexual at first, because girls didn't turn me on. But then, I started looking at all kinds of gay porn, and I found out that men turned me on." He said blushing hard.

"I never really liked girls either. I've never really had the time or interest to go looking for porn." I confessed embarrassed.

"Wow. You conservative?" he asked laughing. "Would you marry a girl just because it was expected of you?" he asked hitting a nerve.

"Shut up." I said laughing as well. He had guessed that of me. Wow. I didn't even want to admit it to myself. Or to admit how erect I was because of that kiss.

We'd gone to bed a couple minutes later, without having done anything. It was the worst I've ever felt. I wanted to explore more. But he was my younger brother. I didn't want to pervert this beautiful nineteen year old boy. It was a sin against everything I believed in. So that holiday was me wishing I could jack off to the lip contact I'd had with him.

It hadn't really been a kiss. Just us putting our lips together for a whole minute. No movement, No moaning, no tongue action. I found myself fantasizing about what it would feel like to have tongue action. With my brother. Damn I was so horny all of a sudden! It's like he had opened Pandora's box! Or I had, by instigating the "kiss."

The next time we got together, it was Easter. My parents and the rest of the family had a big party, and Jack and I got stuck talking to all our cousins this time, since they all sought us out. It's like, no matter how much I wanted time alone with him, people always found us. If we snuck off to his room, they'd be suspicious.

Of course, the whole time, I thought about my feelings. Why did I want him alone? Did I want to kiss him again, did I want something more. I didn't know. I hated that I was feeling this way. Especially about poor Jack.

When the party left, my brother and I helped my mom and dad clean up the house. Everyone went to bed at around eleven. It was half an hour into the silence that Jack broached the subject.

"Eric?" he asked softly.

"Huh?" I asked as I looked over at his outline.

"If I close the curtains and make it totally dark in here..., would you make out with me some more?" he asked shyly.

"If you need the darkness, sure. If you want, you don't have to close the curtains." I said as my penis hardened.

"No. I won't do it unless it's dark." He insisted quickly.

He had closed the curtains letting no light in at all. He had placed a towel at the crack under the door, in case someone got up and the hall light came on. After that, he had climbed back into the bed, and we had both turned to face each other.

"Let's not talk." He whispered as he edged closer.

We pressed our lips gently together as we lay there. I wanted to reach out and hug him, but I didn't know if he only wanted our lips to touch. Every once in a while, I swore I felt his tongue brush ever so gently against my lips. There was definitely a lot of tension between us. Both of us wanted to take the forbidden step. Both of us wanted to put our tongue in the other's mouth, but we didn't know how that would make us feel. I was also still denying my obvious attraction to this young man beside me. We managed to just smack our lips together and rub them in different motions for half an hour. His were full, and smooth, and so gentle. I wonder if mine were dry. He never once made an effort to put his tongue in my mouth. And I respected that wish. I just lay there, listening to the sound our lips made every once in a while as we parted and then came back for more.

When the half hour was over, my balls were aching for release. He got up, thanked me, and fixed the bedroom so the moonlight streamed in once more.

I told him he was welcome. I got up, went to the bathroom, and sat on the toilet waiting for the erection to go away.

I had never dated. Masturbation had never interested me. I had never once watched porn. Was I interested now? Maybe. But I didn't want to go for it. I didn't want to become addicted. I mean, I had just kissed my brother for half an hour as if we were middle schoolers. Just lips on lips. No tongues, no spit. And I was already craving more. Even if that's all we did for the rest of my life. Imagine if I jacked off for the first time, or watched porn? Unlike a lot of people say, sex was not one of the things on my mind. I was a top student at the university I went to. I didn't want to ruin that. Not only that, this was incest. I don't know why I encouraged Jack, but I did. I shouldn't. It's incest, and it's wrong.

Now, as I sat on the train, I wondered if my brother was going to ask us to do anything or what. I couldn't get it out of my mind, and secretly found myself wishing my brother asked for more kissing. Maybe he would let us do it in the light this time. Or maybe..., he would let me feel his tongue. Oh man I needed to get my mind off it, or I was going to start to get an erection.

When I got to my destination, I called the house hoping to get a response. It was the day before thanksgiving, and mom and dad were both still at work. Knowing that he might need to pick me up, they had left one of the cars for Jack. Who said he was on his way. Oh my gosh. Why did this thought excite me? I nudged the excitement aside as I dragged my small suitcase out to the parking lot, and waited for him to arrive.

In what felt like no time at all, he was parked not too far away from me. I took my luggage in with me, and we drove off as soon as I put my seat belt on.

We talked about school, and how things were for him. He turned a corner as we both talked about how finals were coming up. Just the thought of finals made my semi-erect penis shrink and hide. I hated finals, and he did too, apparently.

"Funny, I thought a nerd like you would love finals." He joked as we got out of the car and locked it up.

"I am not a nerd." I said as we both made our way into the house. I closed and locked the door, and we both split up. I went to our room to drop off my stuff, and I heard Jack start up the TV.

I went down to the living room, and sat down beside him. He was watching the discovery channel. No, it was TLC. I smiled as I saw what he was watching. It was Monsters Inside Me. He always liked that kind of stuff.

"Hey," he said as we sat across from each other. "Wanna come over to the couch and sit next to me?" he asked grinning shyly at me. "We can..., you know. Make out." He said as he winked at me.

"Jack, we really shouldn't." I said as I stood and practically ran to the seat beside him.

"Don't be a prude. You didn't even masturbate yourself when we made out last time." He said smiling comfortably at me and taking my hand in his.

"You did?" I asked as I blushed and looked at the TV.

"Well, of course I did." He said laughing again. "Mom and dad get home around six. It's three twenty. Let's do something together. You and me." He said as he squeezed my hand reassuringly.

"Should we go up to the bedroom?" I asked softly.

"Nah. Let's hang out down here. TV stays on, no commitments. Just relax, and see where this goes. You don't always have to be a prude about things." He said smiling. "Take off your wind breaker." He added as I took it off and tossed it on the love seat.

"Now what?" I asked softly.

"You've really never looked at a porno?" he asked smirking. "It's usually the older brother teaching the younger one." He said smiling knowingly at me.

"Yeah. I guess I am a prude." I muttered as I blushed.

"Relax, Erick." He said smiling at me.

We both turned to each other, and wrapped our arms around the other. I was holding Jack protectively around the shoulders as he put his head on my left shoulder.

We looked into each other's eyes for quite a long time before we finally kissed. We both let out moans this time, and Jack actually opened his mouth. My tongue searched for his, and oh my God I felt explosions inside me as I kissed him. He devoured my tongue, and our moaning got louder as we sat there. Before I knew it, my little brother was rolling onto me, and straddling my lap. His erect penis was pressing into my stomach as we resumed the kiss. Both of us forgot the show as we smacked our lips together and bit gently at them. We both moaned and sat there, arms around each other hungrily kissing for what felt like hours. This time, I couldn't find any part of me to resist. I wanted this kissing to keep on going for the rest of my life. I wanted him to teach me all the things I was missing by not letting myself explore the realms of pornography and other sexual art. As we sat there, kissing and moaning, I thought about the exchange of juices we must have been doing. I wanted to think about that because maybe it would be the thing that turned me off. I mean after all, this was my brother. But the thought only turned me on more, and I found myself taking my turn and exploring his mouth with my tongue. For once, no matter how hard I tried, I really couldn't find any reason not to keep going with this.

"I love you, Eric." He said softly.

"I love you too, Jack." I said as he pulled away. I leaned in to try and kiss him some more as he still straddled my left leg.

"No, Eric..., I really love you." He said as he looked into my eyes.

"What?" I gasped as my torso filled with heat. It was as if someone had dumped a hot steaming bowl of broth into my stomach and chest. I stared at him.

"I love you." He said as if to try and get an answer from me.

"Oh wow." I gasped. "R-really?" I stuttered.

"Yes. I love you. I don't know if it's going to make you run away, but I love you. I want us to be lovers." He said making me jump.

"Oh wow." I said softly. "Can I think about that?" I asked as I saw his face turn white.

"Sure. It's about ten to six, and mom and dad'll be here any moment. So, you can think about it." he said as he tried to stand up.

"Wait! Wait...," I gasped as I pulled him down.

"Can't we..., you know, do what we were doing until they pull into the drive way?" I asked softly. "I really love the way you feel." I whispered.

He gave me the most beautiful smile, and we began to kiss again.

We instantly resumed moaning and kissing as we sat there. He got comfortable on my lap again, and his erect basket ground into me as we kissed. I tuned everything out except the sounds of our lips smacking and sucking as we sat there. I tuned everything out except the sounds of our combined moaning as we felt the other thrusting tongue on tongue. I loved this feeling, and I loved my arms around this young man's waist. I loved his gentle arms around my shoulders as we moaned into each other's mouths and looked into each other's eyes. Neither of us daring to express what the other felt. How much we wanted to orgasm during this session. We pulled away and stood up when we heard mom and dad pulling in. Jack squeezed my tent, and I let out a loud aaaahh. Then, without warning, he ran into the kitchen to help prepare dinner.

Mom and dad came walking into the house a minute and a half later. I had put myself together, wiped my mouth of any remaining juices, and was now chewing on a stick of gum. I found I had gotten our mixture all over my chin and jaw line. I wonder if that was normal, or we were doing it wrong. I wonder if it was because we were in a frenzy, or we weren't experts at this. I was standing in the middle of the living room changing the channels when they walked in.

We all said hello, and I handed dad the remote as I walked into the kitchen to help Jack and mom. Soon, it was too crowded, so mom and I stayed in the kitchen while Jack set the table.

I tried to will the clock to go faster as we all sat there, eating. I wanted this dinner to be over. I wanted to be alone with my thoughts. He wanted me to be his lover? What if we both met someone else? What if suddenly, we decided this wasn't right for us?

Who am I kidding? What if we were caught? He was my brother for crying out loud! He was my brother, and we had just had the hottest hour and forty minute make out session. I felt a little uncomfortable saying that. Making out. It sounded so, weird. Of course, nerd that I am, I was on my iPhone on a recliner looking up why they call it "making out". Was my brother right? Was I a prude? Was I a nerd or a geek? I sighed quietly as I closed my browser and locked my phone.

"Did you not get enough homework, big brother?" Jack asked in mock sadness. "You bored?" he cooed.

"Leave your brother alone." My mom said from the love seat where she sat with my dad. "He's probably just trying to figure out how to unwind from a long term." She said smiling gently at me.

"Or he's trying to figure out how to make Thanksgiving about learning." My dad said as both men giggled.

"Enough, both of you." Said my mom as she playfully slapped my father's leg.

"Did you have a good dinner, dear?" she asked as she looked over at me.

"Yeah. I love your hamburger helper." I said smiling at her. "Honestly, though, I'm more excited about tomorrow's dinner." I said truthfully.

"We have some news about that." Said my dad as he muted the TV.

"What?" I asked sitting up straight. "Did you kill the family, dad? I told you to wait until after Christmas." I said bitterly.

"No, son." He said laughing. "This Thanksgiving, your mom and I just don't have the urge to host it." he said softly. "After this election, I fear that most of the talk will be centered on that. And since your brother is part of the Hindu community, I don't want to expose him to any hate today." dad said as I looked over at my brother.

"I am a Religious Pluralist." Jack said bitterly. "Not just part of the "Hindu" community." He said making air quotes.

"Well, I tried." Dad muttered looking over at my mom.

"Erick, dear, we just really want to have a quiet thanksgiving. If our Facebook feeds are full of nothing but political shit from our friends and family, I don't want them to bring it into the house." She said bitterly. "Is that okay?" she asked looking a little angry.

"Yes." I said way too excited for what she had told me. "As long as you still make food."

"I'll admit, I'm not going to have to cook as much. But I will make food." She said as she laid her head on dad's shoulder.

"I'm gonna go watch Netflix in my room." I muttered as I got up. "I'm getting tired."

"It's eight in the evening." My dad said puzzled.

"Yeah..., but I also had a long long day today." I said smiling tiredly at my parents. "I've been up since six in the morning."

"I'll probably stay in the den on the computer gaming for a bit." Jack said as he stood. "I'll try not to wake you up if I can when I come in." he said as he headed for the den.

"Have a good night, my boy." My dad said as I walked towards the stairs.

"Thanks." I said tired.

"Sleep well, dear." My mom said as I walked off.

"Thanks you guys." I said distracted as I walked up the stairs and into the first room on the left.

I closed it, and I stripped down. My head was spinning as I walked into the bathroom and brushed my teeth. My mom and dad were well off. The house had three bathrooms. Well, no. It had two bathrooms, and one half. The guest room had a dinky shower stall, and a small sink like the ones in elementary schools. It had a small towel rack, but that was it. The other two bathrooms were in our rooms. The one mom and dad shared, and the one my brother and I shared.

Both rooms were like suites. They had a TV and a big bed. Now that Jack was alone in here, both rooms had a king sized bed. I sighed as I turned on the TV for background noise and started texting my brother.

Our text conversation resumed what we were talking about earlier. How he wanted us to be lovers. I told him everything. About how I didn't know if I was really gay, or if I was just exploring. How I didn't know if either of us was going to meet someone else. He told me he didn't want to pressure me. He wanted us to take it slow this Thanksgiving as far as deep questions were asked. Just do what comes naturally. I could give him my answer when I wanted. I told him I wasn't really tired. I just wanted to get away from everything and sort out my feelings. How I had been thinking about him all year long since Easter, and how I had absolutely loved the session we had had today before mom and dad got home. He told me he had loved it too, and that it just seemed right to blurt out what he had said about us. He apologized profusely, and I told him I didn't think it was bad. I still had some reservations, but I would think about it. I truly would.