All Comments on 'The Relationship Game'
by blkngry
- 83 Comments
Love the story so far! Great concept, realistic character development, and great pacing!
Keep it up!
Well written, damn good premise for a story and fun to read. I look forward to the next instalment!
That was quality! Looking forward to see more interactions and hot sex. Maybe even a harem starting. Keep up the good work!
P.s. I'd like to see "Alan's Thoughts" continuing if you have the time.. It's one of my favourites
Really like the idea. Also your writing style is really fluid and good to read. Would love to read a second chapter
What a cool App. Now if it was only real. Great start. Hope you continue on and on and...…….
I like your spin on the premise of the "relationship mod app" genre of erotica. Much more enjoyable with the whole limited uses per day rather than just a point and shoot you're mine now, all slider's set to max. Love the random xp bonuses and rpg elements. Keep it up. I see this getting to be real amusing and super sexy.
Great concept and loved the read, but disappointed theres no follow up from the Camerawork piece you did!
Really great read. Would prefer if the changes seemed more organic to the person they were applied to but interesting concept. I'd like to see more options unlock as he levels up and more use for the random button. Now that he knows it can turn someone into your mortal enemy why would he risk that without a major benefit?
Great idea and well written. I feel the sex could be hotter though. More descriptive and not wham bam thank you.
This is really good stuff. Love the detailed premise, and super hot scenarios. Keep writing!
i would really apreciate it, if you would pursuit this storyline
as it is one of a kind
I liked your Alans series and now this one, a lot of potential, well written. Would love to see the story and characters develope!
I love the Alan series and was worried that you would stop writing it. Hope you keep adding towards that series. Loved the last chapter Brother vs. Brother
Then I see this one and I am happily surprised it amazing. Truly magnificent
Loved it, will check the Alan stories mentioned in the other comments
Please do more of this!!! It's SOOOOOO good!
It was a new premise and it has a lot of potential going forward. Thank you.
My first taste of your writing, and I have to say, I'm hooked!
Loved this story and I can't wait to see where it goes. In the mean time, i'll go read your other stuff.
Keep up the good work!
Thanks for all the kind words. Life got busy, and this was my first story in a while, so I'm glad some of you were able to enjoy it. I do plan for it to continue, and for those asking, yes, Alan's Thoughts will also continue, and hopefully return a bit to form.
Keep reading and commenting! I enjoy the feedback.
I've been missing Alan's Thoughts, but this is a great new series! I don't care which one you decide to continue as they are both doing so well, though I do agree that Alan's life has gone a little off the deep end.
Great, great, GREAT writing!
Good timing, plenty of details. And the main character is just human!
Keep the excellent work!
I really enjoyed reading this. As much as everyone can get to love the whole omnipotence that many main characters end up having it is nice for their to be limits on the power and for the character to be rather human.
Honestly best peice of mind control erotica I’ve read on this site. Absolutely can not wait for a sequel. Hoping he gets to fuck his ex and maybe a sexy milf!
I love the idea and you executed it very well. I am really liking this story and I hope you keep at it.
Hi, I’m really excited about the story. Original and very well done. I don’t know if you want this kind of feedback but I am throwing it out there anyway. I’ll try to write it as questions when I can.
Who made the app?
Is there going to be a hidden antagonist behind the scenes trying to mess with Scott?
Does anyone else have this app and what would happen if Scott and the other person crossed paths? Regardless if it’s another guy or girl, would they be in competition with each other? If it is a girl and they both hook up together, will their “plays” on their app interfere or something with their hookup? There is some real potential drama there anyway you write it.
Can Scott buy bonus packs or something like with normal apps? And what would he us for currency that do that? Would he have to trade levels or something? What would those packs give him?
What happens if Scott were to fail a mission? He’ll get negative points but is there any other consequences? He came close but was able to turn it around. He won’t be so lucky all the time. So does the app only affect the other person or will something change about Scott?
What would happen if Scott stopped using the app? Will it disappear off his phone? What happens if he finishes the game? What are the rules of the game and the goals? What are the challenges of the game? Are there any minions/bosses to fight? Or is it all open world game play? In which case is it mmorpg? Which leads back to what happens when two or more players cross paths.
Anyway, here’s some stuff to think about when writing the next part. Pick and choose what you want and I hope to read the next chapter soon.
Dan
Because the exchange apparently didn't last for more than a day, does that mean the stalker-ish girl with which he swapped the stats with the sexy neighbor is back to normal again? I mean he added some stats to what is basically the stalker girl's, so shouldn't there be a change?
I'm hoping it wouldn't end with her just being used as a stat exchange, there's a lot of possibilities...
In any case, I've been a fan of your works, can't wait for more!
Really enjoyed this and looking forward to a continuation of it.
Such a novel concept, one that would be fun to follow. Character isn’t full sadist either which happens a lot with reality control stories. Please make a second
Maybe I should check on that...for a friend. :-)
I’ve read everything you’ve published and I enjoyed this one by far the most! Love this premise and the possibilities. Please, please continue this one. Well done!
This is one of the best setups for a long-running series that I've seen on this site, ever. Please keep it going... or to quote Erika from your own story, "DON'T YOU DARE STOP! I'll [you know the rest] if you stop!"
I would love to see more. You might also consider throwing it up on CHYOA too. I'm sure there would be interest.
Great set-up, interesting idea. Looking forward to more of this.
Really hope you continue this! Unique idea with a super interesting set up and an excellent writing style.
This was one of the best/most original stories I've read. If you could write more of it I'd be eternally grateful.
Interesting story, would really like to read a sequel!
From beginning to end, totally drawn in. Neat concept, quickly established characters, fun premise that makes you imagine the unlimited possibilities for the future. Extremely well done. Really terrific, smart writing.
This is one of the best new stories I've read in a long time, I check frequently for more
Hey there,
This was the best stories I read in a long while. Is there any whance that you'll follow up?
Your characters are likable and have a soul, abd you definitely have a good writing style :)
Hope to read more soon :)
Was super into this story, front to back. After I finished I hopped over to your profile and was sooo sad to see this is the only installment in the series. I know some other folks are already saying this, but just wanted to add my voice to the chorus of peeps saying they hope you'll write more.
I really enjoyed this story. The characters, although introduced and brief, were lifelike in their reactions. The system is entertaining and interesting, with many unexplored possibilities. I like how it is truly relatable to a game system, and is intriguing on how you would develop it next. Please continue!
Best story I've read in a long time. This is like Master PC but better.
This is the best thing ive read in some time. Please continue with this story thread. Your ideas are fresh and the writing is quality. Bravo.
I had already read your others stories photoshop omega and alan thoughts when they were just being written and were by far the stories that I had liked the best at the time, and just recently I remembered your stories but didn't remember who had written then, so I just searched in the google "omega photoshop literotica" and found you to see if there was anything new and just found out this story and I really loved it, I don't know what happened to your life but I hope that if you still remembers it to continue writing your stories, you have a fan right here. =)
This is a really good premise for a story series. The writing's realistic and so good that, pulling some of the more explicit sex, you could publish a longer version in a SF monthly.
Please write more!
Please please please please write more of this. I have never needed something more in my whole life!
This plot is clever as fuck. You have to continue it!! Great writing
What a hot story - with plenty of lose ends for a sequel (what does Angela think of him today - and does it catch him by surprise?).
Excellent story, very good writing, and definitely needs about ten more sequels. It would be nice if there were more permanent options on the app, like making Ericka a permanent girlfriend, and maybe a little more control over what happens. This was a great story, and I think pretty much everyone is hoping for sequels.
Do you plan to ever continue this story? I came across it again today, once having read it when it was first published. It's a great concept and I'd love to follow the story.
Such a neat and original concept! Your writing is amazing. Please make more!
What a great story concept, well thought out and developed, with some great sex scenes. Looking forward to more!
This story is really great and could honestly spawn a trend like Master PC. I'd love to see more from you and more writers use the idea with your blessing. The concept is phenomenal and there's so much to be done with it.
What a fantastic concept! I've wanted to see an RPG real-life style thing in here, and this wasn't exactly what I expected but it's incredible and I think it's what I needed rather than what I wanted. Immediately going to read more!
Humour, well done gamification, and decent sex scenes. This is great. Other readers who enjoyed this might also enjoy "My Pickup Artist System".
Ah man, this was so much fun, I wish there were more than two chapters! Too bad.
Very unique, well written, highly descriptive, clever and well thought out, actually loved it and hope it doesn't end here, looking forward to more of the Game!