I live on a farm in the middle of nowhere. Mother of three, two boys who are all grown up and out in the world, and one girl who's also all grown up but who is planted firmly in my back forty.
I'm in a relationship with a wonderful young woman; she doesn't care what I do here, but I have become excessively picky about my dance partners.
Since some of y'all were obviously raised in barns, let me just give y'all some quick advice on how to interact with a lady. I'm sorry, I didn't want to be a bitch, but my inbox is getting full of messages from people who ought to know better.
Rule 1: complete sentences. I like to write and I'm not very good at it, so I get not being perfect. All I ask from you is proof that you can throw a couple of words together more-or-less the way they're supposed to go. I might still not reply, but a complete sentence gets my attention faster than "hi" or "sup" or any phrase that contains the word "hung".
Rule 1a: Yes, I understand that "Hi." can be a complete sentence. Fuck off.
Rule 2: If you send me an unsolicited porn video link, you go on my blacklist. Do not pass Go, do not collect $200.
Rule 3: I will probably take my time getting around to you. I have a lot of messages to wade through, and I'm going to look at your profile before I say anything, and I'm probably talking to a couple of other people or working on my next writing project. You get pushy with me, sugar, and you're getting ignored that much harder.
Rule 4: I swear to god, if one more person pops into my DMs with nothing more than "how old is your daughter", I may just lose my ever-lovin' mind.
Rule 5: I will not in any way risk my real life getting tangled up in my lit life. I will not voice, text, kik, skype, discord, send pictures, or anything else that could bite my ass in a bad way down the road.
Rule 6: Know what you want when you talk to me, and be direct. I won't read your mind, I don't take hints or follow cues well. If I'm not certain what you're looking for, I could just spend all night making small talk.
I make decisions on who I talk to and when based on the stars and the direction of the wind. I do not have a preference for gender or sexuality; I am solidly in the middle on all that. If I like you, I like you.
On the off chance I respond to you, know that I love to roleplay and I love to chat dirty. I'm here for the stress relief and the fantasy.
There! Now, if you've gotten through all that and are fine with a 90% chance I won't reply to your PM, feel free to talk to me in chat!
Gender
Female