- Erotic Poetry
- life is a private party
Note: You can change font size, font face, and turn on dark mode by clicking the "A" icon tab in the Story Info Box.
You can temporarily switch back to a Classic Literotica® experience during our ongoing public Beta testing. Please consider leaving feedback on issues you experience or suggest improvements.
Click hereme?
no tv
here
first time
in this bar
beer
and in
the mirror
a young woman
good looking sharp cheerful
black pants black blouse
a guard
she guards
a walk-in closet
in the wall behind me
this might be my only time
in this bar which caught my eye
in the past months
a bar that belongs
to oriental movies
which mix kung fu with money
the coming visitors don't enter
the huge dark room on my right
for which i didn't care myself
i meet enough drunkards
outdoors
instead
the oh so elegant guests vanish
in the closet
the young woman
frisks them
fast
armpits inner thighs ankles
some New Saigon it seems
and on my way
out i ask
it's a private party
she says
but of course
Wlodzimierz Holsztynski ©
1995-10-03
- COMMENTS
i love your use of sparse language, you make it sound FULL and the images i conjure up because of your writing, are vivid. this is a poem i can read many times (as i have already) and gain enjoyment each time. i like how you have used white space. i am learning to like the lack of punctuation, it seems to open the boundaries for reading. i am intrigued by the last few lines as to who is saying what. the tone changes with the two different approaches and i can't decide whether i like his slight cynical tone or her 'down the nose' tone. excellent reading, thank you. you've taught me many things in this one poem.
original and unique, I did enjoy your write, if you need help fixing your signature, let me know...thanks ..Art