- First Time
- Chemistry
- Page 2
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Click here"Ready?" He whispered, and kissed me.
"Oh yes," I breathed back, still holding onto him.
We worked together then, he pulled out and I backed away at the same pace. We were perfectly in synch as he came deep into me, filling me up, and then came back out again. We kept a steady pace, and I never wanted this to end. I hoped that, as long as we went slowly, he wouldn't come. I wanted him to keep going forever. It was at this point that a new feeling came over me. I was already deeply aroused by the pain of it all, but now a different kind of pleasure came over me. I hoped that meant Ryan was hitting my G-spot, though I had never experienced this type of orgasm before. I didn't know what to expect, but as he kept thrusting deep within me, I became more aware that he was stimulating me to the core. I held onto him tighter and threatened to speed up our rhythm.
"Oh god," I moaned quietly. He took that as his cue that he was hitting the right spot, and continued. I loved the expression on his face; he was so intense and so focused on me. I could tell he wanted my first time to be something I would never, ever regret. My pleasure continued to increase, and I was scared I would do something to mess it up. Not knowing how to handle myself, I kept thrusting with him, enjoying the pain and the impending pressure of my orgasm. I sped things up even more—not consciously, but as a natural reaction.
"Oh god, come on baby..." I groaned.
"You like that?" He pushed harder into me.
"Oh yes... Yes..." I could barely see straight I liked it so much. "Don't stop."
"Don't worry," he laughed. I decided this was the best feeling in the world, and I pushed him faster. Our hips were almost meeting now, but I wanted him deeper inside me.
"Harder," I prompted. He sped up, but I still wanted more. "Harder... come on, harder, baby... harder..." He added a slight hitch in his rhythm, and I could tell he was trying to go deeper. It still wasn't enough for me—he was making love to me. I wanted him to fuck my brains out.
"Fuck me," I whispered, wondering what that would mean to him. He thrusted faster and farther into me, and now I could see in his eyes that he wanted exactly what I was asking for. "Fuck me, Ryan," I begged him with my voice and my body. This pleasure I had never experienced before was increasing steadily, but had now leveled off. "Fuck me," I commanded.
"Oh yes..." He was closing his eyes and thrusting harder. His balls had begun to slap lightly against me, and our hips were so close to meeting every time he entered me. "Ohh..."
"Fuck me... Fuck me... Fuck me!" I was shouting now, and I wanted to throw him back on the bed and have my way with him, but since it was my first time I thought it better to let him be in control.
The scarlet returned to Ryan's cheeks, and before I knew what had happened, he had pulled out of me and thrown me down hard onto his bed. My breasts bounced as he did so, and he forcefully pulled my legs up to rest on his shoulders. He ravaged me then, and all gentleness was gone. He threw his cock into me.
"OH, Ryan! YES!" I yelled now, not conscious of how loud I was being. He held onto my legs, then leaned into me as he pounded me as hard as he could. I could feel his balls slapping against me, and I could feel that his cock penetrated me as deep as my body would allow him to. He thrusted all the way down to the base of his cock, and was going as fast as he could. In the meantime, I felt something amazing building up inside me—a pleasure I had never experienced before. It continued to grow and intensify, and I begged Ryan to keep going.
"Harder, baby! Harder! Oh god, I'm gonna come..." My eyes were locked on his and I couldn't stop myself from yelling even louder. "Fuck me! Oh, fuck me! Yes!!!"
I was on the brink of my orgasm, and I sensed that Ryan could not take much more. I screamed at him once more to fuck me, and he kept going even though I could see it was a struggle for him to hang on. At last my orgasm came to me, and I felt something I had never felt before—I had come again, but it was much more intense than it was last time. It was so powerful that I almost blacked out; I had to close my eyes and remind myself to breathe as my entire body shook violently with pleasure.
When he saw that I had finally come, he spread my legs apart and leaned down close to me, and then came into me as well. I could feel him inside of me, shooting his cum hard into me.
"OH YES..." he grunted hard. "OH GOD, YES... YES!" I was trembling and weak from my orgasm, and feeling him cum hard into me was amazing and new all at once. I was surprised by how much there seemed to be; he filled me up to the brim and I thought it was going to leak out because there was so much. I felt so dirty, so hot—I loved every second of it.
Finally, he collapsed onto me. Neither of us could speak because we were breathing so hard. The sheets on his bed were damp with sweat and we were both soaked. He was still inside of me, and I wrapped my arms around him and held him on top of me. I could feel him go soft inside of me, but neither of us moved. He lay on top of me, whispering sweet nothings into my ear while we both caught our breath. Eventually he rolled off of me, pulled a dry blanket over both of us, and I curled up in his arms again.
"I promise I'll let you sleep this time," he murmured, and kissed my forehead. I would have answered, but I was already drifting off to sleep in his arms.
- COMMENTS
Wow, this story is definitely one of the best I've read in a long time. It was so real and loving.
I agree that the general tone of your piece exponentially builds suspense and intensity very well with each passing paragraph. However, here are some thoughts to consider.
I enjoyed your prelude to the actual sexual encounter, taking time to really build the characters in a vivid setting. It presents a captivating introduction that lets your reader connect. But when you start into the sex itself, the pace of information, description, and development hits a bit of a hitch. Really take your time to slow down the writing process of the sex scenes, yet using powerful and engaging words (as well as descriptive imagery) to keep the desired level of hot and heavy action afloat. Give more insight into what was happening right in front of you; what it looked liked, sounded like, tasted like, felt like, etc.
Point in case, your transition of sexual positions (my legs hiked up and over his shoulders) needed to be explored further. What did the change do for you? How did it feel compared to everything up until that very point? And although I've only mentioned "how do YOU feel", be sure to give your other very important character some face time. Answer the same questions posed through the 3rd person perspective, offering an even more complex view of the sex you're having.
Lastly, reread your dialog aloud after you're finished writing. You may find that somethings, while technically correct and plausible, may not sound as natural in particular settings. Saying "fuck me" five times in a row WHILE supported with narration in context is well and all, but there is more (naughty and sensual) conversation to be had.
Phew! It looks like I'm picking on you, but I really did enjoy your piece and the style in which you approached it. I just want to help you hone in on the big picture by tweaking the smaller details. Great writing, and keep it coming! (no pun intended :)
-my signature is anonymous as I have forgotten my ID, but I'm pretty sure I'm Weston102-
The story itself is quite short and the pacing is very fast. But it didn't feel rushed or unnatural. It was very enjoyable to read :)
This is one of the best first time stories I've read. These two lovers really do have a great chemistry between them. Your description of the teasing, the tension, and the juicy sex scene really put it over the top, so to speak. I'd give it a "10" if I could.
that was the best story ive read on here. that really tops it. please. i beg u tell more of these.
Best on the site!! WRITE MORE! Your by far the best author on the site! GOOD JOB!!!
I don't think there are many first times that are that good. I'm glad yours was, though, and I'm glad you shared it with us. Thanks for a hot read.
I thought this was the best first time story I have ever read on this site. You have a lot of promise for future stories. The only thing i would say is work onthe ending a little more as it does seem as little abrupt.
everyone's first time should be like that. that was so fucking sexy makes me think of making a phone call...
I looove this story. I think that I may have read it around 10 times, it is so realistic and reminds me much of my first time. please write more stories you are a great author!!!
I thought this story was great. I really loved Ryan's character and the way he cared about how she was feeling, etc. I thought that this story was great! I'd love to read more written by you, I REALLY enjoyed it.
good story... i could have used some setup on appearence (sp?) nothing too descriptive though because I know that at least I find it enjoyable to imagine. i reccomend not using the same characters ever again... they were good as is.
I loved this story... the setup and the conversations all felt very realistic, but the sex scene and the end both felt very abrupt... Did you get tired of writing the story or something? I thought it went from a realistic pace to an unrealistic one very suddenly... Still one of my favorites on this site thought...
I realized I had already read this. Can't say I'm disappointed though, just as good the second time around.
Well written, and quite erotic. The inner conflict was interesting and the fact that Ryan didn't have a monster piece was refreshing. I'd love to hear more.
The sex part was good. Who were the characters and did htey have another life?
After reading that I am a fan. Characters were great, the story was awesome, I really liked it. Now to see if you have more.
This little lady is going to be a VERY Nasty tease when she has more experience. She's off to a great start & probably looking for something bigger to play with as we speak. Is a Babysitter senario in the offing?
I can't say any more. You captured exquisitely what it is like for a girl to decide that yes, this is the one I want to lose it with. Can't say I orgasmed like that - whew! - but I do remember the inner conflict, tho it was oooooh so looonng ago! Keep writing, girl!
Your story is well-written for this genre. You strike a nice blend of romance and erotica; I love how you show respect for women yet reveal their inner, more primal desire to get "naughty." Keep up the superb work!
A 5 does not do justice to this story. On scale of 1 to 5, must be at least an 8. Keep it up (no pun intended). Look forward to more.
An amazing short story. Very erotic and sexy while not being too short handed in the leadings up to the act. Hope to see more of your work on this site. I truly hope that you continue to write as your style and grace are amazing.
This message is coming from someone who loves to read erotic stories, and I must say that this latest, brings in the meaning for ::pant pant:: Wow, damn wonderful! Very creative in the innocence and describing the how to's and why for's. Very beautiful, hope to read more from you.
This story has the WOW factor. Everyone should read it. I hope to see it shortly at the top of the list.
It took nearly 5 minutes for me to return to normal breathing. I have never read a story with so much raw, but innocent eroticism. I guess it takes a woman to write that kind of story. I hope there are more like this. Thanks
How erotic can you be? I am just now softening down. Did I tell you I love erotic stories by women? I do, and this is tops. A very complete short story, well written and cetainly very exciting.
Thank You for excellent writing,
Rudy