Love, Unconventionally

"Wow."

It was all I could say. I still wasn't letting go and somehow, I knew Piper didn't mind.

"That was incredible, Oliver." Piper leaned further into me and gave a peck on the lips. "What a wonderful benefit to our friendship."

Even after everything we just experienced, that was what we were? I couldn't control the shiver down my spine no more than I could control the single tear that cascaded my cheek. But I still couldn't let go.

*

And my summer was full of benefits. Every chance Piper and I had, we shared in those benefits. After her work. After Lamaze class. After my studying. Before one of our dates. After one of our dates. During one of our dates. The benefits were amazing. And it took all I had to not question her about our friendship – to not lose what I had. I buried my feelings in honor of what Piper wanted. It was both heaven and hell.

*

It all came to a head the day before college. It started out as a simple comment from my Dad, the great G –Daddy.

"Don't break too many hearts."

It was his joking manner and he meant nothing by it. I knew that. The problem was Piper.

"Don't worry Mr. G; Oliver is very capable of loving someone - and if something were to happen, I'm sure it wouldn't be because of him."

It could have been just an estranged, warped part of my mind, but to me, Piper just admitted that she knew of my feelings for her. She was intentionally being dismissive. She was playing me.

I stormed to my room and slammed the door. I threw my suitcase onto the bed - I needed to pack anyway – and started tossing clothes into it. I ripped out a dresser drawer and dumped it.

"Oliver?"

It was Piper. Her voice was meek and scared.

Well if she wanted to be dismissive, so could I. "Go away."

The door opened anyway. I barely registered her tears. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything this summer because it hurt you."

Sorry? And that's when I lost it. "So you knew! You knew how I felt – you know that I love you and you keep pushing me away with this "just friends" crap!"

"Yes," Piper sat onto my bed, her gaze fixated onto the floor, "And I'm sorry. I'm sorry you got hurt, but I can't regret what I will cherish forever."

"What?" I exasperated. "How can you say that?"

"Because I love you, too!" Piper collapsed onto my mattress, her face buried in her hands.

I was speechless. She knew how I felt and she felt the same way. Was it meant to be a game? I took a couple deep breaths. No. Piper wasn't playing a game. But...

I sat on the bed; my hand found a home on her back and began a gentle, soothing rub. My feelings came down to just one simple word, "Why?" I was nervous of the answer.

Piper shifted her head so she could see me. She was staring directly at my thigh, but that didn't matter. "I love you, Oliver. I have since the first day you found me in Mrs. Dyer's class. You are the nicest, most caring, sweetest guy I have ever known. And even after you found out of my situation, you still showed compassion. How could I not fall for you?" Piper wiped away a tear as she sniffled, "But how could I possibly burden you with my problem? You, the man I love, whose future is in chemical engineering; how could I possibly burden you with a child that isn't yours? I wouldn't... I couldn't do that to you."

"I love you, Piper." I leaned down and kissed her. Despite what was going on, it still felt amazing. "How about this?" I smiled as I gazed into the love of my life's eyes. "I don't take my room at State University..."

"But," Piper pleaded.

"Now let me finish," I held up my hand. "Instead, I'll commute; State University isn't that far. I'll get a part time job around here instead of working at the library and we'll manage until I graduate and get a kick ass job. Everybody will be satisfied. I'm going to school like my parents want and we can be together, happy. And that's what Mom said was important anyway; right Mom? We can do this. We can do this together."

I heard an audible sigh from my doorway. It wasn't disgruntled. It was more of a sigh of predetermined knowledge. And I didn't have to look over to know that my parents looked at each other to silently discuss what I just said. That was a given.

"Well, I guess I can finally get my man cave back if they're going to share a room."

"Not so fast, G – Daddy," Mom snickered. "That's now the baby's room."

Dad snapped his fingers, "Well, in four years then..."

I stared at Piper and I suddenly knew what she was thinking. Just like my parents... I leaned down to quench her thoughts by placing a loving, tender kiss upon her lips.

And I knew we were not just going to survive life, but excel at it because we had each other.