All Comments on 'My First Love'

Not a bad story,

The spelling mistakes are so distracting however.

There are plenty of people here that would be willing to proof read your work.

Decent story line but you could use an editor. Also spell checker. Not bad just sounds like it was thrown together and not re-read for minor errors. Needs a bit of build up, lead in to the scene(s). I'm usually not critical like this but it just kind of hit me. Keep working on stories though,

They need to ignore social taboos. Starting a family should be in order

Get an editor, or at least proofread, cause you clearly need one.

It was not a bad story, but so many mistakes...only 3 Stars!

There is a lot of good-to-great in this story.

... but one or two real problems.

Your opening paragraph implies, states, "why more never happened is still a mystery to me," and that she was your first love, not that she is still your current love, or whatever.

You really need to clear this up. At the end, all you give the reader is some sort of relationship that is not really updated or made permanent, and "BEACH HOUSE." You really should explicitly undo "more never happened" with involving stuff about their relationship as it went forward, or even, "You know what else is still here after 30 years, just like that electronics company? The love of my life, in my arms."

This was a really good start. I will not rank it, because I do not want to bring your rating down. This story deserves a little more work.

Give this young man a splash of sexy chest hair, so when his sisters breasts crush against his chest BOTH he and she can be turned on -- her by the caress of his chest hair, and him by the gentle rubbing of her nipples. Good story, and good writing! Glad they found each other!

As it has already been said, you need a proofreader to edit your work. Not a big deal, but it will make you work easier to read. Good story line. Well done. Keep writing.

XYZ