Only You

A short one that popped in my head and had to come out

I stood in front of my bathroom's full-length mirror and smiled. I looked good.

At forty-five, I had a slim figure with curves in the right places. Large, still pert, breasts were my defining feature. My hips were wider than in my twenties, but I had a flat abdomen. My butt didn't sag, I owe that to my personal trainer making me earn that.

I was wearing my sexiest bra and panty set. A lovely black lace with sheer nylon set that was more for my partner than function. My hard nipples and large pink areola were clear through the sheer material.

The landing strip I meticulously shaped for my husband Joe's taste was also visible through the panty.

I wondered what Simon preferred?

I shook off that thought when I slipped on the red dress my husband loved so much. It was short but still tasteful. It showed enough cleavage to entice and attract attention without being slutty. It was classy sexy, as my husband had described.

I sat at my vanity and checked my hair. In anticipation of my big night, I had my hair done. Expensive but worth every penny.

I applied some light makeup, I knew Simon preferred that look as he mentioned it to me as one of my best features.

We'd been having lunch a few times a week and our conversations had at some point, turned to things of a personal nature.

Simon was dashing. I know that's an old-fashioned description, but it's perfect for him. He was my age, dressed impeccably, and carried himself with a class last seen in actors from those old movies my husband loved so much.

I left out handsome. Simon had a square jaw, a proud Roman nose, and the most amazing blue eyes I'd ever seen in person. His body was chiseled from his devotion to working out, which was what started our switch from being just co-workers to something more personal.

He commented on my fitness one day and asked where I worked out. That was the breakout from talking about work to talking about ourselves.

He began flattering me and I assumed that's how all workplace romances started. Simple niceties. A compliment on my dress, a mention of my change of hairstyle, an innocent touch--the beginning of the fall of a previously happily married woman.

That night was when we would escalate our casual relationship. Simon suggested that we should go out for dinner and martinis. It took me two days to agree.

It wasn't that I was unhappy with my husband, I guess we were just comfortable with each other. Simon was like a new drug. A different high that stirred my senses, and he had me addicted.

After my makeup was carefully applied, I smiled at myself. I knew he would love me as I looked. I planned to knock his socks off and I wouldn't fail. I had to be perfect for him.

My thoughts were shaken by the garage opening. Joe was right on time, as usual. He was such a creature of habit. I timed everything perfectly, I knew exactly when he'd walk through the kitchen and notice dinner wasn't cooking. He'd look around the first floor for me and find nothing--I wanted him to find me dressed for a night on the town. It was a big part of my plans for the evening--the reveal.

When Simon suggested our date night, I knew what it meant. We weren't kids, he was expecting all of me. I was going to give it to him.

He reserved a table at my favorite restaurant, he reserved a table at my favorite jazz club for martinis, and the final touch was the room he booked at the Hyatt across from the lounge.

He couldn't take me to his house, he was married as well, and his wife would be as upset as my husband would. I knew Joe would eventually get over it, our love was completely secure. I couldn't hide it from him though. I knew I had to tell home what I was going to do that night.

My best friend Carla told me it was the dumbest thing I'd ever planned to do. She seemed to think Joe wouldn't forgive me. She didn't know him as well as I did, though. I lived with him for twenty-three years up to that point and knew him like the back of my hand.

Joe began calling for me and I gave myself a final check. I had to be ready when he walked into the room. It was important to me that he saw me dressed to perfection. Classy sexy.

I slipped on my heels and went to find a suitable handbag. When he walked into the room I took a deep breath and walked out of the closet for my big reveal.

"Hey, baby," he said with a big smile. "Why are you all dressed up?"

"Joe, I need you to sit down. I have something to tell you and you might find it difficult to hear."

He looked at me like I had two heads, but sat in the chair by our window.

"Joe, I'm dressed this way for a date tonight. I wanted to give my man my best from head to toe; mind, body, and soul."

He looked sad. I hoped I didn't break him too badly.

"Honey, I've been having lunch a few times a week with a man from work named Simon."

A tear fell down his cheek. I had to steel myself for the rest of the story.

"No, we haven't been having an affair. I've never held his hand, never hugged him, never kissed him. Joe?"

His head was down in his hands. He pulled his hands back through his hair and looked at me like a beaten man. He said nothing.

"Joe, he asked me to go to dinner with him tonight, and I'm being completely upfront and honest with you, he reserved a hotel room. I'm sorry to say it took two days for me to accept. The way I saw it was it wouldn't be cheating if I told you."

He looked out the window and asked, "Sorry it took so long or sorry you accepted. Oh, and it's only not cheating if i agreed."

I sighed. "Joe, I've loved you for most of my adult life. Only you. I felt like I deserved it. A small break from us. Does that make sense?"

"Nope. Not in the least," he answered quickly.

I nodded. "That's why I'm dressed the way I am. I told you it was for my man. You're my man, Joe. You always will be."

"I don't understand," he said. "You said that prick reserved you a room and you agreed."

"That's right. I did agree, and at noon today I canceled."

"Why?" He asked.

"I was sitting at my desk and I got horny. Really horny, but it wasn't for Simon. I was looking at the picture of us on the beach in Cancun. You were shirtless and had your wayfarers on. God! You look so good in that picture. At that moment, I realized I didn't need Simon. I already had you."

He turned away from me. I walked to him and hugged him from behind.

"Joe, I knew I had to confess what I was going to do. I was so wrong and I'm sorry. I was hoping you could forgive my momentary stupidity and take me out tonight. I've taken Simon's reservations as they should've been for you and me, never him, in the first place."

I felt him take a deep breath.

"Joe? My love?"

"And what about Simon the shithead."

I smiled and turned him to face me.

"I called his wife and told her everything. Simon has a bigger problem to deal with than me canceling on him."

"You still agreed."

"I know and I have to live with that mistake, but please give me leniency based on my confession."

He snorted. "You only did that to ease your conscience."

I dropped to my knees. "Please forgive me. I was a fool."

He lifted my chin and said, "I'll forgive you, but you've broken my trust. I'll never forget this."

"I know. I'll never give you a reason to doubt me again."

I saw his pants bulge. I looked at him and he nodded. I smiled and unzipped his slacks.

I know it was a Pavlovian response to my being on my knees in front of him. He wasn't turned on by my confession.

I took his semi-hard shaft into my mouth until my lips touched his base. He hardened in my mouth and I pulled back.

I licked and hummed along the side of his long, thick cock. What the fuck was I thinking, accepting Simon's offer?

He groaned when I licked then sucked each of his balls. His sac was very sensitive. He trimmed his hair for me and I showed my appreciation as often as I could. I loved pleasing my man. God! I was so stupid.

I stroked him and savored the saltiness of his skin as I sucked his balls and kissed the base of his shaft.

After a few minutes, I bobbed on his hardness. I could never take him all the way, but that time I tried and gagged for my effort.

I pulled back to breathe and he said, "You know I don't like when you gag."

"I just wanted to give you everything I have to give," I whispered.

"Oh, I'll take that later. Finish me and let's go to dinner."

I knew what he was talking about. He wanted my ass. Was that my penance? I could only hope it would be that easy.

I bobbed, stroked, licked and sucked until he was ready to blow.

"Swallow every drop," he commanded.

I would comply and gave every effort to finish him.

He finally moaned as he shot spurt after spurt into my throat. I moaned as he did and then he got too sensitive. He pulled me off of him and frowned at me.

"That does not fix us."

I knew.

***

It didn't go away with that blowjob or our date or when I gave him my butt. A year later the emotional pain was still there. He wasn't quite the same with me and I could tell. Sex was a little rougher, my phone wasn't always where I left it, and once or twice I thought he'd followed me somewhere.

Breaking someone's trust is the worst thing you can do. It's like putting a broken plate back together. It's fixed but it will never be as strong as it was when unbroken. I have to live with that and it's hard.

Some will say I shouldn't have told him, because why hurt him.

Others will say he should've divorced me, because I'm an affair waiting to happen.

It's hard to argue those points, but I know me. I know I won't fall. I may have been close, but I snapped out of it and I hang my hat on that. I'll never lose my mind like that again.