Sometimes You Do What You Have to Do

“Harry, it’s 10 o’clock; aren’t you going to even look for a job today,” I asked. He looked down sullenly at his coffee cup as if he had no idea about how to answer. I was confused.

Harry had been an engineer for the same company, Munson Technologies, for almost 20 years (the only job that he had ever held), but technology changed and Harry no longer fit into his world. His company thought that they had the world by the tail with improvements in their simulators, so they never encouraged their people to upgrade their skills. Then when the world passed them by they folded leaving men like Harry by the wayside. He had looked for something to equal his six-figure income, but I could realistically see that that was never going to happen.

Harry looked up with tears in his eyes and admitted,” I took a job yesterday, and I report for work at 2 o’clock this afternoon.”

“That’s wonderful Harry!” I exclaimed. “ Maybe we can get straightened out. It was so embarrassing when they came and took my Expedition yesterday. Tell me about it. Why didn’t you tell me yesterday? Harry, answer me!”

“It’s not going to change things much Rachel. I took a job with the City as a guard at the dump. Sorry, I just had to get work of some kind, but it is only minimum wage, and we are going to lose everything anyway.”

Harry, was probably right. His Mercedes had been taken months ago, and the house was two payments in arrears. I know it was only a matter of a few days before it was gone like the rest of our possessions. Nasty phone calls from creditors were a normal thing everyday. Our savings were gone, the 401k was cashed in and spent, the children’s college funds had evaporated , and we were in debt up to our ears. “Harry, “I pleaded, “when is your first paycheck. At least maybe we can buy groceries. Right now we are broke.”

“ Not for two weeks,” he answered. “ I think we had better put the house on the market. I guess we should have done that a year ago.”

I knew he was right. I needed to find a job, but Harry was a proud man who didn’t think his wife should have to work. All of this had eroded our relationship to the breaking point. There was no closeness anymore. He couldn’t even face the kids. Harry was a broken man. We both sat in silence. What else was there to say?

******

I watched Harry leave for work in his old clunker. I had never seen him leave for work in anything other than a suit, but today he had an old shirt and torn pants. This was truly a grubby job. I thought that at least they could have given him a uniform or something. Harry’s depression showed on his face and in his motions. I had spent a year shoving my fears into the background, so that I could prop him up, but now I felt defeated too. I was tired of carrying this family on my shoulders. I wanted someone to take over and tell me what to do. I had always thought of myself as a strong capable woman, but now my confidence had eroded just like Harry’s. I needed someone to lean on, someone who would tell me that everything would be ok, and someone who could make me feel like a desirable woman again. I had to get out for a bit if only to escape the phone, so I left a note for the kids (they were 17 and 15, old enough to watch out for themselves), put on a light summer dress, and headed for the bus stop.

I think I look pretty good for my thirty-eight years. Oh yeah, they sag a little, but my “C cups” still had a lot of life, and my weight was no more than it was when I got married. I attributed that to a vigorous exercise program, good eating habits, and most importantly good genes. I still got a lot of looks from the guys passing by as I starred blankly into the windows at things that I could no longer afford. But I felt rather comfortable with the crowds and the anonymity. At least I didn’t have the neighbors watching and pitying me. I hated that most of all.

I came to a small bar and looked in. I had bus fare home and five dollars, so I debated between a gallon of milk or a beer. I had not treated myself to anything in a long time, so I made what was probably a very selfish choice. At least that was the way I felt at the time. When I entered I peered into the dimly lit room. There were a few well-dressed men sitting at t table and a couple of women at the end of the bar, but I thought little of that. I crept up to the bar and asked for a small draft, assuming that it was the cheapest thing they had.

“ What kind,” the Bartender asked.

“The least expensive,” I answered. “By the way, how much is it.”

“Six dollars mam,” he answered. “We only serve imported beer here.”

I heard a voice behind me. It was as confident and authoritative as it was demanding, “Give the lady a Heineken and I’ll have a Beck Dark.” I turned and looked into the darkest piercing eyes I had ever seen. The man was about 5’11”, trim, and absolutely beautiful. He looked to be about 45 with jet-black hair and a smile that would melt a marble statue.

“I can’t accept sir,” I said in an uncertain voice. Well, it was really my mothers “you can’t” with a “God yes” in the background.

“ I think you came in here for a beer,” he said. “I can’t make you do anything that you don’t want to in a public place like this, so why not? By the way, I’m Tom.”

I thought about some more “hard to get” things that I had in my repertoire, but I sat back down on the barstool instead and introduced myself. We chatted for awhile and had another beer while I grew quite comfortable with this man. Harry and I had been married for 19 years, and I had never cheated on him, but I could feel my inhibited resolve slipping away as I sipped my beer. I was never a prude, and although I never acted upon them, I certainly had my fantasies about sex with other men over the years.

Tom winked at the bartender and the bartender disappeared into what looked like a kitchen. Tom then turned to me, put his hand over mine, and through that disarming smile asked, ”How about some lunch.”

“Here?” I asked.

“This building has thirty floors of offices and ten floors of apartments. My company owns one of the apartments. I would like to have lunch there,” Tom advised.

“I can’t do that,” I answered without conviction.

Tom reached into his pocket and pulled out a roll of bills. He peeled off two hundreds and laid them on the bar. I looked at the money in horror. Do I look like a whore I thought? God, that is groceries for next week.

“Tom, I, I, I just can’t do that,” I stuttered.

“What, have lunch?” he said with that disarming smile.

“Tom, I know what you want. I have been a faithful wife. Please don’t tempt me like this. Things are hard enough as it is,” I said almost pleading with tears in my eyes.

“Just lunch,” he replied. You can say no and leave at anytime you want. You can even pick up the money and walk out the door right now.” I picked up the money and put my hand in his. “The die is cast,” I thought.

**********

The suite was beautiful with a view over the city, which was breathtaking. I guess the wink to the bartender meant get “the regular” upstairs because when we walked in there was a huge spread of chicken salad, cheese, sausage, crackers and French bread on a huge round oak table. Two bottles of White Zinfandel were cooling in ice by the plush chairs. When I walked into the room I actually sank into the carpet because it was so thick. Wow I thought, this guy must really be rich. Why would I have thought otherwise anyway?

We sat and enjoyed a leisurely lunch with one glass of wine after another. I am not much of a drinker, so I got a little tipsy quickly. After eating we walked to the window and watched life passing below us. He put his arm around my waist and turned me to him. I lifted my chin until I was lost in those eyes. His lips approached mine, and I surrendered. I wanted to be held, and kissed. It had been so long since I had had intimacy that I had forgotten how it felt to be in the warm grasp of a man. His tongue snaked its way into my mouth, and I quivered with excitement. I could think of no where that I would have rather been at this time.

“Love me! “ I exclaimed in a voice that seemed to come from someone else. You can keep the money, I just need you. I guess that was my last attempt at respectability, and I thought that it might be for quite some time.

He gently unzipped my dress and slid the straps off of my shoulders. The dress just fell and puddled at my feet. I reached down and felt his hardness, and I was proud that I could still effect a man like this. My self-esteem was receiving a huge shot in the arm.

He pushed me away enough to get to the front clasp of my bra and released my breasts for their prison. He looked, smiled, and said,” They are beautiful.” He touched my nipples and gently rolled them between his fingers. Just his presents made my pussy feel damp while we were downstairs in the bar; now the crotch of my panties was soaked.

As we stood before the window, he nibbled at my neck, and suckled at my breast, first one then the other. I felt as if I was being worshiped. I needed to please him. I had never been much for oral sex, but I knew what I had to do. I dropped to my knees before this man god and unbuckled his pants. I nuzzled his genitals through the material as I slowly unzipped the fly and let the pants fall to the floor. My prize was before me with only the fabric of his boxers as a barrier. I rubbed him in anticipation of the treat that was in store for me.

I reached in and pulled the plum though the hole until it was ready for inspection. God, it was beautiful. Long, but not too long and thick, oh yes very thick. Harry’s cock was just as long but thinner, and it was spear shaped. This one had a commanding big round head that made me want to submit to its supremacy. I felt honored to have the opportunity to make this magnificent tool spill its seed.

I started gently stroking him until he had reached his maximum hardness, but I knew that that was not enough. I licked the head and tasted his masculinity. Up and down the shaft I worked my tongue making him twitch and moan with pleasure. I wet him completely with my saliva and slid my hand up and down his shaft while I gently sucked his balls into my mouth. The taste was not like Harry. Oh, maybe close, but his was special. Maybe it was the wine or my infatuation with this man, but this smell and taste attracted me and made my cunt drip with my love juice. What used to seem like a chore was now a privilege.

As I licked up his shaft I spied a little thin droplet of juice on the tip. This must be pre cum I thought. Harry never made any. As I worked more it began to run freely, and I just could not resist. With the tip of my tongue I captured some and swirled it in my mouth. Ummmm, it was kind of sweet, I wanted more, but he stopped me. “My turn,” he said.

He pulled me up to my feet, and I started taking off his shirt as he rubbed my pussy through my panties. Then he put his fingers in the band and pushed them to the floor. I pulled him to me as we kissed trying to pull his cock into my belly. He reached around me and grabbed my cheeks and pulled me hard to him as my breasts pushed against his strong hairy chest. Oh, yes, this was so nice. Then he picked me up and carried me into the bedroom. We lay next to each other caressing each other’s bodies. His fingers worked into my pussy until I thought I would explode.

“You are really hot!” he exclaimed with surprise.

“I know,“ I replied. I could feel my juice running down my leg. “I never make this much juice, you are so very special. I want you to cum in my mouth, please.”

“Do you usually do that?” he asked.

“No never,” I replied as I moved my body to place my mouth over his member. That wasn’t really the truth, I did let Harry cum in my mouth, but I didn’t like it much and usually stopped short of his orgasm. I never swallowed either. I didn’t know why this was different, but everything was different.

I started working him with my tongue around that head that mesmerized me. I wondered how it would feel parting my pussy lips, but I knew I couldn’t find out because I was fertile, and I was off the pill. As I took more and more of him into my mouth and throat, he became more and more demanding. Soon he was fucking my mouth as I sucked as hard as I could. I wanted to be used like a rag doll. I wanted to be dominated. God, I wanted his cum.

I felt his balls tighten first, and then his cock expanded even more. I could feel the warmth of his precious seed in my mouth even before I could taste it. He made gallons, and he just kept fucking me until he purged the last of his love juice into my hungry mouth. I swallowed every drop and sucked hard for more.

He became like a man possessed. He pushed his mouth to my cunt and started sucking and licking. He worked around my lips and pushed his tongue into my vagina until I was bucking to get him in farther. Then he pushed in two fingers and finger fucked me as he sucked my clit. I felt it rising in me. My orgasms with a man were few and far between, but I knew one was coming now. I started screaming, “ Oh god yes, eat my pussy. Oh baby, make me cum. Oh it is wonderful. Make me cum yes oh; oh; oh; gooddddd yes, oh, oh. I had the strongest orgasm of my life. I was numb all over and quivering with feelings. I mashed his face into my wanton cunt, but he didn’t seem to mind. Wow, that was the best ever.

We lay together as he kept rubbing me. His cock was still very hard and I knew he wanted more. Oh who cares, I have to have that in me I thought.

“Would you please fuck me now sir,” I giggled.

“My pleasure mam,” he replied as he mounted me. He was very gentle entering me even though I was really wet and ready from my orgasm. I could feel his head spread my lips as he eased in. I could feel my love tunnel expand to accommodate his size, and it felt wonderful. Slowly he eased all the way in and started gently moving in and out. He was so slow and gentle. I had never had a man do me like this, and I loved it. I had very few vaginal orgasms, but I knew I was going to have one now.

I felt it building inside me. My hips started gyrating, and my cunt walls clutched at his cock. I wanted him deep and pushed my pussy against him as hard as I could. “I’m cumming, yes fuck me, fuck me harder. I am cumming yes ohhhhhh, ohhhhhh, yes. The eruption was sensational. I could feel my juice flowing over his cock, and he started to pound me. There was nothing but blackness in my eyes and my hair felt like it was standing straight up on my head. Finally he slowed, but I knew that he had not cum.

“On your knees Rach,” he demanded. I was so weak that I could hardly move, but I had to accommodate him. I got on my knees, and he pushed his hard meat into my drenched pussy. There was no slow gentleness now. One hard push and then his rhythmic pumping. He reached around me and touched my clit, and I went off again.

“God, you are a great fuck,” I screamed. As I fell onto my stomach. His cock was still in me but not all of the way, and he still had not cum.

“On top you fucking cunt,” he said. I eased down on to his cock and rested on his pelvis. I hardly had the strength to breathe, but he was insistent. Make me cum you little whore. Take my cum inside you now.”

I started fucking him with all I had. My cunt was smashing his pelvis as I bounced up and down on him. There was no love here, just pure raw sex, and for the first time in my life I loved it. I could feel his cock harden as he approached orgasm, but I lost control. My forth orgasm of the day paralyzed me, took my breath and made my pussy clamp down on his cock. Such ecstasy, such feeling, it was better that I ever imagined it could be. My clutching his cock did the job, and I felt his warm sperm fill me. We both collapsed in a heap; exhausted.

He didn’t hang around long after that. I guess he felt he had no emotional obligation to a whore. He reached in his pocked and pulled out some bills again and handed me three hundred more. “Rachel, you are the best fuck ever,” he stated. I want you again day after tomorrow. I am sending my driver to take you home and you can arrange for him to pick you up then. Here are some morning after pills. I would have to guess that you are no longer on birth control”

“Tom, I can’t keep doing this. Please I am not that kind of girl,” I tried to explain.

“Look cunt, this is not going to end here. I want more. You have more passion in you than any woman that I have ever met. I know you need the money, so be here,” he said as if he expected that to be the last word. I felt humbled, but perhaps I needed to be told instead of asked.

It was the last word. I took a shower and finished dressing as the driver knocked on the door.

“Tom, wants me to make arrangements for you to pick me up on Thursday, but I don’t think I can do that,” I tried to explain.

“Mr. Mathews gets what he wants lady.” Wow, Tom Mathews was the most prominent lawyer in town I thought. “You must be special; he never wants any one more than once. I will pick you up at the same place I drop you off today,” he stated as if he expected no further comment. There was none.

He led my to a black limo and drove me to a corner near home. I asked if we could make one stop for me to pick up some groceries along the way, and there was no objection. In fact the treated me with great respect and advised me that he was at my disposal until he let me out. Wow, what a day.

*********

As soon as Harry left I was in the shower preparing for the next adventure. I had reconciled myself to selling my body, as much as could be expected. I knew that it was wrong, but this seemed safe and we needed the money desperately. Another day or two like the last one and I would have a house payment together.

I didn’t even know the driver’s name, but he was very handsome. He was also very large, and I thought that perhaps he doubled as a bodyguard for Tom. Actually I thought that he could guard my body anytime. He was really very nice and respectful to me. As I walked to the corner I thought about the other day and how good it felt. I had never been given so much pleasure; but then again I had never put as much into sex as I had that day. Maybe it was that it had been such long time, or that I had already left my inhibitions behind, but I had never in my life made love with such reckless abandon.

The car was waiting when I arrived at the corner, and the driver was waiting patiently to open the door for me. As I slid into the seat I saw five hundred dollars on the seat. “What is this?” I asked.

“That is for following instructions, and giving me a blow job right now,” the man answered.

He flipped a switch and a porn movie appeared on a TV screen. I had no doubt that the man meant what he said. It almost seemed like a test or something. “But I don’t even know your name,” I said evasively.

“And you aren’t going to either,” he replied. “First you are going to take off that dress, then you are going to take it out and do a good job. Got that bitch!”

I turned to the door, but then I saw the money just lying there waiting for me. “You can take the money and leave if you wish, or you can do as you are told and enjoy the rest of your adventure today,” he said. He was smiling now for the first time since I had met him. Almost as if they had a mind of their own, my fingers moved to my zipper and pulled off my dress. He didn’t ask, but I removed my bra and panties too. I looked into his eyes to read his reaction but there was none. My hands moved to his zipper and I freed his member from its confines. As I took his cock into my mouth I got the feeling again that I was owned and had little choice about my future actions.

His cock was as big as I expected from such a big man. It was in fact the biggest I had ever seen. It even made Tom’s instrument of pleasure a dwarf by comparison. I had a hard time taking the whole thing, so I started sucking and licking the head while I rubbed the remainder. His hips started to rock, and he put his hand on my head with my hair intertwined with in his fingers. As his excitement grew he started fucking my face furiously. Deeper and deeper he pushed until I could no longer breath. I created a rhythm, inhaling, and exhaling on every other stroke. I felt him harden, his balls contacted, and my efforts were rewarded with a deposit of warm salty cum that I promptly swallowed.