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Click hereBaaaaaaaaaaDooooooooom! AHH, WHAT THE FUCK. I had just risen up with a startled gasp realizing that the booming sound was just nothing but thundering and lighting crackling through the sky. Damn that scared the ever living shit out of me.
After a few seconds of trying to catch my breathe and getting my all too fast beating heart back down to my chest I laid back down to finish up my rest. After tossing and turning for a few seconds it seem like finishing up my sleep has proven to be the wrong option. Sitting back up, looking around for something do, I finally decided that maybe a book might out me back to sleep.
Stepping outside my bedroom I see shadows up against my hallway walls that put a little fright in me. I eased my way down the hallway feeling like I was in some Alfred Hitchcock movie or Wes Craven even and something will jump out to get me. Trying the light switch nothing happen, 'great my power is out, no biggies I'll read by candle light.'
Still walking down the hallway I could the winds beginning to howl a haunting tune just like in a real horror movie, and the thunder sounded with a terrifying gesture. Calming myself thinking is just plain stupid that I am afraid a simple thunderstorm 'what am I? 6'
Continuing the journey towards the living room, I cam up short with a shaky scream when I see the silhouette of a man just standing there, looking. Standing for couple of minutes hidden in the shadows, about to make a run for it but, my movement seize when I realize it was just my self defense dummy being framed by the dying flame in the fireplace.
Once that scary thought was out of my head I am now thinking to myself 'why anybody would be trying to break into someone's house in this type of weather, or better yet why anybody would be out anyways. They are just asking to get hypothermia.'
Walking over to the living room closet I felt around at the top for matches. Standing on my tip toes grabbing the only flashlight I accidently knocked down the families spell book. Thinking to myself that I never realize it was still there. Opening up the book flipping through pages I stopped in mid flip looking at the picture of my older sister and me.
Looking at the pictures instantly getting memories back from that day when we were just little dressing up for Halloween as our witchy selves but the Hollywood version of it. We had the black sparkly dresses, stripy socks, and the signature witches hat. Oh and of course broomsticks. Putting the picture back into the book, I got up and let the flashlight guide my path to the bookcase. Putting the spell book between two other books and the flashlight in tow I notice there was another family spell book on another book shelves.
Lighting the candles and putting them on the coffee table I went back to the bookcase grabbed that big ole spell book flopped down on the couch and started reading. Defense potion: two table spoons of Dead Sea salt, tears of a crying bull, soil from a dragon bull plant, and three table spoons from a Tasmania Devil blood. Invisibility spell: hear me now and listen be to the things that should be unseen. Let thou enemies be blinded by the sight of thee.
Getting way into deep with the spell book, I stopped for a second and realize the winds of the thunder storm were getting stronger with each passing minute. It almost seemed like it was banging up against the house. It took me a minute before I realize the banging wasn't coming from the winds. The banging was due to somebody trying to come in. Jumping up with my heart in my throat again I panic at what I should. This not my mind playing tricks on me somebody is really trying to break in. Then suddenly everything stops I stand in silence with the exception of my breathing and the thunder storm still going on. Being little rusty with my witchcraft to fend this person what else should I do?
After a few seconds of just standing there the door knob starts to jiggle. Now this person really is trying to get in. I ran over to the fire place grab the fire poker and ran back to the corner next to the door. With door continuing on I raise my weapon close my eyes took a deep breathe.
Then everything seem to freeze in time once jiggling stopped and the front blow open with the strong winds. There in my doorway was a huge man maybe 6'5 or 6'6. I kept looking up and notice his eyes, they were this eerie green color and they almost seem like they glowing. He took one small lazy step forward. I was getting ready to bash him over the head but before I could he fell to the ground.
This story has a good start so far. It definitely pulled me in, and now I am very curious to see what will happen next. You do a good job with creating tension. Keep up the writing! :)
I am interested to read more, though I second other comments regarding contacting an editor. Keep writing and remember that practice makes perfect!
Needs a lot of work even before you pass it to someone to check, you should take down and try again.
Your syntax and spelling were awful and made it very hard to read. If you intend to write more, please have someone read it before you submit it.
That wasn't enough to pull me in. It was quite short. Write more so I can see if I'll like it. The premise of a wiccan and a were (?) - we don't know what the big man is yet- could be interesting. Fill it out more and give us a longer chapter. I'll read the next.