All Comments on 'If You've Got Trouble'
by Harddaysknight
- 198 Comments
as usual female characters more than stupid than a 10 year old child.
They all only have a quarter of a brain??
- I didn't know it wasn't good....
- I was only helping to cover up his affair.....
More women who don't know that lying, betraying and cheating is not good. This is so stupid...
Why not write about "smart" women who know what they are doing, who accept the consequences and responsibilities of their actions, whether they have regrets or not, whether they fight to try to continue their marriage or no.......but not on such stupid female characters.
Why didn't he advise his best friend to divorce the wife that actually cheated, not just lied?
Very good story about trust issues even without actual cheating. Well done.
Lucky Jack, the guy Mandy was with, saw what was going on and slipped out the back. D
Very good story. This is one case where counseling and a post-nuptial agreement make sense. Mandy has shown some serious character flaws and the road to recover will not be easy.
I think Will is making a mistake taking Dana back. Mandy lied, which is horrible and damaging; Dana actually let another man inside her which is unforgivable
This is a 5-star tale showing that covering for a cheater is as bad as cheating, and in fact, Mandy should have done what Tim did to Will: not only refuse to cover for him, but threatening to beat the crap out of him and dissolve the business to keep him from cheating !
Very nicely done.
HDK delivers more of his signature mix of humour and bathos.
I was struck, though, by the use of "blood is thicker than water" to mean that family ties are more important than anything else. I realise that, that this the generally accepted meaning, but it's actually the opposite of what the original author intended! The original quote reads something like, "The blood shed in combat is thicker than the water of the womb". I think it's amazing how meanings morph over time; take a look at the original meaning of 'nice' as a another example.
I'm still waiting to read these stories by franceman about smart women who know what they are doing, accept the consequences, etc.
For a sister to beg for help and then throw her under the bus to save her own ass, she should be disowned and shunned for that!
Expectedly good, unexpected plot, short, but gets a lot done.
Kind of weak and cringe at the end when the son says that it seems clear that "anything goes" with Mom, for Dad, if Dad agrees.
1) I do not remember Mom telling the lids anything like "anything goes." Sure, Mandy-Mom said "I'll accept whatever you decide without complaint," and was wearing sexy sun-dress, but that is not "anything goes." She was talking about divorce, forgiveness, whatever, along those lines.
2) The kids do not even seem to be 18 (Trent is 17), so, uhh.....
Almost faultless other than that, really liked it.
5 for you
Good story but please be more vigilant in guarding against name switches. That one at the end from 'Tim' to 'Will' kind of spoiled it a bit.
JR
Always excited to discover another story from you! This one did not disappoint.
Lord, another pussy-pass. And a pathetic husband. NOT because he takes her back, but because he goes against his very nature of never accepting lies.
It's like he got hit with the Martian Wimp Ray, the close variant of the Martian Slut Ray. He's all in for dumping her because she violated his life-long tenet of complete honesty, then turns 180 degrees and his bedrock principle no longer matters.
It's not that an author can't write a forgiving character, but don't start with a hard ass when you do. And for goodness' sake don't have them change in an instant from "I have divorce papers here for you" to "Oh, I luuuuuv you and forgive you for being blatantly dishonest to me and our entire family." That's a hypocrisy that destroys the credibility of the story. THAT'S the Martian Wimp Ray in action.
so
you turn the MC into a stupid "teenage boy" seeing bare breast and everything is fine. NOT what I expect from this writer !
Reading this story was as interesting as listening to a preachers sermon. Yuck.
Hard NO! The next chapter is from the wives perspective laughing with their lovers about how easy it was to convince the cucks to keep housing and feeding them while they get to keep fucking around. People don’t change very often. Once they prove others are more important you can NEVER trust them. Unless of course they wear the yellow dress and leave some buttons undone. Then it’s ok to take them back because now your kids have been taught that with a little seduction deception becomes ok. As long as you’re giving me some it’s ok to give it to others. All you have to do is get used to the taste of dick. Every time you kiss her, think about were those lips have been.
Pfft. Writing boys and girls with principles like cooked pasta. They all deserved each other. 2/5
The thought that dogged me through most of the story was that Mandy had cheated as well. However, no one else knows that she did and she never admits it, even in her thoughts. For the reader, this is a perfect encapsulation of the problem Tim faces, how can I trust my wife? How does the reader KNOW that Mandy hasn't cheated. That issue weighs heavily in our perception and ultimate judgement of Mandy. Since we can never be sure, we have to depend on the people that know Mandy best, Tim and her children. They forgave her and the question of her fidelity was never really raised. So, unless you are very deeply cynical, the reader is led to forgive her as well. Happy ending.
I don't understand, why was she with Dana and Matt anyway, was she going to watch them have sex also? There is one thing to lie to cover up the affair, but another to put your self in the middle of it to cover it up. HDK, you should have flushed this out a little better on the Mandy front.
Absurdly rigid and bluenosed much and a ridiculous overreaction by Tim the uncheated-on husband. And as is usual in such tropes WAY too much groveling by the uncheating Mandy,
It's an okay story, a little rushed. There's a mistake near the end when you say Will, when the context was Tim. And the son and daughter are effectively suggesting their mother be the husband's sex slave to fix it ... It's a scene from the Twilight Zone.
But I'll give it a 4.
Nice story.
My only issue is that once a woman has dug in her heels and gotten as self righteous and indignant in defending her position as Mandy was at the start of the story ... She's not going to admit she was wrong that quickly.
Marriage 101!
Well, Life 101, actually.
This is written so that it could be used as a primer for premarital counseling, in such simple terms as to not ever be confusing.
Thanks for a great read! 5*****
I loved the irony between the liar and the cheater. Other than that, it was a pretty good story but not up to HDK's usual standard. Four stars,
Thanks to HDK for another story with his unique brand of humor and whimsy. We should all be grateful that his story is far more successful than the Beatles song of the same name--noted by many as the worst Lennon-McCartney song ever recorded, and unreleased until their Anthology 2 album in 1996. We can also be grateful that HDK didn't wait until his own Anthology 2 to release this one!
Those kids sure seemed far more comfortable discussing their parents' sex life than any teenagers I've ever been around! I did also notice the Will/Tim mix-up near the end; I wonder why HDK never employs more unusual names? If one husband had been named Recep Tayyip Erdoğan and the other Andrés Manuel López Obrador, I feel sure he wouldn't have made this mistake.
Thanks, ohio
Now I have this kid, Ohio, jumping on my shit? It never was one of my favorite states. What the hell are 'Buckeyes' anyway? I'll admit this title was not one of the Fab Four's best songs, but the implied meaning that this isn't one of my best stories is just plain malicious. I do like the idea of more complex names, but I have proven myself far too lazy to use such long names in a story. I may just go through Ohio's library making nasty comments and voting one on every story, if I can get Lit to drop the original five that I gave him. This kind of aggression cannot stand!
So, how pissed off would Tim have been if Mandy had kept Dana's secret, but not been as helpful in enabling Dana's affair?
.
Most people wouldn't have helped Dana keep seeing her side guy, but most women would also not have ratted out their sisters.
Jasonnh wrote, " For the reader, this is a perfect encapsulation of the problem Tim faces, how can I trust my wife? How does the reader KNOW that Mandy hasn't cheated. "
.
How does ANYONE know that a husband or wife hasn't cheated?
I really liked this story. I am surprised at those who think Tim is too rigid. I personally like his thinking. My dear departed Dad's biggest thing was how much he hated a liar. If you do something wrong, own up to it, take the consequences and work things out. He could forgive almost anything except a lie.
To Tim, Mandy's lying to cover Dana's cheating shows him she could have as easily cheated herself. The reconciliation at the end where Mandy confessed and apologized was right on the money.
Don't see how Dana can be so easily forgiven and hopefully Tim will make Mandy work hard for his forgiveness.
Otherwise good story from an underserved POV during an uncomfortable situation.
Sorry for nitpicking but Mandy calling the kids’ father “Tim” sometimes and dad other times was disorienting. I do love the lesson for all us reader, especially in today’s world. 4.2*
Wanted to like this but the kids sounded more adult like Nathan the adults.
Still, I got a kick out of the tale.
I have never referred to my wife by here first name when talking to my kids. That part was weird for me
GarySmith691 minute ago
Who am I to critique a story, but and yes I know I'm a dinosaur, but I am backing Tim 100% he sounds like a straight shooter to me. As for his wife, well I'm not sure about her, but she didn't actually cheat, at least the writer didn't mention it so I can see forgiveness there.
However, Dana? Will forgives her because he almost cheated? Not sure that makes too much sense. But it's not my story.
Tim rocks. We need more people like that in the world. I like it basically ends with innuendo which is actually more exciting than another moist and turgid sex scene.
An interesting story focusing on the "wing-woman" in an affair. I've run across some of these (in a few virtually /everyone/ is involved), and they're often more interesting that are stories that focus just on the cheater. Maybe because they're rarer. Possibly (Jekyll thinks) because they extend the issue. One doesn't doubt only the one cheating person but a potential field of friends, family, co-workers, and so forth. The world itself becomes much more untrustworthy. Thanks for posting.
(Oh, I do agree with others that the kids seem awfully self-assured and mature)
Good short story. I really liked the kids. As another commenter noted, they seemed more mature than their parents. Tim and Mandy must have done something right!
A bad position for a GUY to be in who has unwavering standards and morals. Looks like all will be worked out. Enjoyed the read, Thanks for your writing..
He was destined to forgive her eventually. He would know she did not cheat. The question is how could she be blind loyal to her sister when she is not a cheater herself, speak some awful crap about her husband, and do it without any real internal conflict? That's what's missing. She doesn't just keep her sister's secret, but she is a willing witness to adultery. She is too comfortable with her own lies.
Occasionally those small miracles happen and HDK post a new story. Yay! You're on a roll, dude. My thanks for the read, Randi.
I don't know if this was meant to be funny or was unintentionally so. Anyway, it was a fun read.
Sweet short story. Too bad some of our political leaders don’t have Will’s moral code and refusal to lie or accept liars.
It should be obvious that truth in a marriage is just like the keystone of an arch. Remove the keystone and the arch crumbles, remove the truth and the marriage will fall apart.
I am bucking the trend, I didn't like it. Not that Tim was rigid or was willing to divorce Mandy overhear lying. It was getting. The kids involved, especially at the end. Kids are not going to get involved. In their parents sex life like that, it totally icks kids out ( note, I am not saying kids being involved in the sex act, I mean kids have a giant ick with talking about their parents having sex). E even that tim told his son and daughter the details of the affair was dicey.
That hurt the story for me.
The key is that Mandy finally chose not to justify her lies. Justifying only says she’s sorry she was caught. Good story.
Not sure i like Tim. His way is a very fundamentalist way of thinking. If you are as inhumanly inflexible in your thinking as he is, he will always find fault in others. Humans are flexible and you need to be able to deal with that. Mandy has to resort to the promise of sex in order to change his views, and not to trust the words of his wife. This shows him to be a hypocrite in my view. The man with the iron will has clay feet. You only need to look at at the lawyer character in liar, liar to know what happens when you always need to say the truth. Sometimes it is better to not say anything at all.
excellent the way truth proves to be the right and only way to go truth is always the right choice
If i compare this with Hooked1957's "Not So Simple Love Story" I think I rated this much better then Hooks. This one was much staight forward beginning eith the title whike Hooked' was a misinformation when his story was really a simple romance story albeit it has some mild revenge. The firgiveness and taking back of the wife in HDK's story is more realistuc and the mistake easier ti swallow than Hooked's even though the majority of commenters loved the recon story. But I didn't. Sure forgiveness is essential but the mistakes were truly hard ti firget and reconcialiation almost non viabke. In all I think Hooked's was a subtke cuck stiry burued in goid writing. Kudos to on this one.
Like the legal profession, a mad rush to avoid personal responsibility.
Most enjoyable, thanks.
The male M/C is the strength of your tale. I know many would make fun of Tim’s stand but if you aren’t true to yourself, you have nothing. Great object lesson and well told story. 5/5
Minus a star, as always for the name eff-up at the end, calling Tim 'Will'. This one didn't do much for me, especially when the lying, cheating sister goes all hypocritical on Mandy for helping her, Dana. Dana is a grown woman, supposedly capable of making her own decisions, and mistakes. She shouldn't NEED Mandy, or Tim, to keep her from making them. And Tim had a piece of rebar up his ass. I'm surprised he could bend over enough to tie up his shoes. Would Mandy's lying have caused me to divorce her? Likely not. Lose trust in her and respect for her, yes.
Tim was a terrible friend to Will.
Only a naive fool would coerce a man into reconciling with a cheating wife.
A wife is only tempted to cheat when she's lost all respect for her husband. Women need emotional investment before getting to physical infidelity, so it's never "just sex" when they start an ongoing affair.
-
Tim also had the right idea when he was going to divorce Mandy.
Whores of a feather flock together, and the fact that his wife was happy to cover up Dana's affair, speaks volumes about her lack of respect for either husband. Mandy lied to his face multiple times, then got butthurt and indignant when confronted about her web of lies. She shattered all the trust in her marriage.
This should have ended with both husbands divorcing their wives.
4*
Not to say Tim wasn't right but I think he overreacted a bit, but then there'd be no drama.
I can't see Will caving so easily nor can I see him telling his wife about his past failed attempt at cheating. Also, the MC Tim is a hard line guy on trust and he so easily gives in. I am not a fan of saying he needs an immediate divorce but I don't see him changing his thoughts so easily because the kids say Mom will do anything for you.
And on that note, what kids talk to their mother like that? Beth who is younger than 17 I think talking sex for forgiveness?
Thanks for sharing...
A good strong 4* , nice to see that humor of yours make an appearance:)
A good tale, but the lame last paragraph took it from five stars to four.
/
JPB NOT BOB
Great story, liked the twist, Mandy being the one being most punished for her sister’s affair.
Thanks for sharing.
The dialogue read like it was written by a fourteen year old. You should try read your dialogue out loud because no-one talks in paragraphs like a sermon. Worse than that, the plot was trite. 2 Stars.
Not exactly what I was expecting, but very well written. 5*, of course.
By the time one get's through the poorly written first few paragraphs of overdone tropes, such as taking video with one's phone, to the plot that is a minor variation on the theme. All that one is left with, is dialogue that reads like long rambling monologues. Not a good attempt. If this had been writen by a new author, Harddaysknight would have had no qualms about berating him... Yet here it is.
I agree, as a general fan of your work, this appeared rushed or not fully reviewed. Early on the wife refers to her husband by name while talking to their daughter, like you'd talk to a friend and not a loved one. There there were paragraphs where the speaker didn't change but there was a paragraph thus the same without reference to who the speaker was. Felt choppy right there.
Talk about a piss-poor attempt at a tired old plot without any redeaming fratures.
London Calling
You’ve lost some of your mojo, HDK. This story has a great message, but it’s a trite effort. Three stars ⭐️ for this one.
So Will condones his wife cheating because he THOUGHT about it years before? HDK should have really revisited that as a premise for forgiveness. Completely ridiculous to think that you forgive someone for serially fucking someone else because you considered it. No. Just fucking no. The entire end of this story is just horseshit.
Another cuck story with Tim being led around by his dick and the "profound moral reasoning" of teenagers. I could buy a reconciliation on these facts, but the story degenerated into the same-old, same-old at the end.
People are confusing. I told an old buddy of mine that another one of our buddies was fucking his fiance. Both ended up hating me and they became the best of friends. Twenty years later the one that's still alive hates me and married the same girl for a few years until both cheated on the other. 😂
An enjoyable little story.
I was a little surprised that the issue of Mandy's own potential infidelity was never made an issue. She lied about her sister, what else might she have lied about? It is an obvious question.
Part of the reason that Tim is so stuck on honesty is that if his wife can lie about that, what else might she be lying about?
Overall a fun little story. But forgiveness came too easily, in my opinion.
A really good story and an enjoyable read. Nice that the one wife didn’t cheat but the lies were of considerable concern and rightfully so. I liked the ending as well second chances for everyone!
🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟.