Falling

I am as much to blame as he.

I fell into his arms like it was no big deal.
It wasn’t a big deal.

It started with an arm around my waist.

There was one kiss on the top of my head.
I thought it was the sweetest thing he had ever done.

His arm snaked its way around my waist several more times.

I kissed his shoulder.
I couldn’t resist.

His hands grabbed at the waist of my pants.
He pulled me close – too close?
No, not too close.

We kissed.
Once.
Twice.
I duck to avoid three.

He gravitates towards me in the empty room.
He joins me on the couch.

I close my eyes.

His breath is hot against my hand.

I’d always wanted to know what his hands feel like in mine.
What his tongue feels like against my skin.

Better than I hoped.

I would have given anything for a different outcome.
Hating would have been so much better than loving.

We both started it this time.

He is as much to blame as I.