All Comments on 'A Boy In Babeland Ch. 10'
by Nemasis Enforcer
- 12 Comments
Ok this was kinda boring i mean there was really no story i tink it was just rushed through. ok and also it has been 2 weeks since the last story was written couldn't you have made this a little better?
Your bored ? It's been two weeks? Who died and left you in charge? If you are so damn good, wright your own story, put your name on it and send it in. till then, SHUT THE FUCK UP, and let a guy who is wrighting a damn Great Story alone!!!!!!!
Learn to write. Learn to spell. Listen to how real people talk. How old are you—18?
Jane
This is pretty good writing. i agree with what the other person said (second comment) and you people that have nothing but complaints should shut up ad go write your own story.
Ignore the idiots that wouldn't know a good story if it bit them on the ass... Some people would complain if they were hung with a new rope... I've read all of the stories that you have written in this series and I gotta hand it to you... I wish that I had the talent to write as well as you do... You've gotten the top rating on each and every one of this series from me...
This was built up well from the previous installment, to let us know Kim was still shy, but grew bolder. This was a big step for her and we read about it. Then she loses her virginity to him. It was described well enough to certainly seem real to both her and to us.
Hey! If it's "the Queen's English" you want, read Shakespeare. True the spelling could be better, but the writing is superb. This isn't just about the sex, there's a lot of love involved. (Just read a few stories by some of the other hacks that write on this site, and you'll see what I mean!) To "Nemasis Enforcer": GREAT! I love "first time" stories. Keep it coming.
Shit! I knew that Lee and Kim would be a banger literally. I'm like I've read all up to this point and your spelling you had a few errors but other than that I'ma keep reading
i agree with Nicksfixs on the spelling and grammar but still tops my list
I could actually feel taking her virginity!! Awesome detailing!! Keep going!!
Just perfect a realistic first time experience. Emotion, nevers, physical reactions all real world and very well written. Good job