All Comments on 'A Girl Named Mitch Ch. 04'
by JCMcNeilly
- 257 Comments
God I wish I could give you more than five stars. Now where did I put that box of tissues?
Another amazing story full of love and passion. Your characters are great and all the depicted situations and interactions feel real. You can identify yourself to them. Continue writing because you are a great writer. And the fact that you know Robert Jordan and Ticket to Ride is a plus. :-) :-)
5 stars only - sadly I'm not allowed to give you more...
You are one of the best writers I found here!
There are many deep and good thoughts in your story, but what really touched me in this chapter was the little sentence: "Making someone earn love is abusive"
I've said this before, but again: Thank you so much for taking the time to write, edit (thanks ash_legend and rileyworks!) and publish (for free!) this wonderful story. Loved it :)
To give this comment a little more substance, just two things: My two favorite things about the story and my least favorite thing, starting with the latter. I'm not personally (and I realize this is case of preference where I think the majority of readers here disagrees with me) a big fan of leaving nothing unresolved a story like this and ending on children, professional success and eternal happiness. That is, to be fair, about my only gripe with your story, and it's a minor one, concerning just the last few paragraphs, but still: I felt like their devotion to each other wasn't really in question, and so I didn't feel like it had to be spelled out. Again: Personal preference :)
For two of the things I liked most, I want to point out something that sets this story apart from your other projects - we've already established that you're great at writing both heartache and conflict as well as happiness and bliss, and while I did want to repeat that praise, it's not unique to this story. So I'll go with the perspective instead: I really enjoyed you writing this as a story told in retrospect. It allows you to very occasionally break the fourth wall - acknowledging in passing how a certain worry or the long path to realizing there's more than friendship there seems different or much more obvious in retrospect than in the moment, for instance. And I personally found a connection between my own point of view as reader and Cindy as narrator of the story that deals with what I think is a limitation of stories published on this website; we know or strongly expect the relationship to work out, happy forever after and all, and I found that mirrored in some ways in Cindy telling her story. To a certain extent, my reader perspective is also retrospective, if that makes any sense - I'm assuming a certain ending and read your story in light of it, whether I want to or not.
The second thing is a little more brief: I liked how you decided against what I think of as the "usual structure" of these stories (this is not really different from your other stories, but bears repeating). You could have easily made the conflict with her family the big finale at the end of chapter 3, closed it with a cliffhanger, really lingered on their time apart and then reconciled everything midway through the final chapter, but you didn't, and I'm grateful for it. The way you dealt with the scene between her and her father felt much less forced and much more like an overdue, necessary final step in this way, and I really liked that.
So again: Thanks a lot! Please take some time off, you deserve it, and we'll all be ecstatic when you return with whatever your next project is :)
Just in tears atm. Such a great series, heart warming, heart braking, sensual and occasional genuine laugh out loud moments. This story has everything. Thank you!
Way to 'stick the landing'! JC, I especially loved the post college transition and the highly optimistic twenty year postscript (although I highly doubt extended families get discussed in tennis commentary). It was a lovely way to wrap up both series.
I've known far to many Stuck up people like the father that refuse to accept their child's sexuality. Something that my own don't have to worry about. They are my children and I love them no matter who they love. Your stories are excellent and deserve the 5* ratings that they get.
I'm sobbing. I've been religiously looking at this website everyday for updates since i read the first part. I didnt read 'tennis star's prior to this so it felt like tennis star was a sequel to this story. As always you were absolutely phenomenal. The only thing I missed was at least a few paragraphs from Mitch's point of view, specially in the early chapters. But anyway, thank you so much for sharing your talent with us. Excited for the new stories to come!
I was amazed it was beautifully written and shows what real life is like and I would ask what did happen with Cindy's parents did they ever see there grandchildren but Cindy and Mitch have shown there love conquors everything life throws at them pleased they have a person who loves and gives them all there love and receives love in return I am happy for you both and show the world you are strong and able to cope with whatever life throws at you both fantastic stories hope you write more soon. xx
Such a lovely story! Such good storytelling, such adorable characters. One of the other commenters complimented you on how you handled the coming out scene with Cindy's parents, and I completely agree. I'm glad to be living in an era when this "married happily ever after" ending is possible. Sometimes the arc does bend toward justice, and all that. Thank you for sharing this delicious, loving story with us and please keep it up!
Such a tremendous story. You captured everything a story needs. Heartache, heartbreak, strength, and a happy ending. I look forward to your next story
Beautiful story and I love how you developed it. You had part of it in Tampa, where I live and I was hoping for a few glimpses of local color, but still very superbly done.
I’m in pieces here! Such a beautiful story. You just get better and better. I absolutely cannot wait for your next story. I will wait as long as it takes. You are definitely one of the top lesbian authors on Lit! Thank you so much for sharing your talent with us. Much love and many thanks.
Tissues please. This story was excellent for the fact that we didn't have big dramatic pain, there were small pain points of discovery along the way, but nothing that Cindy and Mitch couldn't overcome just loving each other. I guess I'm trying to say it felt wholesome.
I'm also glad you didn't drag out Cindy's family drama. That hurt is all too real.
What a superb series. I am not a super fan of "all wrapped up in a bow future" endings, but I have to say the tie in with Carrie and Iryna make it too sweet not to enjoy. Thank you for sharing this story with us all. And can I also say thank you for feeding my addiction of reading a complete series within such a short time. I don't know if I could have enjoyed it as much if it came over a few months. You gave me just enough time to run back off and read "Tennis Star" again. Again... just so great!
Thank you for telling Cindy and Mitch's story. These characters are so perfectly drawn that they feel like real people. It was such a joy to watch their relationship unfold. I will be eagerly awaiting your next efforts, whenever they arrive.
This + Tennis Star are two of my favorite series on this site (even though I HATE how much emotion you can pull from me :) ). I love the authentic feelings of love, loss, anxiety and triumph that you infuse in your characters. I love that they feel as real as they do and that I find myself hoping they have happy lives and imagining those lives. Thank you for being awesome and sharing these with us.
I actually started crying on the end. One of the best stories that I have read on this site. Thanks
I am a hopeless romantic so is it any wonder that I love your stories — heartwarming stories not without angst and pain, but also stories that resonate and help us learn/understand/feel — teaching moments if you will. And enjoy the way you interconnect some of your stories, which brings back memories and encourages me to revisit other relationships you’ve crafted. Looking forward to meeting other women from your wonderful imagination not only because of your romantic storylines but also because of the uniqueness of each of the characters you introduce to us.
This was BEAUTIFUL! When she was coming out to her dad, I braced myself for a bittersweet ending. Thank you for making it just a sweet ending!
I like to comment on stories that I've enjoyed and this is one of the best. Your character building and story telling are great, your sex scenes are almost lyrical in their wording, and you write with emotional depth. But I have to agree with the anonymous comment below in that I felt the 'twenty years later' happy ever after segment just wasn't needed and, if I'm honest detracted a little from the rest of the story. If Hope and John are more than a footnote then perhaps they deserve their own story at some point in the future, but it just felt a bit rushed tacking them onto the end of this story. Cindy had already overcome her challenge and got her future with Mitch and that, I think, would have been the better place to stop. But that's just my feedback. It didn't stop me giving you a well deserved 5 stars.
Absolutely loved this story and can’t wait for the next one. I truly am a huge fan. Great job!
Perfect! Simply perfect! The vows they shared were beautiful and encompassed the their whole relationship. The ending was wonderful, with a very creative twist, bringing all the characters together. Although this concludes the Mitch/Cindy story, I know I’ll be back to reread often.
"And now here's a shot of Hope's box" !!!! That's a little racy for coverage of Wimbledon,. innit? Or would that be UNcoverage...what are tennis togs like in the future?
Teasing aside, beautifully done as always. Thank you so much!
It is a beautiful series and shows true love as it should be. Just remember if it is worth fighting for it is definetly worth it and Mitch fought hard.
TheDevilyou know
Simply amazing characters, story, and writing! Can't wait for your next project
Wimbledon, huh? Not too much hutzpa there is there. Wonderful story and a great conclusion, bringing every body together again. Give them all my love.
Bravo! It has been an awfully long since a story left me so torn between being happy for the characters and the fact that this is it, the inevitable end of a journey we shared to get here. And to make the matter even more complex you added an epilogue that actually makes sense, one that complements the story and ties the whole universe together (I count The Tennis Star as a prequel to this). I am immensely grateful to you for writing this masterpiece, for the involvement of personal growth of characters, for addressing the social questions, for making the loving scenes so real-life-like, for including humour and banter in just the right moments, and finally for staying true to your style.
A clear 5* with high hopes and expectations for your next work.
The sad thing about unpleasant bigots like Cindy's father is that most of them don't recognise that they are unpleasant bigots; whether "Christians", atheists or whatever, they consider themselves to be the righteous occupants of the moral high ground. I wonder how many of them have really taken notice of Christ's teachings about love, tolerance and forgiveness. Another excellent story, JC. Congratulations all round.
What a spectacular ending for Cindy & Mitch's story! The tiny epilogue at the end is everything I was hoping it would be and then some. Your works are always filled with such beautiful, kind, and generous characters, and they are always a joy to read. No doubt I will be re-reading this story dozens of times--as I have all your others!
Genuinely outstanding from start to finish.
Every aspect of the story rang true and plausible, and made the characters all feel so realistic, it was almost as though the reader had personally been introduced to them individually.
Another triumph for you and I actually think this is your best work so far, and given the quality of your other stories, that is quite an achievement.
Congratulations, and please keep writing for us.
One side note before I forget. I have recently begun to rewatch Buffy on Amazon, and I`d forgotten just how bad Kendras Jamaican/Irish/Scottish accent was!!
Well …. The conclusion has outdone even my wildest hopes and dreams… i ask for a happy ending and this surpasses that… thank you very much
Carrie…. Need to hear about her realizing she’s gay. That would be a good story. I’m disappointed this story has ended. I loved their love for each other.
Well you’ve done it, you have me crying. Little teary at the wedding, but the epilogue really did it. I loved this story, thank you so much. Now I better go check out Carrie's story that Cindy has been referring to!
Truly incredible, heartwarming, puddle upping, erotic to the max, and made me want to hurt a certain someone at times. Proves that many go with what they are taught growing up rather than thinking for themselves, and massive kudos to Cindy for being able to see the light! I appreciated the epilogue as I always wonder how the characters lives evolved over time. I’m only sorry Cindys Mom never contacted her and the younger sister bowed to the pressure. The story made my heart ache for so many gay kids round the world going through hell because so many find hate preferable to love. You never disappoint me
A beautiful end to a beautiful story. Thank you for sharing this with the rest of us. We are in your debt.
Can I give it more than 5 stars? Everything you write draws me back to reread over and over. I eagerly await your next project.
Great story Always impressed with authors who can create a universe of characters that compel the reader to follow them. This was your first story I read of all you had written and it made me want to read all the others, which I did and do. Five stars for sure only one small item Senior day Cindy’s brother and sister in law should have been there or at least a quick note as to their unavailability. Her being alone without explanation was very disconcerting. Loved the tie up of Carrie and Ivyna story which for me was the follow up to this love story. Your a Great writer thank you for sharing your gift
I absolutely love your stories. I am devastated that this one is over. I cannot wait for what you put out in the future!!!
Wow. That was an amazing series, as always. P.S. thank you for the update on Carrie and Iryna.
This was a beautiful series, and I just want to say, as an autistic person, I got an autistic vibe from Cindy at certain points throughout the story, and greatly appreciated and related to her character because of it.
Pure. Dead. Brilliant. You have shown again that you're one of the best writers on this site. Thank you for the unexpected ending and closing the open question at the end of Tennis Star. Can't wait to read your next work
WOW! I certainly didn't see that ending coming; it was perfect. Thank you for all of your stories. I am sad that this is the end of Mitch, Cindy, Carrie, and Iryna but I know they will be here waiting for me to read and re-read again and again and I will enjoy them as much as I did the first time.
You are an amazingly talented writer. I thoroughly enjoyed this story. Thank you for the hours of entertainment you provided by sharing with us. Your hard work is appreciated by many readers on this site.
Wonderful! I am a straight guy. I really enjoyed reading Cindy and Mitch’s story. Looking forward to reading your other work now.
OK, this is probably one of the most beautiful stories I have read so far in Literotica. I can only hope that there are many more from JCMcNeilly that we will be graced with in the future. I used to think that "Hero Worship" could not be topped but, apparently, I was wrong...
Loved the series and reduced to tears again. Sorry not good at analysis just know what I like and want to thank the wonderful people like you who write these stories.
Fantastic. Such a good story teller. Obviously now we have to wait for your next project!
Beautiful (and sexy) romances, lovely characters, drama, and most importantly happy endings!!
Thank you.
So many tears shed reading this, both of joy and of sadness. You tell such amazing stories and I feel like I know every one of your characters. Cindy and Mitch's promises were so incredibly beautiful and I loved seeing Carrie and Iryna again. Thank you so much for sharing your stories with us here, you are one of many that make this community what it is!!.
I can't wait to read your next works!
Thank you for this great story. So happy for how you ended it with the future view of how the kids ended up involved in tennis like their parents, and strong in their relationship with their parents, unlike Cindy's situation. Would have liked to have known if Cindy's parents ever softened up and became rational, but I guess that would be too much to ask.
i didn’t come on this site to cry, but this had me in tears. i am gay, so gay and i just want the love they have :,)
Love the story. Would of love to see Cindy and her mom come together I was hoping
Don't know what made me read such a long first chapter ... after having abolished Tennis Start after two chapters.
But this story really fetched me. So much that I also finished Tennis Star and repeated to read chapter 1 of this.
Your conversations are believable, intelligent and - I miss this point in the comments as far as I can see - very funny!
I think the epilogue is as superfluous as the one in Harry Potter. You never know how a relationship wears out after years. But the development of Mitch and Cindy's love will be one of the deepest and dearest memories I will have from reading on Literotica.
I wish I could give this whole series more than five stars. Superb story and writing. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Wow. You are the first writer I've come across who is writing realistic, well-written, plot line driven lesbian romance!! Thank you so much! I love all of your stories. Please please keep posting!
I loved so much about this story. The depth of the relationship you explored between Mitch and Cindy and the fact it is such a healthy relationship are topmost! Thank you for creating stories of healthy relationships and healing. I can't wait for the next one.
I'm worried about Cindy's mom and sister. I mean Charlotte not inviting her sister to her wedding even though they used to have a good relationship doesn't sound good at all.
Ps. I loved that Iryna made it to no1!
Holy written wonder Batman! I am so happy to have read this and cannot express my gratitude for having been able to experience this amazing story. Thank you immensely. I beg you to never let this gift go and keep writing because your work is beautiful. I'll be sure to keep an eye out for more.
There are quite a lot of things that I could say about this, but I think I'm going to limit myself to: it's a beautiful story; their wedding vows made me cry.
As a ally I really felt this. And to be honest I used a few tissues on each section.
Great, Fantastic, outstanding, do not give it justice. You had me hooked after the first few chapters. Well done. I 💘 it
thank you at times i could not read the words fast enough ill be looking for your next stories be happy and safe a fan shayne
"If God doesn't want me to be happy, especially in an innocent, mutually healthy relationship, then he's not worth worshipping. " I went through an entire box of kleenex reading that scene, it hit home so very hard for me. So painful, so true, but so proud of Cindy, and Mitch. I loved the epilogue, to have a happily ever after for the family they created just made my heart burst. And also because there just isn't enough happily-ever-afters out there. Thank you JC, truly, just...all the feels for this 💜💜💜
Once again, you've written a masterpiece that i loved. I love the various characters we get to revisit. And i always look out for your stories. Thank you for taking the time to write them or us.
One of the best things I've ever read on Literotica or anywhere else. I wouldn't change a thing.
Outstanding. I cried. I laughed. Also anger at Carrie's parents. Is this as good as The Tennis Star? I can absolutely say yes. Sad it's all over but no doubt I'll be reading this many times as like The Tennis Star. Very well done. 5*s is definitely not enough.
The coming out scene made ma cry so much. The whole story was amazing, I'm so grateful to have found it. Best of luck for the rest !
You continue to warm my heart and bring out all emotions with every story. You are by far my favorite author and I look forward to whatever you share with us next.
A series by JCMcNeilly and I knew it would be great. I really liked the connection with the series 'A tennis star'.
This story falls under my "James Bond" rule. It's not particularly believable, but it's beautifully written, and i can choose to believe it anyway, if i damn well please...and I do. It's really only tangentially an erotic story (though the sex is grand). It's a strong love story.
I'm not crying. You're crying.
Nice story.
You just had to make me cry. It reminds me how lucky I am having my partner in my life and just 2 weeks from our own marriage. Thank you for writing this wonderful love story.
Beautiful. Can't describe how grateful I am that I've come across this wonderful story.
Very nice, but the "decades later, AT WIMBLEDON!" scene is too much. You've done much better.
Thank you for another story with real characters and issues. I really enjoy your work!