All Comments on 'Cuckolded by my Dream Girl'
by Generouslover124
- 26 Comments
NEVER continue this trash. In the first place, you're in the wrong category. Secondly, he's NOT a cuckold (look up the definition). And thirdly, this was awful writing.
My dream girl I’m chasing cuckolds me - then she is not your dream girl you moron
I would have watched, dropped a load on her head and walked out the door forever.
better ending: Without speaking I got up slapped Jill so hard she saw stars, kicked James in the balls and walked out the door never seeing the slut whore again.
Dumb. By the way, cuckolding occurs between married people, not boyfriend/girlfriend. Why is it fools like you think writing a cheating humiliation story is the way to introduce yourself. I'll add your name on the pile of those to ignore.
First time poster and you already hit the trifecta: poorly written, horrible storyline/characters, and posted in the wrong category.
Where to start? An ill composed mix of a"my dreamgirl was a bitch" and "OMG I realized I'm a cuck" stories. It makes no sense. She tells him he could never get a girl like her and yet she explains that a cuck is a person whose partner gets fucked by a bull. Would this not imply that he is her partner, when she calls him a cuck? The characters are flat, the action uninspiring.
dont bother...they are not even in a realtionship, so it aint cucking, just a sad wimpy dude torturing himself by watching this.
Another mentally ill, self-loathing doormat story. {yawwwn} For a first story, try writing something with general appeal that hasn't been written 5-billion times before. These stories are like reading the men's room walls.
Eh, it was short, I prefer longer stories. Could use more build up, before the cuckolding. Tease it out more.
Ask on here for editing advise.
You had the courage to submit a story, and let people judge. I bet all those anonymous posters never had the courage to submit anything and they crap all over you. Don't give up, polish this up, see what works from others and try, try again.
Ignore the cuck haters and keep writing. If your story had one main weakness it was that the reader wasn't convinced that he was actually in a real relationship with Jill. So, the cuckolding didn't ring quite true - he appeared to be just one of many men who wanted to date her. If we had been convinced that he was in an onging relationship with Jill, then the so-called 'cuckolding' would have stuck.
My wife and I could relate to the theme of your story. After I proposed marriage to her, she set up an evening similar to what went down in your story. She wanted to be convinced that I would be okay with having a wife that fucked other men. Also, she wanted to see if I would become excited seeing her fuck another man. Finally, she wanted to see if I could eagerly lick another man's cum out of her pussy. I passed the test with flying colors and we got married.
Write another chapter showing Jill and him bonding around this cuckold experience. Your sex scene was fine, you just needed more of a relationship between them.
Thank it's a start, as my wife and I, started. But we are married then for my (wish) she would fuck another, first she said that's bedroom talk, then one day came up, and she find out I was happy.
Okay. (if you like cuck stories). Don't think a person could transform into a willing cuck quite so quickly as this story progresses. I think most normal men would walk out once Jill proclaims "you could never get someone like me . . ." In any event, good editing, didn't notice any obvious errors. However, I hate stories that end with "to be continued" and then there is never any continuation.