All Comments on 'Decorating Donna Pt. 03'

I must admit I’m slightly disappointed, that you didn’t go further and for longer with the jewellery and bondage theme before you ended it.

To me it was slightly anticlimactic, it is fantasy after all and you brought a little bit too much realism back into it.

Maybe in a future project you could build on the public bondage aspect but make it more hidden and less obtrusive so that she becomes more and more helpless and restrained while at the same time appearing normal to anyone looking at her... but that may not be interested enough for you, you need to write what you like.

I do hope you don’t mind my criticism, it isn’t meant in a bad way, I just feel like a kid that has been given vegetables instead of chocolate.

I love your writing style and would happily read this story again I just feel the end let it down.

I appreciate the feedback. I’m afraid I find that a story line runs its course, and I can take it no further. I also find that although I develop an outline before I start, I’m all too often hung up for an interesting ending (as I implied at the end of this one – I’m unsatisfied with ‘happily ever after’,) Alas, I’m no mystery writer, ready with a fascinating, surprise twist to finish off my tales.

I do write based on my collection of favorite, personal fantasies, and perhaps I’ll build another one involving public bondage – no promises, though…

I’m a firm believer of realism in most of my fantasies, if it’s realistic then it’s more than just a fantasy, it changes from an impossible fantasy to a highly improbable but still achievable fantasy. The other kind of Impossible fantasies are still fine and again for preference they tend to be alt reality/ sci-fi/ supernatural/ dystopian based fantasies.

For me the conclusion of your story brought your story from a mildly erotic horror story to something more mainstream in terms of kink. When you’ve actually lived in real life something that others write about as their erotic fantasy it give an entirely different perspective to stories on this website.

As a piece of writing it’s very good, you’ve set the scene, given various POV scenes and created relatable characters that reader can empathise with. I didn’t read chapter 2 because it really isn’t my kind of thing but I decided to skim the end of this chapter to see how things turned out. It was such a massive change of direction and tone that I decided to read the entirety of this chapter. The change in plot line made the entire story so much more plausible. It’s still not my kink but best of luck with your writing.

Tess (UK)

On page 2 you had the name Brooke in your story. It doesn't sem to belong