- Romance
- Going Home
- Page 4
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Click hereKatherine's two children from her former marriage flourished in their new environment and both ended up graduating from top schools. Both ultimately returned after experiencing life outside the valley with new spouses in tow, never to leave again. Katherine and Walter occasionally made trips away from the area to see friends and family but if truth be told, could not wait to get home. Katherine continued to teach until mandatory retirement; Walter actually retired a couple of years before he would have had to do so staying on with the company in a consulting role part time.
As the years passed he would periodically pull off on the other side of the long river bridge and talk to Dennis. He would thank him for having been a good friend; he would tell him how much everyone missed him still. He would tell him how much he loved the woman that they had both loved and married and how proud they both could be of Dennis' children. Walter would then drive the twenty minutes to his little piece of hillside and hug the still fetching colleen who had stolen his heart so many years ago. She would feel his tears on her shoulder and smile and hug him even tighter and tell him what a lucky little girl she was. They would banter about who was luckier and if the children weren't in sight he would sneak a hand down the back of her dress. She would protest even as she found his growing arousal with her hands and more often than not dinner would be delayed.
- COMMENTS
Great premise, poor structure. You were kind of all over the place. Nonetheless, it was still decent. I've definitely read worse.
I like the overall premise for the story, but the structure of the events seems out of sequence. It felt like he should be dealing with business issues and then gradually build up to the personal relationship. In this, he shows up on her doorstep and they're instantly engaged. I felt like I blinked during the story and missed a lot.
Even after reading the story plenty of times, it’s one of my favourite story on LIT. Don’t bother small errors, we can fill the gaps. Thank you Dinsmore!
A good story but an editor would have easily picked up half a dozen errors and half a dozen cases where a poor choice of words led to ambiguity.
Re inka2222.
Speaking only for men here coz even after 47 years of happy marriage I still have absolutely no idea what makes women tick, or what motivates them. Many teenagers do get seriously heartbroken and hurt by their first love. Out of misguided loyalty they stay faithful to their girlfriend, well their memory of their girlfriend, and then it becomes a habit and just sticks around until it is broken.
I was deeply madly in forever love when I was 15. You know, we actually invented "being in love". No one in all of creation had ever been in love like we two were. We were forcibly separated by circumstances beyond our control. I was 24 before I allowed myself back into the dating pool. In my foolish immature mind (read teenage male mind) I was sure I was remaining faithful to my girlfriend, and rejected all offers or advances by the fairer sex and actively resented the girls for trying to spoil the integrity of the love I had for my girlfriend.
Then this frame of mind and course of actions just became a habitual and automatic response.
Until I met my wife, obviously.
I re-read your story again after about a year and it was even better than the first time. I had several heart tugs and near-tear events. Thanks again for a great story.
I double dog rare the author to write the opposite story. A girl waits 20 years for a guy who thought she wasn't a marriage material in school, makes a real gem of herself, then meets him 20 years later and marries him as a single father helping him raise someone else's kids.
1 star. Not strictly speaking a slam on the author or the story quality itself, just the fact that she's just like all the other women, when a man is young and amazing she ignors him unless he's a literal prince with family money and great looks and fame; then when he spends 20 years making something out of himself, through his own blood sweat and tears, NOW she's suddenly interested in his paying for and raising the prince's offspring. She doesn't deserve him. And the whole garbage about loving her for 20 years is just that, garbage. He's described as so awesome, there's no way he couldn't meet another woman he'd be able to love in all this time.
A real life fairytale. You will want to read in again and again.
The Hoary Cleric
What a wonderful story. Local guy goes away, does good and returns to do good for his home town.
Good story, but everything is going just too quick and too well. No conflict. She is ready for new love when he comes. Her husband killed himself several years ago. All the necessary key personal moved the area before needed and waiting for his job proposal. It's just too much.
A great well-written story. The fairy-tale plot and the lack of conflict are serious flaws, but it's hard to criticize such a well written and feel-good story. I look forward to reading some of your other work.
It was a good story but it felt rushed. So many time skips, don't really get to hear about his children or his life afterwards. Just
Beautiful and wonderful romantic story. Love it very much. Definitely a five star rating. 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟