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All Comments on 'Mind Control Adventures Ch. 01'
by WeirdoBus
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This is the very-first-ever story. Better get some proof-reading or use the google’s correction before the upload.
Based on the story, it was really rushed.. scenes can be perfect if it’s not rushed.
Can I ask in what way was it poorly written? I am new to this. I’ll be sure to improve and improve on my writing. I just need to know what it is I need to improve on.
You are right it was rushed. I will try and improve on my writing. Thanks for the criticism.
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I’ve read quite a few of literotica stories before, and absolutely hated what route they took. Im going to do the same thing by writing my own.
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