All Comments on 'Twice as Nice'

I liked the scenario well-enough, but the writing really lost me. Not only all the out-there slang in the dialogue, but the constant weird synonyms and descriptions. "Poop shoot", "fart box"? Not really sexy to me.

Maybe it won't bother other people, but I'd suggest to go with a more subdued type of writing.

How many Neville's and Nigel's are there?

You need to go back and reread this to yourself and play spot the problems or have someone read this and help you edit this to a more coherent story.

Maybe should have been in the gay category and not the transgender/crossdresser one. Disappointing