We Don't Have To Do This

We Don't Have to Do This

This short little story is written in an unusual format with nearly all dialog and primarily in reverse chronological order. I appreciate any comments as to the story and the format.

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We don't have to do this,

We don't have to say good-bye.

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"Mr. and Mrs. Wilson, I believe our session of mediation has been successful," said Judge Howe via Zoom to the two clients who were located in separate rooms with their attorneys. "I will write up a document outlining your agreement and bring it to you in about an hour. Feel free to get up, stretch your legs and grab a beverage."

"Uh, Sir, uh, Your Honor, would it be OK if I were to visit with my wife now that the agreement has been made?"

"Mr. Wilson, please, no need to call me 'Your Honor' since I'm now retired and doing mediation part-time to help folks like you. As to visiting your wife, that's up to your attorneys and to her."

"Thank you." With a questioning look, he turned to his attorney Mr. Dewey who immediately muted the microphone.

"Sure, if you want to spend time with her, that's fine, but don't try to change anything in this agreement. And don't get in a fight! Howe won't like it!"

"No, I won't. I'd like to spend a few minutes with her, though," Brad said.

"Mr. Cheatham," asked Dewey on the unmuted screen, "Is your client willing to meet with mine?"

After a few seconds of watching his wife and her attorney speak to each other on their muted screen, Mr. Cheatham turned off the mute and answered, "That would be fine. I assume your client knows not to discuss this agreement at all and to keep things civil."

"He understands. Look, since this is my office and it's late, they can use my conference room right across the hall from you. I'll send Mr. Wilson over there."

"Thank you."

The door was partway open when Brad arrived at the conference room. He eased it open in time to see his beautiful, soon-to-be ex-wife Suzanne staring out of the windows at the city below. He cleared his throat. "Uh, Hi."

"Hello to you. What'd you want to talk about?"

"Honestly, I wanted to know how you're doing."

"Do you really care?"

"Actually, I do. A lot. We have a long history together and I still care about you."

"Hmm. Well, since you ask, I'm OK," she said using little rabbit ears, "All things considered. You?"

"Numb. I feel numb."

"You're not pissed, anymore?"

"Ah, nope. Not pissed. Just numb. Also, I'm sad."

"Sad?" she exclaimed with a bit of disbelief in her voice.

"Yeah, sad. Sad we have ended up this way. Not what I expected in my life, especially after we first met and got married."

"Yeah, me neither, but it is what it is."

"What happened, Suze, what happened, actually?"

"Are you serious? You want to rehash the whole thing? All the arguments?"

"No! No, the arguments were a symptom of something deeper. I wonder what that something was."

"I don't think I need to remind you of that June party..."

"I know, I know I fucked up at the party. But there was something bigger going on long before then. What do you think it was?"

"Do they have any booze in here?" she asked with a chuckle in her voice.

"Lemme check. Oh, look, here's a cabinet with some nice scotch and a fridge with chilled half-bottles of wine."

"Grab a scotch and I'll open the wine."

"You sure we should?"

"With what they've charged me and no doubt you, they can afford it," she laughed.

After they had poured their drinks and silently toasted each other, she looked at her husband with a sober face and said, "I don't know. I honestly don't know what happened."

"Things were going so well and then it all fell apart."

"I, uh, I kinda think a lot of it was simple, god-awful stress. You were working hard trying to make a decent living, pulling long hours, I was trying to work my parttime art job and take care of the kids and keep the house going. Maybe it was all too much."

"Covid didn't help, did it?"

"No, God no! Suddenly we were stuck in the same house for days on end and we never had time to relax. The kids were cranky and still needed to be taught which added even more to my plate and even to yours. And they were constantly bugging both of us when we tried to work but I don't blame them at all; it was tough on them as well. Trying to work remotely without killing each other was hard enough as it was without all the other baggage."

"And you missed your spa days with the girls."

"And you your fishing trips with Ben and Hal. Maybe we both needed time to get away from each other even for a few hours, to decompress. And we couldn't..."

"Not stuck in a quarantine, we couldn't. Then my getting laid off. Shit piled on top of more shit and it seemed we couldn't get past it."

"Yeah, and even though you got a new job, once my anger hardened, well, I guess it was pretty much over by that time."

"Yeah, I guess it was," he paused waiting for a response and not getting one, he went on, "Say, can you remember when was the last time we, you and I, really had fun? You know, total fun, total relaxation without the kids?"

"That's easy. The week at the cabin. When was it? Eighteen? Seventeen?"

"Twenty nineteen, actually. It was a great week, well, six days, I guess."

"I'll never be able to thank your folks enough for coming down and insisting we leave the kids with them and go to the cabin," she said.

"Yeah, it was a great offer. Remember the third, or was it the second night?"

"How could I forget it? We were relaxed, had been lazy all day and after dinner and a second glass of wine you, well you had your way with me. I've always wondered where that came from, anyway."

"I don't know. I guess you looked so sexy in a shy, almost embarrassed way and I decided to take over."

"You threw me on the bed like a sack of potatoes! And then you ripped my clothes off. That bra was expensive, dammit."

"Would you trade that night for a bra?" he laughed.

"Well, no. But still..."

"I don't remember the bra, quite frankly. I just remember when you looked at me with a tiny bit of fear in your eyes before I headed down south."

"Yeah, and that night your tongue was amaaazing! I could feel every little bump on your tongue as it slowly slid over my supersensitive clit. You didn't rush it and each lick seemed to last foreeever! You did everything in your power to give me pleasure 'n' I don't think I've ever come so hard and so often as I did that night."

"God, it was so fun, no, it was so exciting to watch you out of control. I loved watching the little splotchy rash you get right before you came. I could tease you and watch it spread, ease off and it would recede only to spread again as I went to town. Fascinating!"

"You should have been on my side. It was so good as to be almost, almost, mind you, painful. I only hope I was able to return the favor a little."

"Suze, that blow job was the most phenomenal one ever imaginable and when you slid your finger in the backdoor, oh shit, I thought I'd died and gone to heaven."

"Yeah," she giggled before going on, "I had recently read in Cosmo guys like getting their prostates rubbed and I thought I'd try it."

"I guess it was the rubbing, the taboo nature of it all and, of course, your tongue. It took me a long time to come back to earth after that."

"And that night led to the next three phenomenal nights. We were sex maniacs, weren't we?"

"Yeah. I never thought I'd take you with you bent over the kitchen counter with me being so much taller than you."

"Yeah, but once you dropped me on the counter and my feet were hanging off the floor, well I guess I was at the right height. And kinda helpless, too."

"And wet! Jeez you were so damn wet."

"I'd been thinking about sex all afternoon when we were sunbathing."

"Topless! I might add. Made me horny all day long."

"These old boobs? Saggy and all?"

"They're not saggy! They were sexy as all get out. Still are."

"Really? You're not just saying that, are you?"

"Yes, really. Suze, in spite of all this, you know, what we're going through, I think you are the sexiest thing alive."

"Wow," she whispered. After a minute, she went on, "I think you're pretty hot, too."

"You're the sexiest thing alive and I'm just 'pretty hot'? God, a guy can't get a break here," he laughed.

"Oh, Brad, you know what I mean. Shit, you're still in shape, no 'Dad bod' for you. You'll get yourself someone new pretty quick, mark my words."

There was a long pause while Brad eyed at his wife with a stunned look on his face. "I, uh, I can't even think about that kind of shit, right now."

"But we're getting divorced and someday you'll find someone and, well, this will all fade in the past."

"You thinking you'll meet someone...?"

"I don't know. I quit the pill and I know I'm not going looking anytime soon."

"Me neither. I think the kids'll need a lot of time to absorb this and only when things have settled down could I ever think about looking around. And I know I'll never find someone as sexy and well put together as you."

"Brad, do you mean that? Honestly? After all we've gone through lately and you still believe that? With the fights and you moving out and doing the lawyer thing?"

"Yes, I mean it. I truly do. You know, I still love you in spite of everything."

"That makes me feel a tiny bit better, I guess."

"Hey, not counting the time at the cabin, what was the best thing about the years since the kids were born? Between us, I mean?" he asked.

"Obviously, the kids were the absolute best thing. We've got great kids, know that?"

"Yeah, they are. I hope we're not fucking them up for life by splitting."

"I don't think we are. They've got good heads on their shoulders and our agreement will have us both in their lives. They'll be seeing both of us regularly."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I know, but still..."

"Anyway, you were asking about the best thing since the kids were born. I know what it was."

"What?"

"Our trip out west. Bryce Canyon. Remember the hike into the canyon?" he asked.

"Yeah. Beautiful. And I think for the first time they realized what nature could offer. And that night after they sacked out...remember?"

"Remember? It's in my spank bank to this day."

"You sicko," she laughed.

"I can't forget how sexy you were as you slipped off your boots. Your shorts were fairly loose and I could see all the way to the promised land and you were going commando! And you made damn sure I knew it."

"Yeah, then I made you pay, didn't I?"

"Making me crawl on my knees to you and kiss your toes! That was flat out mean."

"Oh, you loved it and you know you did, especially when I let you kiss up my legs."

"And in a weird way, your female scent mixed with your sweat was the most erotic assault on my nose I'd ever had. And you tasted earthy, raw, real."

"I wouldn't remember that, not after you fried my brain with three O's right in a row."

"Yeah, you seemed to be enjoying yourself," he chuckled.

"You bet. But I remember your being well taken care of, too."

"You are the champion cowgirl of all time, in my book. And watching you rub one out while you rode me, oooh, how could I ever forget that?"

"You like watching me masturbate, don't you?"

"God, yes. So damn sexy."

"Lucky we pulled on some jams before we fell asleep. Remember Kyle popping in at, what was it, six a.m.?"

"Yeah, but he and Jules were excited to see more desert stuff and I can't blame them. And Kyle still claims he's going to be a geologist."

"That was a great trip, probably the best ever. Everything was in tune, the kids behaved, the weather was fabulous."

"As was the sex!" he exclaimed.

"Yeah. As was the sex."

How about the trip to Disney World? That was nice, too."

"Yeah, they were too young for the good rides but they mostly enjoyed themselves."

"There was that one meltdown Julie had after we took her on the Speedway, I think that's what is was called."

"Oh, yeah, that's right! She wanted to steer the car but was too little to turn the wheel. She got so pissed she started yelling."

"I remember picking her up as soon as we got back to the end of the track and running her out front and there was a demo car sitting there, just like we'd been in, and she was happy as a clam sitting there turning the wheel," he said.

"Yeah, until that bitch with the older boy started yelling at her it was his turn. Imagine, a stranger yelling at a two-year old!"

"And you gave her a candy bar to calm her down and a crow flew right up to her and stole the candy bar!"

"Oh, God, her crying lasted forever, it seemed. It's funny now but the poor kid, I think she learned at age two that life can be unfair," she added.

"And If I ever have to listen to It's a Small World After All one more time, I'm gonna barf," he chuckled.

"Yeah, it was an awful ear worm which took me weeks to get rid of."

After a few minutes pause, he asked, "Say, remember those years right around when the kids were born?"

"No! I can't remember a thing after Kyle was born! I had an eighteen-month-old and a newborn. How was I able to remember anything, sleep deprived as I was?"

"Yeah, that was pretty damn stressful. I only wish I could have been home a little more."

"That would have been nice but your work..."

"I could have, no, I should have demanded some time off."

"But you were up for a big promotion which would help pay for the kids. It was what it was."

"Yeah, I guess, but I still feel guilty."

"Don't, please don't. We survived it intact."

"Which makes our current situation all the more fucked up," he added.

"Our current situation is different but please remember, we made it through those two years with the babies OK."

"Yeah, I guess we did. We sure learned condoms aren't a hundred percent, didn't we?"

"Uh-uh, but I wouldn't trade Kyle for anything. He's a great kid, just like Julie."

"Did I ever tell you what happened right after you gave birth to Julie?"

"No."

"You had a rough pregnancy and the docs were worried you'd lose her. And finally on the day you delivered I don't think you realized how tough the birth was."

"You shit!" she laughed, "I was the one pushing!"

"I know. I know, but the doc was sweating and looking real nervous for about five or ten minutes there near the end. I think she was the most relieved one in the room when Julie popped out and started crying. And when the pediatrician said everything looked normal, I damn near passed out."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Once she was on your breast I snuck out and called my sister. I must have sobbed for five minutes; the relief was so great."

"I had no idea."

"Suze, I was so fuckin' proud of you and what you had gone through like a trooper and to have such great results. I still get a little emotional thinking about it."

Suzanne reached over and gave his hand a little squeeze. "It all worked out, though, didn't it?"

"Yup. Good kids. At least something good has come out of our relationship."

"Now wait a second. There were other good things, I mean, we had some really good times, some wonderful memories. I want to concentrate on them and try to get past the recent anger and hurt," she said.

"Me, too, but it's hard to remember those times when the recent fights are still ringing in my ears."

"Then we have to think harder. What about the weekend on our fifth anniversary?"

"Fifth anniversary?"

"Yeah, you know," she said, "We closed the door, turned off the phones and email and stayed in bed the whole weekend."

"Oh, yeah, you're right. It was pretty special. I thought after that weekend we'd be together forever," he murmured.

"Why?"

"It was way beyond sex, though the sex was phenomenal. No, it was the time when I felt so close to you, almost like we were melted together or something."

"You felt that way? I did too. I remember clinging to you during one round and thinking this was the ultimate inlove making and not simply screwing."

"Yeah, 's pretty wild."

"Or our first anniversary. Remember that one?" she asked.

"Yeah! I'd just gotten my first big raise and you sold your first big piece of artwork. We went to the airport with our passports and a small suitcase and asked the gal at the counter to set us up for the most exotic place they flew to."

"And she had a late cancellation for Tahiti! And we went, just like that!" she recalled.

"Six crazy days and when we came back, no one believed us when we told them where we'd been."

"And that little stand-alone cabana, or whatever they were called. Open windows, soft breezes right off the water. Felt like we were making love in the outdoors."

"We practically were, and if you remember, we did one night down on the beach," he chuckled.

"I'm surprised we weren't caught."

"I bet they ignore the beaches at night so they don't have to deal with any embarrassing situations."

"I guess they do, probably."

"I liked that trip even more than our honeymoon."

"Oh? Why?"

"I knew I had wanted to marry you and was so glad when you said 'yes'..."

"Are you kidding? There was no way I'd turn you down."

"Well, anyway, on the honeymoon I found myself a few times suddenly almost in a panic. I kept wondering what I'd just done and worrying if I'd made the right decision."

"Of course, you made the right decision, Brad."

"Well, yeah, I guess. But....look at us now."

"That was then and this is now. At that time, it was the right decision and it will always have been the right decision. Even though we're splitting, I wouldn't trade one minute of our time together."

"Even these last eight months?"

"Well, you know what I mean. I mean the time up until recently, I wouldn't trade it at all."

"When did you first know you wanted to marry me? When I proposed?"

"Heck no. I knew it way before then. I was getting impatient for you to ask. I even thought about asking you, truth be told."

"Did you? That would have freaked me out."

"Yeah, it would have. Anyway, I knew I wanted to marry you right after we started having sex."

"I was that good, huh?" he laughed.

"Oh, you were good. Still are. But I felt such an emotional bonding with you I realized I wanted that all the time."

"Hmm. I had no idea."

"You sure didn't. Like I said, I almost had to ask you to marry me."

"I do remember our first time together. Do you?"

"Yeah, I sure do."

"You were so sexy in that little black dress and those heels."

"My FMPs?"

"Huh?"

"My Fuck Me Pumps!"

"Oh, I always called them CFMs. Come Fuck Me's. Anyway, dancing with you was so erotic."

"Yeah, I could tell!" she giggled.

"I was so embarrassed you could feel me!"

"Why? That was the first time I knew, absolutely knew, you were into me. I loved it."

"And you kept holding me close to you, rubbing up against me. I couldn't break or everyone would have known."

"That was part of my evil plan," she laughed, "Get you so excited you would forget about all the other girls."

"I had forgotten about them long before that night."

"Really? You never told me."

"Maybe not. But once we left the dance, walking you back to your place with my arm around you was the most wonderful thing. And you leaned up against me a little. I figured you were giving me a signal..."

"I was and I'm glad you got it."

"Back at your place you told me your roomie was gone for the weekend."

"Another signal," she chuckled.

"And you invited me in..."

"Those signals just kept flyin'."

"And the wine..."

"To loosen you up."

"And your kisses. You started off with little ones, then they deepened. Your lips were so damn sexy. Still are, by the way. Anyway, when you started teasing me with your tongue I figured we were in for some making out."