All Comments on 'Bankrupt Ch. 03'

these just keep on getting better

Can alter your personality and make you feel anything, why question what's happening? Sure you can fight it but if the chips can make a straight man suck another man off in public then you have no choice in what you do. The chips can make you commit a robbery, rape a child, assassinate a world leader, murder your parents, have sex with a corpse...you have no free will and if your master commands you to stop breathing, you have no choice but to do that...so again, why question what's happening? It's evident that you have no free will and are simply a plaything for your owner.

I'm sure the author would state that an underaged person can't be chipped or there are safeguards to prevent illegal activities but honestly, we have laws like that now and still there is rape, child abuse, assault, murder, etc etc. And I have no doubt there are very sick individuals who would abuse the chips by implanting them in children.

I say this because you have a good story but have created a world with unintended consequences and you have artificially constrained them because of the confines of your story, not because it makes sense or fits.

i get that she wants to find a way to free herself, it makes for a really interesting plot. but it would be nice if she actually had some scenes with victor. the first episode that you wrote was super hot and made me look forward to the sequel. the last two episodes have had pretty much zero interaction with him, only mentioning that things have happened. would really love it if you included some of those incounters

I am very impressed with this story as it is using the erotica as an important plot device, but not pandering to the lowest common denominator. Having her desire to escape continue to exist alongside her chipped desire to serve brings the "literature" into this "literotica" story.

Whackadoodle's observations are interesting points however. Perhaps as the research continues our heroine will discover the safeguards put into place to prevent crime are an avenue of resistance and escape.

Looking forward to more.

I really like the developing romance and submission relationship between the girls. It was also good to see victor make a return. I wish the victor scene had been a little longer, but the parts that were there are great.

This story has a really interesting plot. It could do with a little more attention on the sex scenes, but it doesn't need much more. I really enjoy the fact that it's balancing both. The bit about doublethink and how it affected her thoughts was hugely interesting to me. I love that this is a first person narration, and thus we will get to see more. I'm really rooting for more trysts between the girls, and I'm looking forward to where the plot is going.

Too bad, another unfinished story. I skipped the whole enslaving-and-raping part in order to see if the story was worth reading and found out that it was. I was looking forward to seeing how she eventually managed to free herself.

Oh well, I guess I'll have to come up with it myself.

I don't normally leave reviews, in fact I never leave comments ever. But I had to speak my mind here.

Dude, what the fuck happened?

Part 1 was so good, I loved it! But it seems like part 2 and 3 were written by a different person.

First, you are aware this is an erotic fiction site, correct? You stories barely have anything erotic in them. There's lots of filler and technical stuff, which is great if you're into that but myself and I'm sure, plenty of others are here for the erotica and this story is seriously lacking in it.

Take chapter 2 for example, apart from the beginning we don't see Victor for a majority of the chapter, then at the very end they meet up. I got so excited to see what he was going to do with her and what did we get? "He spent the rest of the day and night parading me in front of his friends like a new toy, and once we returned to his room he used me like one."

Seriously? 3 pages of technical junk and solo masturbation but you skip over the actual good part of the story? I want to know how he used her, how she felt about it really, how he felt about it. What happened with her friends? Did they use her too? I don't and will never know because you skipped over it all!

Let's be honest, we don't care about the research. Throw in a line or two if you must, but get back to the actual erotica please.

And judging by the other comments here, I am not alone in saying that Victor does not have nearly enough scenes. The first chapter was amazing because not only did Amanda become a slave, but she became a slave for a man she hated and rejected. Their scenes were amazing, but everything after it had been frankly, boring. I couldn't care less about what happens in school and the other slaves and this random other girl, I want to see more of Victor/Amanda's relationship. For example, in chapter 2, Amanda looses her underwear, yet when she meets up with Victor he never makes a comment about this? Surely he would have something to say?

As soon as Amanda returned home to Victor I got excited as I thought something big was coming, but no. We got a spanking, a glossed over blow job and then back to boring plot. I've never been as disappointed in a story as I have this one.

If anyone out there would like to re-write or continue this story please link me, as I like the idea but hate the execution.

... yes, please!

Read some critical reviews ... maybe they have some points to make the story even better ... but I admit I was fascinated by this 3rd chapter as the story's scope evolves from a mere humil/degradation theme to adding a liberation theme. And this worked surprisingly well ...

So, will she succeed to get away from Victor? Will Hope take her instead or will she be able to free herself fully, possibly reuniting with Adam?

Just popped in to see if there was anything I missed. This story has its flaws, but it's one of the best slavery-mind control stories I've ever read. It would be great if the author decided to come back and write more chapters.