I Need a Man

Authors note- edit, edit, rewrite, rejected, edit, rewrite- this is my first attempt at story writing. Excuse my mistakes. All characters are over 18yrs. of age. There is a lot of sex and if you like my story, I can continue the main character's life story if you vote for more. Thanks

I need a man

This story is about my new life after I turned 19 years old. My name is Rob, but as my story will tell, I now call myself Robyn. It began when my Uncle and Aunt were planning a extended holiday in Europe and the Orient, and they needed a house sitter. I had just finishing my freshman year with no plans for the summer, so when they called and asked if I could look after their estate, I quickly accepted. I had planned on studying all summer anyways and this would give me the solitude I needed. I'm basically a loner and somewhat of a nerd, so I planned on enjoying my time alone, playing games, watching some movies and just being me.

I talked to my mom and she said it was ok, so I arrived shortly after school was out, excited that I would have their house all to myself. They picked me up at the bus depot and after a short drive we arrived at their isolated estate. We unloaded my luggage and left it at the front entrance so they could show me around their huge house, pointing out their acreage as we passed some large windows.There was everything I needed, including a car in the garage if I had to go into town for supplies. My Uncle explained he had a groundskeeper who came by once a week and he would ask him to check up on me and see if I needed anything. (I found out his name is Hugh)

They left later that day and since I had the whole place to myself, I began exploring and the first place I went to was the kitchen because I was really hungry. After finding where all the food was and making myself a sandwich, I cleaned up my dishes and continued checking the rest of the huge house. I went into every room to see what I could find and eventually ended upstairs in my Aunt and Uncle's humongous bedroom with a view of the country side. They had a king size bed with an ensuite that was bigger than my bedroom at home, so I decided I would sleep here and brought my bag upstairs.

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After a couple of days of enjoying my solitude living in the huge house, I felt it was time to study, ( not really, but sometimes it is boring being alone) so I went to the den and set up my laptop. My mind wasn't really into studing too hard, but I wanted to become a gynocologist because I found a woman's anatomy so beautiful. Her hourglass figure and full breasts were just like a piece of sculpture you would see in a museum. The vagina was the most interesting part for me since it is something I've had no experience with, except seeing my sisters naked a few times by accident (and that was only their pubic hair). Being a shy nerd, I've never had a girlfriend and my mind would imagine what it would be like to have a sexual experience with a female. I would daydream about having a girl showing me her pussy close up so I could examine what it looked like, my cock getting so hard as I pictured myself spreading her lips, seeing her hard nub poking out from under it's hood, her pussy wet and inviting. OMG!!! I was so horny as I quickly pulled down my pants and quickly jerked myself to orgasm. So much for studing!

Yes- I'm a virgin! To describe myself, I'm 5' 7" with a slim build and long toned legs, my honey brown hair hangs down past my shoulders which I keep tied back in a ponytail ( I try to blend in with some of the musician types that go to school). and a set of light blue eyes with long eyelashes. I'm basically hairless and have some feminine qualities such as a small adam's apple, a smooth complexion which I enjoy since shaving is only an occasional chore. My ass is nicely rounded and soft, (not something a guy likes to have), but no one is going to see me naked and I did like how it looked in the mirror. I figured I inherited my looks and body shape from my mother who is still a sexy woman. My penis also isn't the manly size I've seen on porn sites. ( Yes, I do watch porn! What young male doesn't?) It's about 4" when hard and pencil thin, ( it almost disappears inside my body when soft) so I only have to use my thumb and finger to play with it when I'm horny. My peanut size testis and scrotum also makes me feel ashamed of my small male genitalia, but, it does give me pleasure when I masturbate so I can't complain too much. ( I ejaculate alot of juices when I orgasm and I studied why- I have a large prostrate that produces alot of fluids for my sperm).

My father had died in a car accident when my mom was pregnant with me, so I was raised by her and my two older sisters. Without a male influence in the house, the girls enjoyed dressing me in their clothes when we were young and I had always felt good wearing their panties and dresses while playing games with them. They accepted me as their sister, but as I grew up and started school, my mother had me wearing my boy clothes and telling me that it wasn't good to show other kids my desires to dress up in sister's clothes.

My sisters had given me a lot of their old clothes and I had accumulated everything from dresses and panties with some small training bras that I would wear with socks inside to fill the cups. ( I loved pretending I had tits and was jealous as I saw my sister's enlarge with age). Since I had no close friends to invite back home after school, my routine was to come home and change completely into my girly clothes before I could relax and play some video games until supper time. My sisters and I would all be giggling about something around the table as mom served our food, enjoying our girly evenings together until bedtime. My older sister had given me a silky soft nighty that didn't fit her and I loved wearing it every night for bedtime. I still wear panties everyday instead of my boy underwear because they feel so much more comfortable and I really don't need much support for my little package.

I was teased alot as I got older, especially in high school when the jock boys saw my effeminate features and started calling me "girly boy" or "hotty", laughing and whistling at me as I quickly ran past them. Since I didn't have any close male friends, I felt more comfortable during those hard times when I was hanging out with some of the girls in my class. They accepted me because I wasn't a jock who would harass them sexually, even though I tried to act manly enough in their eyes. Deep inside me, I just wanted to be like them, dressing sexy and teasing the boys with flashes of my cute ass. They would gossip about everything, what fashions were in, makeup, shopping at the mall, how their boyfriends kissed them and all the things a girl does to be attractive in the world for a guy. They even teased me sometimes that I would look like a girl if I was dressed and wore makeup. I would blush and tell them "no way" and laugh along with them. Everything sounded like it took a lot of work to be a girl, but it only intrigued me about doing all these things myself someday when I'm dressed at home and alone.

I wasn't really naive about the birds and the bees at this point in my life, late night porn watching was part of my education about sex. I loved watching a man insert his penis into the girl's vagina, slowly fucking her and getting her aroused until he sped up, pounding his dick into her wet hole until finally he groaned and filled her with his cum. The girl would be laying there in rapture, her tits bouncing with each thrust of his cock and when she reached her orgasm, copius fliuds leaked from her pussy as her body shook with pleasure. (Mmmm, I'm so horny)

Sometimes when I was watching some of the good looking boys in our school, holding and kissing their girlfriends, my desires to be that girl would occupy my mind thru out the day. I was confused with these thoughts because I was a boy and I had a cock, not a pussy. No boy would want to hold me or kiss me because society frowned on such things. My sex education didn't teach anything about gay relationships, so why was I thinking a boy would want to be with me? I became awkward when I occasionaly had to talk to a good looking guy, my shyness causing my body to tremble as my cock became aroused in my panties. Sometimes I would check and find a wet spot after I calmed down, wondering why I was so turned on when a man paid attention to me. My imagination would run wild about what it would be like to touch him, letting him hold me and kissing me. OK!!! Stop it!! I said to myself. Why did I have this attraction to men?, I'm a boy. God! I'm so confused.

At night in bed, I would have vivid dreams of kissing and holding my own boyfriend, my body hugging the pillow as if it was his muscular body. But my dreams never had a conclusion, we would continue our petting, but never having "sex". I could never picture in my mind how we could ever manage "that" since we both had cocks and I couldn't change my body to having a pussy. I would wake up and find my panties and pillow wet with my cum, feeling quilty that I could be so horny dreaming about boys. I was going to have to figure out my life soon because I was lonely and getting depressed. I didn't want to be left out of the world around me and not have someone to love and hold me.

At home after school, I changed as soon as I got to my room, stripping off my boy clothes and putting on my old bra with a couple of water filled ballons. It felt so natural having the extra weight on my chest and I wished that they were real so I could truely feel like a girl. (Oh well, pretending would have to do). I finished my transformation with a long loose T shirt that just barley covered my ass. Untying my ponytail and shaking my hair loose, I looked like a teenage girl in the mirror, a cute girl that could easily attract a boy. My illusion faded as I felt my tucked cock tingle between my thighs, my girly thoughts disapperaing as I felt my "boy" parts stir to life. I wanted to stop having to pretend to be a girl and change my anatomy so I had a pussy like my sisters, a tight virginal, wet vagina that I could play with instead of jerking my little dick, wishing there was a way to make my dream come true. I sat on the bed, tears filling my eyes as I considered what my life would end up like in the future. My frustrations were leaving me quite depressed and I didn't have any one to talk to. My mother would gladly listen and make suggestions, but I knew she wouldn't think my transitioning at this time in my life would be benificial to me or the world.

I had worn a sexy silky thong for school that day and it just covers my tiny man parts, ( glad I didn't have gym) and feeling horny, I stretched out on my bed. Lifting my shirt, I began carressing myself like a girl, the silk of the thong adding to my pleasure as I rubbed my cock like I had a clitoris. It didn't take long for my orgasm to peak as my hips rose from the bed, my legs taunt and quivering as I soiled my panties with my cum. As I laid there, my mind felt excited and ashamed about what I was doing, ( but it felt sooooo goood! ) I was a "male", but inside I was confused about my sexuality and even though I had a cock and balls, my thoughts about being feminine felt more natural than being a male.

I settled into my new surroundings easily, my morning routine was to get up and shower using my Aunt's fragrant soaps and shaving my body until I was smooth all over. ( no one was going to see me hairless). Drying off, I applied some lotion to keep my skin soft (something I watched my sisters do) and wrapped my wet hair in a towel just like my sisters did. I had packed my suitcase with some of my fem clothes before my mom helped me zip it closed, (I'm sure she'd frown at me and not let me take them). I slipped on a pair of my sister's old panties and finished dressing in my regular boy clothes. I wasn't confident enough to fully dress while I was here since someone may come to the door.

Looking in the mirror, I unwrapped my wet hair and tried styling it using an hot iron to shape some curls and just trying different things until I thought I could do a good job making my hair more feminine. Oh well, I thought, as I brushed it out straight again and tied it back in my usual ponytail. At least I don't have to wear a wig if I'm getting dressed up girly. After straightening up the bathroom and bedroom, it was down to the kitchen were I would cook up some breakfast like I learned from my mother. I remembered our girly dress up times together, having fun while she dressed me in little fancy dresses and tights, letting my hair grow long and tying it with pretty bows. I really didn't know the difference that I was a boy and not a girl because I was a baby, but she was so great at accepting me as her little girl that I enjoyed everything we did together.

I went into the den after cleaning up the dishes and began to study some more. I was reading about the clitoris and the article stated, that when stimulated, ( fingers, tongues, etc.) a woman will have intense feelings throughout her nervous system, her nipples becoming erect and super sensitive as her vagina flowers and leaks her juices in anticipaction of being penetrated by a penis. The article also said that this manner of foreplay can result in the woman ejaculating a clear liquid in great quanities as she orgasms. I began to wonder how it would feel to have a woman's orgasm, her whole body racked with sexual pleasure as she cums.

When I play with my small penis, the pleasure I feel is quick and satisfying but vanishes too soon. I wished there was some way to prolong that excitement and orgasmic pleasure, but like all males who have ejaculated, a break is required to recover. I then decided to "experiment" on myself and maybe figure out how I could have a orgasm like a woman.

Since I had a body with the wrong sex parts,the only thing to do was to make myself as girly as possible. I had searched and watched some transexual porn on the internet and knew a man could look like a woman if all dressed up. They had altered their bodies with breast implants and until their true sex was uncovered, the man would not know the difference that he was seducing a tranny. After watching these videos, I knew now how my body could be used to satisfy a man. I just had to use my anus as my vagina, something that I hadn't really thought of since that part of me would be too dirty for having sex. Searching some more, I found out how an enema would leave your colon clean so it wouldn't be a disgusting mess when a man inserted his penis and fucked you.

These special girls seemed to enjoy being the woman in the relationship, sucking their man's hard cock til he was about to cum and then sitting on his lap, sinking down on his cock until it disappeared inside her boi hole. Her penis would bounce with each thrust of his big cock, her moans changing to squeals of delight as her man sped up, fucking her hard as she fisted herself to orgasm. OMG that was so hot and sexy.

Most tgirls I watched getting fucked had to play with their cocks until they ejaculated, but some lucky ones could cum without even touching themselves. I watched their faces as they climaxed and figured they where having both anal and penis orgasms, their bodies trembling and quivering as their clitty cream leaked while their partner fucked them hard and deep.

I also found some other sites that showed how these "girls" transformed themselves, doing their makeup, taking hormone treatments that caused their breasts to grow naturally and how to tuck their sex so nothing showed when they were dressed. ( Don't you just love Google!) My desire to do this was overwhelming my mind, my clitty always hard as I watched these beautiful Tgirls getting fucked by big strong muscular men with huge cocks, enjoying their passive girly personas. So I made my decision to begin my transformation and become just like these girls I watched on the porn sites. No longer did I have a cock, it was now my clitoris, my anus would be my vagina and I knew just what to do about making my breasts larger.

Driving into town, I went to the drugstore and bought some estrogen pills, along with a bottle of saline solution and a large syringe and as a last thought- some hair removal stuff. I returned home and started taking the estrogen, not knowing how long I would see any changes take affect with my body. Within a few days, my body started to respond to the pills because I began to feel some ache in my chest and my nipples were very sensitive. I pulled them and tried to stretch my skin, wanting them to grow and fill out so I had real breasts to play with.

Now if I played with my clitty it took longer to get hard and the only thing I could do was stroke it between my thumb and finger, rubbing my knob until I finally dribbled my juices. My body now responded differently when I came, my nerves were electricfied causing goosebumps to cover my naked skin and my legs felt rubbery as I tried to extend the euphoria of my orgasm.

I reached behind and touched my pussy, teasing my hole until it was loose enough to let my finger slide inside me. I explored my inner self, feeling the heat and flesh of my pussy, enjoying this sensation of being penetrated and it was just what I needed to let a final moan escape my lips as more juices exploded from my clitty. I stood there shivering and out of breath, enjoying the last of my orgasm as my clitty shrunk back to it's minature size. All thru the day, my mind was only thinking about that wonderful sexy feeling I felt when my finger entered my pussy for the first time. Maybe it was the excitement of being naughty or the feel of the muscle squeezing tight around my probing which quickened my orgasm. OMG! I just knew I wanted it to try it again. But, could I let a man put his large penis inside me? I would have to practise with something bigger than my finger and hopefully I would learn to loosen up and let a man fuck me for my experiment.

In my exploration of the house, I had opened my Aunt's dresser drawers and WOW- I was in heaven. She had many sexy things, panties, bras, nighties, and nylons, all the lingerie I had dreamed of owning. I felt a little quilty about what I was doing, but her lingerie was so inticing that I had to try some on. She's almost my size, 5' 6", and 115 lbs, so everything I found was a little tight, but some fit perfect, so I selected an assortment I would wear while I was here. These were so much better than my sisters old underwear and some were so sexy that my clitty started to harden just looking at them.

I stripped and picked a pair of silky boyshorts,sliding them up my smooth legs and snugging them tight over my hidden clitty. I ran my hands over my ass, feeling my silk covered cheeks as I straightened the seams of the panties. Perfect was the only word I could think of until I covered them under my regular guy clothes. Oh well, I have all summer to play and hopefully I could get fully dressed when I was sure no one will come to the house unannounced. The groundskeeper would be here on the weekend so I had a few days to try on my Aunt's clothes to see what fit. Her bras fit my chest just right but my imaginary growing boobs didn't fill out the cups, so I decided now was the time to make them bigger.

I had read a medical journal about injecting saline solution into the breast area to enlarge them temporally and the saline would eventually be absorbed into the body. Removing my shirt and standing in front of the bathroom mirror, I filled the large syringe and followed the procedure from the medical book. With a sharp prick to the side of my breast, I began to slowly inject the liquid, seeing and feeling the skin of my chest slowly enlarging as I felt the pressure of the liquid stretching and filling my breast area like a water ballon.