Jackie Jaye 01

"LOL, continue passing out the Shish Kabobs and meet me in in the kitchen. The hamburger and hot tray is heavy and we'll find you a new ink pen just in case Shelia happens to mention what would be an appropriate response on my part when Spider locks Zula away in her sleeping capsule for the night. You might mention to Shelia that the movie trailer on TV made me gasp. I'll be in the kitchen."

And then I hoped that Chad remembered to have a few Shish Kabobs himself and if he didn't, well, there are more in the refrigerator so if I have to make them special, then so be it.

"Alright, I think I got it all now. Shelia told me to stop writing things down and to figure a few things out for myself. By the way, your pen is in the neighbor's yard. Holy feed the neighborhood, are those all for this party or is the neighborhood stopping by?"

"Sorry Chad, but the truth is your heart felt words have me a little shook up. Here, put this other pen in your pocket just in case Shelia has something to say about what side of the river we eat on. You should mention that she might do well if she wears my Ursula battle corset just before she does her dirty laundry on top of the washing machine. And be sure to write her responses down carefully Chad, I mean it's our first date and your words are important to me. Meet me back at the grill in 18 minutes."

Well, that was a mistake because this tray is super heavy and I forgot all about the buns and the condiments and the napkins and on and on, and OMG it's no wonder I've never thrown a party. I mean, the host as to work her ass off. And then another thing happened and LOL, Chris was so hoping that it would lead to another thing.

"Hey baby, what can I do? You know I'm here to help, right?"

"Well, first, stop squeezing my ass and secondly, grab some of this stuff while I get the Raspberry Vodka out of the freezer. And of course, when I said to grab some stuff, I meant the hamburger buns and stuff and when I say buns, I don't mean mine."

"Ah come on baby, you know I can't resist you. Hey, let me take you to a rodeo."

"Oh, I know what wild bronco you want to buck on. Just take this stuff outside and ask me again, never."

I left Chris behind and headed out to grill to start the hamburgers. And do you know what I got? Wow, compliments on the Shish Kabobs and regular conversation for a few minutes from each guest. That, ladies and gentlemen, is what I call priceless! Jackie Jaye, acceptable supreme party host!

"Chad, help me set the serving table. Line everything up like you will need it as you make a hamburger and what did Shelia say about absolutely anything?"

"Ooh, I got this. Shoot, there's mustard on it, but here goes. Ah, thank you, there is a power belt missing from the sexy uniform, the north side of the river and shoot, there's ketchup on my paper, but I think it says our first date will be fine and our second date can be at the rodeo. Damn relish, I think we're suppose to buck a bronco or something. And then Shelia downed another Vodka shot, so I don't want to talk to her any more for a while, OK? By the way, the ink pen is jabbed into my arm. Will you pull it out before I die?"

"Of course. There. Go rub some dirt on that gaping wound and let people know it's 7 minutes to hamburgers."

"Hey, are you going to freak out if I return the kiss tonight? You know, before the blood poisoning sets in?"

"LOL, on the cheek, while I'm slaving at the grill and when someone has a camera pointed our way." Oh, shoot, that is bad. Get a little more dirt in there. Belly up people, the burgers are hot."

"And so is the cook."

LOL, who said that? LOL, like I care and I don't care if they say it again. I mean, it's party time.

End Jackie Jaye 01