Heard it on the Radio Ch. 02

"So poor Jim got cut off. I told him I was getting migraines. And he... he was so kind and solicitous to me that it made me feel really bad about what I was doing. In fact, I got so stressed out I really did start to get some genuine migraines."

Claire: "That's just so messed up!"

KayCee: "It's even more messed up than that, Claire. This morning I woke Jim up by sucking on his cock, then I fucked him really, really hard for about an hour. Three times in all! I guess he must have thought all his birthdays had come at once! He got me off at least three times, too."

Claire: "I don't understand? Why did you do that if you are dropping the hammer on him this afternoon?"

KayCee: "I wish you wouldn't use that term! It makes it sound as if I'm deliberately setting out to hurt Jim. Nothing could be further from the truth, though I know full well he will be hurting. And at my hand, too! We haven't had sex in three months.

"I guessed that when we break up, he isn't going to get any sex for months at best or, at worst, for several years, as I know my Jim, he isn't one for one night stands. So I fucked him today so he'd have a nice, sexy memory of out last time together."

Claire: "Jeez! That's a mixture of the romantic and the sick, all at the same time."

***

Don walked back into the main studio and realised immediately that something was wrong. Normally the lights of the telephone system would be flashing. There wasn't one light. Strange. He touched the board and immediately noticed that it was dead.

He realised that the monitoring system that should be relaying the on-air content throughout the building wasn't working. He grabbed a small and battered portable radio from its place on the shelf behind the mixer desk. This was his emergency on-air monitor. It had come with him from BBC Radio Scotland where had had began his career many years before.

What he heard coming from the tiny speaker made him gasp with incredulity. "Aw, shite, girls," he muttered under his breath. He immediately had a pretty good idea what had happened. The brand new, million Dollar wonder machine had gone down.

He hit the reset button, but it didn't work! He immediately pulled his cellphone out and hit the speed dial for the transmitter site that was a couple of miles away.

"Miles! We have a major SNAFU, here! You need to kill the feed from the studio and go over the the emergency broadcast program unit. Put it on as soon as you can, if not sooner!"

He knew that Miles, the duty transmitter engineer, would take a few minutes to switch over to the old-fashioned 8 Track cartridge system that held an hour of emergency broadcast materials. Basically it was just a collection of by now badly outdated tunes interspersed with announcements every-so-often.

Meanwhile Don hurried through the near-deserted station to KayCee's studio. When he arrived he jerked to door open and pointed to the two women, then with his right hand he made the classic: "kill the broadcast" gesture of a hand slice to the throat.

Claire immediately reached over and turned off the microphone.

Claire looked at him. "How... how much of what we said was broadcast?"

Don shook his head. "I have no way of knowing until I review the log tapes that we record for the FCC. But you both could be in a lot of trouble with management. I'm going to put a call in to Keith Sullivan, our general manager to put him in the picture."

KayCee looked sickly. "Oh, God! I just thought! Jim always listens to my show and tapes it. I hope he didn't hear what we were just talking about!"

Don glanced at her. He felt angry at her. He hadn't heard all of the accidental broadcast. Just enough to get a flavour of it.

KayCee took her cellphone from her bag and dialled Jim's number.

Jim had listened to the impromptu broadcast with a mixture of incredulity and rage. He could not recall ever having felt so angry in his life!

It was curious. He could actually feel the white heat of his anger burning away, layer by layer, the love that he had felt for KayCee.

"Fucking bitch!" he had shouted. "How the fuck could you cheat on me?"

He wondered if it could have been a sick prank? What would he find in the top drawer of her desk? A note saying: 'Got you?'

He wrenched the drawer open and there they where. The divorce papers.

Then his phone rang. He looked at the phone, saw it was KayCee. He was about to ignore it when a brilliant plan came, fully formed, into his mind.

He answered it and deliberately made himself sound sleepy. "Hi, honey? You OK? Your broadcast went well?"

"Didn't you hear it?" she asked, a tinge of anxiety in her voice.

"Oh, sorry baby, I didn't. After you went to work I must have fallen asleep again. You wore me out!" He gave a convincing yawn. "Fact is, your call woke me up. I'll get a shower then get on with some work. You'll be here at 4.30, yeah?"

"Sorry to wake you, Jim, honey. Yes, I'll see you at 4.30 this afternoon."

They said their goodbyes and Jim's plan began to come into action.

She would arrive at 4.30pm. It was now just before 11.30am, so he had five hours in which to get it all together.

First, he went out into the back yard. He filled all of the water tanks of his motorhome and plugged the Swedish-made charger in to make sure all the batteries were full charged. He put it on the boost setting.

Then he began taking all the belongings he wanted to take with him down to the motorhome. He took his clothing out one drawer at a time and soon had the clothing stashed in the drawers under the King sized bed.

Next his electronic gear including his main computer, his laptop, his iPad, his Kindle, the various tools of his writer's career, some mementos of his late parents, his framed degree and several other odds and ends, including his collection of spirits from round the world. He stashed those safely as he would have a long drive ahead of him.

It was funny but he hadn't seemed to have amassed much as a married man. Maybe that told him something?

He sat in the motorhome and used his iPad to access the US Postal Service and set up a mail redirect service C/O his old employer, Dave. He'd clear it with Dave, later. He also took his name off the one joint account he and KayCee had.

One last look around the apartment, then he closed the door behind him. He had left his keys on the table in the kitchen, along with his wedding ring.

His first stop was to fuel up his motorhome with enough fuel for the journey.

Next stop? He caused something of a stir by parking his behemoth of a vehicle outside the lawyer that KayCee was using.

In reception he told the woman behind the counter who he was and that he had come to see the lawyer working for KayCee Williams and that he had the divorce paperwork ready for them.

After a few minutes a tall, thin man with a thick head of dark hair came to see him. They shook hands. "Please follow me, Mr Scott. We don't normally meet the spouse of our client like this, so this is a new experience for me!"

In a ground floor conference room Jim pointed to some points in the settlement that he did not agree to. The lawyer frowned, asked him if he was sure. Jim was implacable and after a brief discussion, the lawyer agreed to have a new version of the divorce papers printed.

Jim read through them, nodded his agreement to the terms and signed them.

He shook hands with the lawyer and was soon driving his motorhome heading out of the greater metro area, on the freeway, heading home. But in reality, he had no home...

By 4pm he had driven nearly 200 miles, so he was almost halfway to his destination. He left the freeway, following a sign to a parking and picnic area. Fortunately there was enough space for his motorhome.

He parked and he waited for 4.30 to arrive.

***

At just before 4.30pm, KayCee and Claire arrived at the apartment.

"He'll be here," said KayCee. "You can rely on that. Jim's so reliable."

Claire gave her a strange look, and shook her head.

When KayCee realised that Jim wasn't there, that he had already left her she wailed out: "So he must have heard the broadcast! He... lied to me?"

Claire shot her a withering look. "Fucks sake, KayCee! He lied to you? Get over it, huh? He lied once, you fucked around on him for three months. Grow up!"

"But what shall I do?" she replied.

"Call him. Now!" With your fucking phone!"

"But what if he doesn't answer?"

"If you don't call him, you'll never know!"

To her shock and, if she were honest with herself, fear, he answered on the first ring.

"Yes? What?"

So abrupt, so cold. But then, what the fuck could she have expected?

"It's me, honey. Your... wife... KayCee."

"Oh, yes. I used to have one of those. A wife. Haven't any longer. Talk to me."

"I didn't want it to end like this, Jim. I truly didn't."

"That's the difference between us, KayCee. You didn't want it to end like this and I didn't want it to end at all! So, neither of us really got what we wanted. Life's a fucking bitch like that. So, tell me. What do you want from me?"

"I just want you to be able to get past this, and to have a good, happy life, Jim."

"Really? You want me to meet someone else, get married, have children and live happily ever after?"

"Yes, Jim. I want for both of us to be happy, going forward. Me with Chuck and you with your new lady, whoever she might turn out to be. I really do want that for you. Maybe when it's all settled down, you and your new love and Chuck and I could get together for dinner, and stuff like that?"

"Fuck that shit, you crazy bitch!"

"Jim! Don't talk to me that way!"

"Look, you phoned me. Id just as rather not be talking with you as talking to you. So stop with the shit, OK?

"You want me to be happy? To meet someone else? I haven't dated in years, so with my heart breaking from what you did, I'll have to go out to singles bars and night clubs filled with nutty women who are desperate for a sap to be a father to their fucking brats?

"Or maybe join a dating site and end up with some psycho bitch putting an icepick through my fucking eye because I remind her of an ex?

"I'm not interested, KayCee! Is that the future you have mapped out for me? Trawling through the broken, the bewildered and the mad, just to get my rocks off in the hope of finding someone who could replace you?

"To be honest, KayCee, I'd rather live alone for the next 40 years than live like that in the short term!"

The next person who spoke was Claire. "Jim, this is Claire. Look... things don't have to be like that. Hopefully, you might meet someone nice, someone who you want to spend the rest of your life with."

"Well, Claire, what if I did that? It won't make a blind bit of difference. My thinking is all over the fucking place. What if I did meet that special someone? Someone I'd want to spend the rest of my life with? I did that before, twice, and guess what, Claire? Both times they cheated on me and broke my fucking heart!"

He paused before continuing. "Claire, what if it wasn't Rosie or KayCee's fault? What if I am useless in bed? What if I am so rotten a person that people have such little respect for me that they just can't help cheating on me? What if their cheating is my fault?"

Jim heard KayCee quietly sobbing, as he heard Claire gasp before she spoke to him, again. "Oh, you poor, poor soul! You mustn't think that way! That's not right, it's not your fault! Please believe me! I'm your friend.?"

"But are you my friend, Claire? You knew about KayCee's affair, but you never told me a thing about it. Not even a hint, not even a warning. Nothing."

There was a catch in Claire's voice when she replied: "You're right, Jim. I was a crappy friend to you. I'm sorry about that."

"Oh, yeah, KayCee, I expect the main reason for your call was to ask me about the divorce papers. You'll have noticed that they aren't in the drawer.

"That's because I signed them and took them to your lawyer's office. However, there were two points in the papers that I didn't like. For example, I don't intend to spend my nights in the second bedroom crying into my pillow whilst I listen to you fucking Chuck in what used to be the bed I shared with you.

"Also, the $100,000 alimony, I don't think..." KayCee interrupted him. "That's OK, Jim, honey. I will increase it to whatever you think is reasonable."

"That's not what I mean. What I mean is that I asked your lawyer to take the amount of alimony to zero. I don't want any of your money, KayCee. Not one red cent!"

That news shocked KayCee. "But... Jim... that means I can't do anything to put the situation right! I can't fix it!"

"It's beyond fixing, KayCee," replied Jim. "You wanted to give me alimony to assuage your guilt. That's not acceptable to me. You thought you could buy me off. What? We've been together all of these years and you misread me so fucking much? That hurts, KayCee. It really does!"

I'm so sorry, Jim. I am sorry that it got like this."

"KayCee, I only hope your relationship with Chuck lasts. Because if it doesn't, that means you'll have broken my heart for nothing!

"KayCee, you made a very important, special promise to me. And you broke it. You broke your word to me."

"Oh, Jim, honey. I know. Those wedding vows were an important promise and I..."

"Fuck!" Shouted Jim. "You don't even remember the special promise you made. Good call about you breaking your wedding vows. But that wasn't what I was thinking about. Do you remember the special promise you made to me? The one you swore on your grandmother's grave?"

KayCee let out an animalastic sound of torment. "Oh, God! Oh my God! Oh, Jim! I am so.... there's nothing I can say or do to to fix that, is there? I promised you I'd never cheat on you like Rosie did, I even swore it on my grandma's grave and in the end, I cheated on you worse than Rosie ever did! You must think I'm a real piece of shit!"

Jim, ignored her remark, as another thought came to him and added to the fiery rage that was burning through his mind. "You cut me off from sex, because you thought having sex with me was cheating on your lover? That's just fucking sick! And then you give me the going away present of a shitty pity fuck? And we fucked bareback, so when I do get back home I gotta get myself checked out for HIV and ST-fucking Ds! Thanks a bunch, you stupid fuck! That's it, bitch! This fucking conversation is over!"

Jim disconnected his phone. The talking was done.

Trembling, he downed a glass of water, stashed the glass away and after waiting until his rage had abated, re-started his journey home.

He put a call through to Dave. He'd emailed Dave the evening before, the evening before it had all gone to shit. He'd sent four finished articles over.

He knew Dave had kept him busy with a steady stream of work and that he had promised that a job as a copywriter would always be open for him, well, now was the time to see if hew could come through for him.

"Hi, Jim!" Dave sounded pleased to hear him. Always a good sign, Jim thought, when someone wants to speak with you. "How are things with you and the lovely KayCee?"

"Hi, Dave. Hope you and Kathy are doing OK. Look, the thing is, things between me and KayCee have gone to hell. She was cheating on me with someone from her work and she accidentally made a live broadcast boasting about how she was going to dump me. Bitch even had the divorce papers ready!"

"Jesus, Jim! That's just so fucked up! Look, dude, do you want a place to stay for a couple of days?"

"Dave, please, that's be great. I need to ask a favour of you. Do you still have the secure yard at the back of your building empty? Can I have my mail redirected to your address? And is that promise of a job still good?"

"For you my man, yes to all three questions. But why'd you need the yard?"

Despite himself, Jim laughed. "I have a huge motorhome and I'm currently driving home in it and I'd like a safe place to park it in so I can live in it."

"Sure, that sounds neat, Jim! When will you get here?"

"I figure to get there at about 9.30pm this evening."

"Great! Kathy and me will come visit with you and bring some beers!"

He arrived a little before 10pm after getting delayed in a traffic snarl-up. Kathy and Dave joined Jim in the eye-popping opulence of the motorhome's lounge, drank the beer and talked long into the night.

"Jim," said Kathy, "To say I am really disappointed in KayCee is a real understatement. We'll be here for you, OK?"

After they left, Jim tried to sleep. Eventually he gave up and took a good slug of Maker's Mark. Which helped, somewhat.

***

Earlier that evening KayCee had received an ominous text message telling her that she -and Claire- had both been suspended from broadcasting, but that, pending the results of an investigation, they would be receiving their normal salaries.

However, the general manager, Keith Sullivan, wanted to see everyone concerned at the station the next day at noon.

The situation had become somewhat more difficult as the impromptu broadcast had been recorded and had gone viral on the Internet on Youtube, Facebook and a variety of other social media sites. The FCC had asked for a copy of the log tapes to be sent to them for their investigation.

There was an accidental gathering of the main protagonists in the lobby, Keith Sullivan, KayCee and Claire and Don McClure and Chuck who was stood glowering on the bottom steps of the staircase from the lobby. With his beard and his biker clothing and his cultivated mean expression he thought he looked menacing and manly, but in reality he just looked as if someone had broken a particularly sulphurous fart under his nose.

Keith said: "Jesus! What a mess! Stupid enough to fuck each other, and dumb enough to broadcast the evidence! The FCC will be after us, more than likely. They'll want to establish if this is a fix to get better Nielson ratings or a real, genuine broadcasting fiasco! We need to continue this discussion in my office..."

Before he could say any more, a whirling force of nature crashed its way through the door from the street.

She was short, well-built, almost Hobbit-like in stature but she was remarkably pretty about the face.

She look round the room and spied her target who cringed from her. "Cadfael!" she shouted at Chuck. "You cheating, no good piece of trash! I heard your name on the broadcast when it was put up on Youtube and I thought: "If that bastard Cadfael is cheating on me and the girls again, I'll divorce him!"

"Now, look, Sally, I... it's not what you think... I..."

KayCee shouted: "You... You absolute fucking bastard, Chuck! You proposed to me and told me to divorce Jim, so we could get married. And you have a wife and children? How could you do this to me? Oh, Jesus! Poor Jim! I divorced the sweetest, kindness man I ever knew and it was all for nothing!"

Sally looked at her husband as he walked down the stairs into the lobby. His eyes flashed and he made as if to strike her. Suddenly she gave him two blows to the chin, first left fist, then right, forcing him to collapse to the floor of the lobby.

He groaned. "You saw that! She hit me. I'm gonna call the cops on her!"

Keith looked at him with disgust and said, sneeringly, "What I saw... 'Cadfael'... was some piece of shit trying to punch his wife who had to react in self-defence. That's what I saw. And I think we see the lie behind your bad boy persona, now, don't we? Anyway, what's with the weird name... Chuckie, baby?"

Chuck/Cadfael glowered as he stumbled to his feet. Sally said: "His mother was a fan of some English writer who wrote about a monk in the olden days. It was like an historical version of CSI, with a religious link thrown in. Cadfael was a Welsh monk living in England. Apparently he prefers the name Chuck. Though I think adulterous asshole fits him so much better, don't you?