by iWriter4U
Kinda silly and hard to follow due to all the quotes (within a quote). Not sure how this story is rated so high.
Revealing their love, feelings and desires for each other through their notes and phone conversations is so beautiful and exciting. It is much more beautiful than their physical union and consummation.
The technique was a bit clumsy, and the prose far too wordy.
That said, somehow you managed to put what felt like real emotion into your story, so it worked despite its flaws. I really enjoyed it. The characters were likeable and the pacing was good - not rushed, but not boring either.
I'm going to check out your other pieces.
Please use quotation properly. If you don't know how to use then don't use.
Content can sometimes glaze over the bad grammar, punctuation and spelling. My only issue is the contractions and their tic (‘). It interrupts the glow. Good sriry with avaurprise ending. 4*
Nice story but there were too many quotes and not enough about the sex!! There should have been more about their sex life after they left the hotel, you skipped to far ahead. Him loosing his mother brought him so much pain you should have written more about this!!!! Gave it 3 stars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A very strange story in the way it is written, but still a very worthwhile read. Not a tug and cum type of story, but instead it's a story of love between a young man and his mother. The ending was nice as well because there wasn't the need for guilt and deception any longer.
Anonymous - if by improper use of quotation you're talking about the omission of the closing quotation mark until the last paragraph, that is actually a legitimate technique, and for some people the only correct one for quotations of more than one paragraph.
Great story. It was a nice chamge of pacevfrom the usual mother son trope in literotica.
First, I am so sorry for your loss.
I liked this and the way it flowed. The punctuation was fine. If grammar is the only complaint, then everything is okay. No two people are going to agree on how to quote a quote. I enjoy you and your late husband's work.