My [Task] Master

"Well that is a relief. I would hate to be the cause of a woman losing something as important as her breasts," Greg said with a grin.

Laura felt her cheeks get even hotter at his second mention of her boobs . She stood silently for a moment when Morgan came to the rescue.

"Greg, you remember I mentioned my personal assistant and best friend. Please meet Laura! Although, I take it you two have already had a run in... literally."

"Yes, we did, I'm afraid. Laura, it is a pleasure to meet you. I've heard good things about you from Morgan and from Alex Horne. I am truly so sorry for dumping my tea on you before the show." He offered her one extremely large hand.

"You have nothing to apologise for," Laura finally got herself to smile up at Greg and shook his hand. "I wasn't looking where I was going and I believe it was I that ran into you."

"Oh, nonsense! I'm sure I ruined that lovely blouse you were wearing. May I pay you back for it?"

"Oh no! Besides I think we're even. I'm afraid I stained your shirt," Laura reached behind her and picked up the white t-shirt that Greg had shoved against her chest earlier. It had definite tea stains as well as a couple patches of beige foundation and streaks of mascara. "The makeup should wash out if you set it properly, but I'm afraid the tea is permanent."

"I don't think a soiled undershirt is the same as your ruined blouse-" Greg started.

"Ah, Laura! You're looking nice and dry," Alex Horne said joining the small circle.

"Thank you, Alex. It's nice to see you again," Laura smiled at him.

"Greg, Laura is a TaskMaster superfan and a brilliant comedy writer. I think she would be a fantastic addition to our American team," Alex continued.

"Oh I don't know about that," Laura laughed.

"It's not just TaskMaster," added Morgan. "She's seen everything you've done Greg. Everything."

Laura put a hand on Morgan's arm to shut her up.

"I am a very big fan," Laura conceded. "I have really been looking forward to meeting you."

"Laura and I were going to go out for a bite. Would you like to join us?" Morgan asked excitedly. Laura's eyes went wide looking at her friend in shock.

"Not tonight I'm afraid. I have a red-eye flight to London in an hour or so. But maybe next week?"

"We'll hold you to that!" Morgan said.

Greg smiled down at them and said a good evening before heading to his dressing room.

Laura turned to Morgan with a look of disbelief.

"You're welcome!" She trilled.

The next morning, Morgan had a pilot read at the Paramount lot and Laura stayed at the hotel to confirm comedy club bookings. Just after noon, there was a knock at her door. She answered the door to a young man in a canvas jacket and ball cap.

"Laura Whittmann?"

"Yes, that's me."

"Courier delivery. Will you sign for this?"

The man held a rectangle package done up in yellow paper with a black satin ribbon. He offered her an iphone and she signed her name with her finger then he handed over the box.

"Do you know who it's from?" Laura asked.

"Nope, I just deliver them," he said with a small wave and he was off down the hall.

Laura brought the box into her room and sat on the king size bed. She ran her hand over the yellow wrapping and knew it was high quality. She pulled one end of the black satin ribbon and the bow came apart. She slid a finger into the wrapping paper and gingerly pulled it off the box. The top of the box was embossed with black letters that said 'Balenciaga' and in fine curled silver print 'Rodeo Drive.'

"What the hell?" She thought as she shimmied the top off the box. Inside was a layer of fine striped tissue paper, but sitting on the tissue paper was an ivory tri fold paper sealed with red wax. It looked just like a task envelope except that the seal had the initials 'GD' instead of the TaskMaster 'TM'. Laura picked up the paper and gently opened the seal. A short note was typed in typewriter print:

Dear Laura,

Please accept this as a replacement for the blouse I ruined. It was lovely to meet you and I look forward to seeing you at the next studio show.

-The TaskMaster, Greg Davies

Laura bit her lip to try and settle the butterflies that had just taken off in her stomach. She set down the letter and pulled back the top of the tissue paper. In the box was a beige blouse. Laura held it up and examined it. The color was somewhat similar to the shirt she'd worn the night before, and this had some similar design features, but the blouse that Laura now held in her hands was a stunning 100% silk Balenciaga piece that probably cost more than Laura's monthly rent. The top she'd worn last night had been a polyester thing that she'd gotten on some cheap fashion website.

She brought the silk up to her face and brushed it against her cheek feeling the incredible smoothness of the fabric. She immediately peeled off the sweatshirt she was wearing and carefully pulled on the blouse and buttoned the delicate little pearl buttons. She looked in the mirror and was blown away that it fit so well.

Laura's mind started racing through emotions realizing that this was a gift from her ultimathe celebrity crush. 'But it was most likely purchased by some assistant' she reminded herself so as not to read too much into the gift. A purchase like this would bankrupt Laura, but it was probably just pocket change for Greg Davies.

She took the shirt off and hung it gingerly on a padded hanger and attempted to get back to work, but she found herself looking back at the shirt every other minute. Finally she heard Morgan return next door and she rushed over with the note and the shirt.

"Holy shit, this is like NICE," Morgan said fingering the silk.

"What do I do with it?" Laura asked. "Should I send it back?"

"What? No!" Morgan shrieked. "You have to wear it!"

Laura smiled meekly, "It does look amazing on me. I already tried it on."

"Damn straight!"

Chapter 2

At the next studio show taping, Laura wore her new silk top and a pair of tight jeans. She opted for a pair of heeled booties for the extra height but also comfort. She sat in the greenroom chatting with Kumail Nanjiani's agent when Alex ran in, "Laura, we have a task emergency. Can you come help me?"

"Yeah of course!" Laura followed him up to the stage where Alex had been doing a run through of that night's live task with crew stand-ins when it was realized that the marshmallows that were supposed to be used in the task were not sticking to the wall as planned.

"There's a bit of a marshmallow theme for the tasks tonight, but this isn't working."

Laura thought for just a moment, "What about a game of Chubby Bunny?"

"Excuse me?"

"Everyone stuffs as many marshmallows into their mouths as they can and they try to say 'Chubby Bunny', but you could have them say something TaskMaster related instead. The person who crams the most marshmallows in their mouth wins. Seriously, people who grew up going to summer camp will totally know this game."

"It seems a little basic," one of the producers said.

Laura turned to the man and tried not to sound too sarcastic, "In Series 1 Alex had a live task where the contestants literally had to stand after 100 seconds. At least this has props!"

Alex nodded, "That's true."

"Let's test it with the stand-ins," said the director.

The five stand-ins took turns shoving marshmallows in their mouths and saying different phrases. It was hilarious and everyone agreed it was perfect for that evening's live task.

"Excellent work, Laura," Alex said as the crew reset the stage in preparation for the taping. "I meant it last week when I said you'd be a great addition to our team."

Laura chuckled, "I'm so flattered, Alex. I just don't know if I could leave Morgan."

"We can discuss it more at a later date. I need to go get changed." Alex excused himself and went down to his dressing room.

Laura stood alone on the stage of the theatre. The projection screen hadn't been flown in from the fly system yet and she peered down at the red carpeted foreground.

"That was an impressive idea."

Laura spun around at the voice from the wings. Greg Davies stood in the corner of the stage already dressed in his all black ensemble.

"Thank you. But it was just an old camp game! It's all I can think of when I see marshmallows," she felt a slight blush in her cheeks already.

Greg stepped onto the stage and into the light. Standing near him again, Laura was reminded of just how tall he was, making her feel small and delicate.

"That is a lovely blouse," Greg said, giving Laura's torso a once over. She was suddenly very aware of the low cut of the silk.

"Yes, it's a very nice piece," Laura responded, surprising herself with her boldness. "But when I wear it I'm very wary of men carrying cups of hot tea."

Greg laughed. He opened his mouth to speak again when a call came from a stage manager, "Please clear the stage! House is opening!"

"We'd better get downstairs," Greg said. They walked silently together down the back stairs to the green room where Morgan saw them walk in together.

"Greg! Great to see you again! How was your trip back to England?"

"It was lovely, thank you! But I'm glad to not be on a red eye flight tonight. This time I don't fly out until tomorrow."

"Awesome! You're still grabbing dinner with us tonight, right?"

"I'm sure he has plans-" started Laura.

"Yes, of course!" Greg replied quickly. "You said you'd hold me to it and I made sure to keep my calendar open."

"Really?" Laura said meekly. Her cheeks reddened as she realized she'd said that out loud and Greg laughed.

"If the invitation still stands?" He looked down expectantly at Laura.

"Yes! It does!" Morgan cut in when Laura stood there silently.

"Excellent! Well, I'd best look over the teleprompter screens before I go onstage. Until after," he gave Laura another smile and she felt her stomach do a complete flip.

Without any tea spilling incidents, Laura was able to get to her seat in the auditorium for the show taping. It was surreal to be watching her favorite show in the studio audience and it was great to see her friend win two of the tasks.

The live task at the end of the show went over very well. The audience loved it and Greg cackled from his throne as all the comedians called out "I love the TaskMaster" with mouths full of white fluff.

After the filming ended, Laura snuck out of the crowd and showed her ID badge to get backstage again. In the greenroom she congratulated Eugene Mirman on his episode win. Alex came through and thanked Laura again for her input on the final task.

"We will make sure you have a writing credit on this episode when it airs," he said.

"Oh you don't have to bother with that," Laura waved a hand at the idea.

"Absolutely not. I can't take credit for your fantastic idea. Besides, a primetime writing credit will look great on your CV."

Laura smiled and thanked him. The greenroom emptied out quickly that evening and Laura found herself almost alone with just the production crew cleaning around her. Finally Greg appeared in the doorway and Laura's heart sped up double seeing him in a more casual look of jeans and a plaid button down shirt over a black t-shirt.

"Sorry to keep you waiting. I popped out back for a smoke," he explained.

"No problem," Laura smiled. "Morgan hasn't appeared yet, either." She stood and pulled on her coat to be ready as soon as Morgan came out of her dressing room.

"Where are we going for dinner?" Greg asked.

"I honestly don't know," Laura admitted. "Morgan said she'd take care of it."

At that moment, Morgan came flying out of her dressing room, phone in hand.

"Yeah, yeah of course! No Alan I know, I'll be right there. Yes, let me off the phone and I'll call an Uber! Bye!" She ended the call with a huge smile. "That was Alan! He got me on the main stage at the Laugh Factory!"

"Whoa! Morgan that's huge!" Laura hugged her.

"Congratulations, Morgan," agreed Greg.

"Yeah, but the spot is at 10 pm. With travel and prep I'm barely gonna make it, so I've gotta go now!"

"Oh," Laura felt the instant conflicting emotions between being so excited for her friend and losing the chance to spend the evening with Greg Davies. "Well yeah, we'd better get going."

"No, no! You go with Greg! You've seen my set a million times and Alan is gonna meet me there so I'll be fine! Seriously, you two go have fun!"

She rushed back into her dressing room and grabbed her bag then ran toward the stage door.

Laura turned to Greg, "Listen Mr. Davies, you really don't need to hang out with me tonight. I'm sure you have more exciting friends here-"

"First off-" he stopped her. "Do not call me Mr. Davies. I left teaching behind long ago and second, I will spend the evening with you as promised."

Laura couldn't help herself from smiling from ear to ear.

"Okay," she chuckled. "Well I actually don't know what Morgan had planned for tonight so I guess we'll have to improvise. Where would you like to go?"

"I am game for anything. I'm sure you know the terrain better than I do."

"I did spend a semester in LA in college so I know the layout," Laura said. "Have you had In'N Out?"

Greg shook his head, "No."

"I think you'll love it," Laura pulled out her phone and ordered an Uber to take them to the nearest In'N Out. They arrived at the burger place and got in line.

"I've never seen a line like this at a fast food restaurant," Greg said as they stood at the back of a line of at least thirty people.

"I don't think I've ever seen an In'N Out without a line. It's just that popular. The line will move pretty quickly and I figured we could take our food to go? Have you been to the Griffith Observatory? It's the best place to see the city at night."

"That's the place where Arnold Schwarzenegger appears in Terminator, right?"

Laura laughed, "Yeah, exactly! Are you a Terminator fan?"

"I don't know any man who lived through the 80s who isn't...'Fuck you, Asshole'."

"Come with me if you want to live," Laura replied and they both chuckled.

They stood silently for an awkward moment or two.

"I don't suppose you were alive in the 80s?" Greg finally said.

"Um, no. I was not," Laura admitted.

"Nothing like having dinner with someone born in the 90s to make you feel old."

Laura smiled sheepishly before saying, "But I can promise that this dinner with a millennial won't end with me screaming "Sell me the fucking apples, you dirty, market boy."

Greg's face was pure confusion and Laura instantly backtracked.

"Oh my God. I was quoting your show! Man Down, season 2 when your character goes out with that younger woman."

"Oh of course!" Greg laughed but Laura was mortified and she felt her cheeks going hot and red.

"I'm so sorry, that was totally out of nowhere. I was just trying to be funny, but I should leave that to Morgan!"

"No, that's really something- I'm impressed that you know the show so well. I think it's cute."

Laura was saved from having to say anything as they arrived at the ordering counter.

"What can I get you two?" the young cashier said, wearing the classic paper hat lined with red palm trees.

Laura glanced at Greg. He gestured to her to go ahead, "Please, you're the expert here."

"We will have two Double Double combos with fries-animal style and two chocolate shakes."

"Coming right up!" the cashier said. Laura hurriedly slapped down her credit card on the counter before Greg could even grab his wallet. Having paid, they moved across the room to await their food order.

"You know, I haven't been out with many American women, but you didn't need to pay for my dinner."

"And you didn't need to buy me a designer silk blouse, but here we are."

"Touché," he conceded. Laura pulled out her phone to order another Uber to take them to the observatory and when their number was called they grabbed their paper bag of food and headed off.

Greg made small talk with the driver who had clearly never heard of Greg Davies and told Greg he thought his accent was 'wack.' They arrived at Griffith Observatory to find a decent sized crowd as the building was just about to close, but they found a bench to sit and eat their food.

Greg tore into his burger and Laura waited for his reaction.

"Good?" She asked.

"Very good," he said with his mouth full which made Laura laugh again. They both ate a few bites before Greg spoke again.

"So you've already proven to know Man Down well and I remember Morgan mentioning you've seen all of my work...is that true?"

Laura took a long sip from her chocolate shake while trying to formulate her answer.

"I'm afraid if I answer that truthfully, you will be terrified of me. I know Morgan has some super fans who know her work better than she does sometimes and I may fall in that obsessed category."

"I can tell you, Laura, you are not half as scary as some of the fans that follow me around."

"I suppose that's true. I haven't physically stalked you before," she said with a smile. "I think I have seen everything you've done since you left teaching. I have seen your comedy specials countless times. The Inbetweeners, Cuckoo, and Man Down are on constant repeat on my Netflix account. But my favorite thing to watch is your appearances on TV shows. The Graham Norton Show, Would I Lie to You, 8 of 10 Cats Do Countdown...I mean those bits are your best work."

"Hmmmmm," Greg said, continuing to chew his burger. "I don't think I've gotten that comment before...it's nice to hear you like when I'm being myself."

"And my favorite of all your work is on TaskMaster," Laura added.

"And why is that?"

The corners of Laura's lips curled slightly and had it not been after sunset her slight blush would have been seen yet again. She brought her milkshake to her mouth to hide her coy smile and she shook her head.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I'm not sure I'm ready to admit that yet."

They finished their meal then took a leisurely walk around the observatory grounds taking time to look out all the way across the entire city of Los Angeles. Greg shared some behind the scenes secrets from Laura's favorite episodes and she continued to impress him with her complete knowledge of the series and his work. They found they had quite a bit in common as well such as a preference of dogs over cats, a disgust for most sports, especially football, and a mutual love of the sitcom 'Seinfeld.'

The dry Southern California air did turn a bit chilly on that early March evening and Laura pulled her coat tighter around herself as she pulled up her phone to check the time.

"Oh wow, it's past midnight," she remarked.

"Can I see you back to your hotel?" Greg asked in a very gentlemanly manner.

Laura shook her head, "Oh that's really not necessary. We're staying way down in Anaheim so it's like a forty-five minute drive."

"Well, I'm at Chateau Marmont which is pretty close...if you wanted to go there."

Laura's eyes went wide at the offer.

"Oh, I'm, I don't know-"

"Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that's how you had hoped this date would go," Greg said.

"Date?" Laura exclaimed. "I didn't realize we were on a date."

"Did you not want it to be a date?"

"Of course I did! I just never thought I'd get this far. I mean, you've been my celebrity crush for like six years now and just to meet you was a dream come true. I figured you were hanging out with me as a favor to Morgan or because you still felt bad about spilling your tea on my boobs, but if this is a date, I definitely don't want it to end but I also don't want this amazing memory to be tarnished by a sloppy hook up, and oh God I'm rambling. I ramble when I'm nervous..."