All Comments on 'The Third Time's the Charm'
by StangStar06
- 242 Comments
...actually, this is the first time I gave you less than 4*. What do we have? A mentally retarded whore who finds it okay to let her be fucked by her Ex, Andy, who finds it obviously okay to use his Ex-wife whenever he could, and a grown son who has inherited the single-digit IQ of his parents.
This one called for packback of the worst kind. I doubt anyone would react the way Dale and co did. I believe this one is way of your usual chart. With this story you have left reality and turned pope. Not the StangStar I admire. On the other hand: I have great respect for your trying to walk a different path. But please: Dont continue on this path - that is notz your way, I think.
I couldn't, no, wouldn't, read the rest, but after checking the last page there was no need for a page 2.
A five up until the threesome at the end.
You taking lessons from mikoli??????
3
Contrary to what some of the comments are, this may be one of the better stories you have ever released. True to form, your Mustangs presented themselves in good stead but the rest of the tale was spun with great thought and character build up. While not a BTB story line, retribution did come but not quite in the manner I expected. Also, the ending was a bit of a tease. I gotta see what you do with that one.
Always looking for more of your work. Thank you so much.
The Fuddpucker
More is not better. These characters can't support 4 pages, let alone 14.
Hey Stang,
I rarely feel motivated to leave a comment, however, I feel one is warranted here. I believe there is something missing, a hole in your story. I want you to know first of all that overall this is a solid great story. Perhaps the missing part is why your fans feel this is not your best. We kinda knew Shannon would at some point be intimate with Dale, that was a given so I personal can give or take the lurid sex story of them. I like the addition of Maggie. She completed Dale's story and showed him moving on with life as it should be. I also like that you took a new angle on a loving wife story by focusing on the effects on the people outside of the relationship and the changing emotions. I think the hole is both in Brenda's character and the ending. I find it hard to describe. And the ending felt empty. It honestly left me feeling nothing. I should have felt happy for Dale and his family, but I wasn't. I should have pitied and felt bad for Brenda and the tragedy of her life, but i didn't. Honestly I think the story did not get me emotionally invested in Dale after the initial conflict and Brenda just disgusted me. Anyway I just fought you should know and I think this is a 4 star effort, but not as good as your usual 5 star offerings.
You had me until you went off on a tangent and he started to have sex with his daughter and a threesomes; at least Brenda got what she deserved at the end but overall you ruined it; very disappointed. I think somewhere during the writing of this story it was you who had the stroke for that's the only possible explanation for the turn and direction this story took. Hopefully you will be rehabilitated I and subject us to anymore writings like this; because you are a very good storyteller but this wasn't one of them.
but it still swings over the same deep, dark chasm, TK U MLJ LV NV
As a big Stang fan, I was really disappointed in the incest angle. You emphasize throughout that Shannon was seen by him as his daughter, and that he is a moral, upstanding guy. Sleeping with her violates everything you tried to build into his character. Disappointed in you.
I was bothered by
1. the pseudo-incest; she was not his biological daughter so technically not incest
2. Brenda's punishment was excessive
3. Brenda revelations indicate a broken person.
Too often your "loving wife" is psychologically broken or guilty of a single indiscretion but the husband goes ape shit, the wife is destroyed and then he goes off to a perfect life. I love a good btb story but in yours I sympathize with the wife too much. I'm getting to the point where I start fantasizing the "hero's" mustang gets totaled by the first wife because that's where his true heart is and would justify his actions more than her affair.
I liked the complexity and resolutions. I have become confident that you won't leave storylines hanging and that there is always a cleverness to the solutions. Thanks for another story very worth reading.
..when you see a 'Stang story.
Fine tale, lots of character development. Well done
The names are different but the plot never changes.....oh well.
Another trash story from StangStar06. Always the same, too long and total trash. Only the names change and it is the same shit. Why don`t you get a job and stop with this shit.
I usually like your tales - they may not make total sense but are a good read.
This one I just felt tired after reading it. It wasn't the length, but rather the lack of what I felt was the "emotional involvement" of the story.
Technically good, emotionally a miss.
...just goes to show how important it is to read the w h o l e story before judging..The final two pages really did it for me..Wonderful story - and of course worth a lot more that 3 or 4 Stars. Sorry, SS06, for my rash judgement earlier on.
As usual, I look forward to reading your stories. A lot of people can relate to them. The only complaint I have is that your stories do not come out often enough. I personally look forward to reading a new one every week if that were possible. Keep up the excellent writing.
This is almost paint by numbers for you now.
The husband is so wonderful, we all just adore him. The wife is a complete idiot who cheats in spite of worshipping the ground he waks on. Every other female character is just there to admire and/or guard dog protagonist. Did I mention how much we just adore this guy? Everyone in the story knows that he is too good for her, and even he makes little comments indicating that he thinks this is so. Gosh, what a swell dude.
Congrats. You always manage to make protagonists I actually want to see cheated on.
...right about the time when Shannon got a study partner named Judy Jetson. Figured George, Jane, Elroy and Astro would be making an appearance sooner or later, which would only make sense as this story got lost in deep space pretty quickly. And adding in a quasi-incestuous love triangle did nothing to help resuscitate this story. Sorry, but this one was pronounced dead at the scene. 1*
Not up to your usual standards Stang, story seemed to drag a bit especially at the end, which also took a turn for the surreal. Thought we were going to get some humour interjected with the introduction of Judy Jetson, but no more to follow (I love some of your character names, often with a good laugh). Hope the next one's better and you don't make us wait so long! Otherwise keep up the good work. Sorry only 3* for this one, usually I give you 5!
For supposedly being an intelligent engineer, you made Dale out to be a stupid blind ass. How did you keep him from STDs if Brenda screwed everything with a cock? Cheers!
Yes, the story was long, but that's half the fun. You do such a great job of fleshing out these people it is always a great read. Thanks!
Not up to your usual standards, both storywise as spelling wise. Too many sloppy editing for the usual SS06 standard, for instance the use of wrong names. A story which was a real dissapointment.
Okay, let's put aside for a moment that Stang here can't write different stories, that it's the same couple over and over and over again.
Let's put aside the rampant misogyny he clearly has for a second, and his awful attitudes about rape.
Let's put aside that this was somehow fourteen god damned pages long when it was clear that it could have ended on about page three or four.
And let's put aside that it's continually baffling that he chooses to write female characters when he clearly has so little respect for women that he thinks they think this way.
Dude, if you want to bang your daughter this badly, just go write some incest stories about her and stop pretending with these samey 'oh, but she's not his biological daughter so it's okay' stories you post in Loving Wives for some reason. Or do you think that maybe the incest crowd will be less forgiving of your bitterness and your obvious anger towards women and the fact that you haven't written an original story in years.
Damn, I said I was going to put those aside, guess I can't. You read a StangStar story, you get smacked in the face with misogyny, rape apologism, and the same exact story again and again. The desire to fuck his own daughter only shows up some of the time.
Over the top, and funny. A Stangstar trademark! I'm not sure why youregetting complaints, but i personally likethe humor, even the situational humor of your over the top characters ( the too good to be true guy, the dumb as nails woman, etc). People can be too serious sometimes.
I liked the writing and the characters.
I liked the plot about a husband who thought he had lost everything twisting to be a story about a cheating wife who lost everything.
The usual bizarre plot devices: long term slut wife who can't help herself, making excuses and living in denial. Otherwise is appears to be completely normal?
A saintly, clueless but otherwise intelligent husband who never suspects a thing from his stupid cheating slut wife?
These contrivances are common and long in the tooth. The writing and the characters made this story. SS06 is one of the few writers that can write a long story that I can't stop reading until I am done. The ending was a bright spot in this story, only because while it was over the top, it had the ring of truth to what happens to people who screw their lives up and what happens to people who make an effort to do the right thing. SS06's stories are very visual, I could see them as films.
You have reached out into a new venue with this story. The characters are vivid, the story is compelling, and the resolution is fulfilling.
You are in the pantheon.
very well written story. goes through all of the emotions of a failing marriage and the effect it has on kids which can last years on them. keep on writing
You have written umpteen of these stories and it still amazes me that everyone of them is different. I've read your whole catelog except for the one about the climbing family where the mom fucks the son, didn't read all of it but man the majority are light hearted romps that are archetypal: man gets hosed by wife and comes up with a BBD in the long run. To have written this scenario so many different ways is genius level man I'm telling you; no small feat. Please continue and if you ever switch website let us know, I'll follow you there. Have a great day, year, and football season. ROLL TIDE.
Maybe not the very best but very near and very enjoyable. Who was married to whom got mixed a couple of times. English weights; 14 pounds in a stone, 8 stones in a hundredweight and 20 hundredweights in a ton, simple. Let the French try to better that with their metric system!
An interesting thing that has been bumping around in my head since I finished this story some hours ago. The whole raising another guy's kids - no genetic legacy - and apples not falling far from the tree thing! These may have been his "kids" but they were not his progeny. If his wife was the mentally ill dope that she was portrayed to be and the biological father was the near idiot, degenerate criminal, alcoholic, wife beater that he was portrayed to be - then how'd the kids escape their genetic destiny? A step dad can be a great guy, but unless he is a genetic engineer the apples usually do not fall far from the tree! This is bothering me because the older I get the more "breeding" is apparent to me as I watch the generations come and go. Still like the story.
If this story is written tongue-in-cheek, it does not work. It is not funny in anyway; Brenda is just pitiful and Dale is a moron for loving her. The secondary characters are just ridiculous. However, I still give you two stars because I did finish reading the story and you are a good enough writer that I was invested in the outcome of the whole drama lama.
I like the Mustang but I think I am going of a Hellcat for my "bucket car." Maybe you can work one into a future story?
was just thinking i must have missed a story.
great work as usual. i always look forward to the next offering.
Best success,
RA
It was a real strong story. The ending was a nice surprise. Good to she was not the "most beautiful woman in the world, tho she still could wrong her husband at the drop of a hat.
Pretty much describes this story. In fact, that pretty much describes all your stories since hooking up with Barneyr. All of his stories on that other site are filled with wimpy cucks. My advice, flush the turd that is Barneyr.
I always look forward to your stories and enjoyed the hell out of this one until the last paragraph completely and utterly ruined it beyond all repair.
Incest ?
Really?
Your female protagonists are always stupid, arrogant and self absorbed. That usually works to help buy compassion for the male counterpart. In this story you've outdone yourself on the pretentious character of the wife/ex-wife, however, I am not quite finished and I'm so disgusted with the children's, and even Dale's, behavior that I actually feel sorry for Brenda. Brenda is a moron and had several chances to do the right thing and, as usual, cannot control her actions. But Shannon is a real cunt. It's not going to happen but she has some real karma coming her way.
I felt like this was the turning point in my opinion of the "family" (yeah right, family), "...I was surprised to come home one afternoon and find everything I had ever left them had been left for me, unopened, with the manager of my new apartment building..." That was cold. It's funny how you've taken both biological parents out of the equation and provided surrogate parents for adult children.
Maybe you are exploring the environmental influence as opposed to behavioral or inherited influences. Don't see how this is coming off. The kids seem to be nothing more than fair weather family and I wouldn't trust them any further than they feel they can trust Brenda. Not a fan of this one. Looking forward to the next.
The estimates I have seen suggest nurture accounts for half of a personality, but these children were not newborns when super-dad came onto the scene.
"At fourteen, eleven, and nine years old, they were old enough to remember their biological father."
Old enough to remember is old enough to be influenced by.
Finished reading (sort of) and nothing changed my opinion of the characters. Shannon is still one of the most heinous characters I've read about on lit, her diatribe did nothing to alleviate that by the time it came. Nothing more poignant than this, "...Shannon thinks it's a hoot..." The fact she is now living in her "parents" bedroom and no one thinks its wrong shows exactly which character in this story was really and truly the tragic hero. Frankly, Dale is a putz.
"no one was overly shocked when Shannon moved down the hall and into our room, but that's another story."
That is truly TWISTED.
although this is well written the writer has created a simply stupid character in Brenda, I have met some real sluts in my time but none compare to this character in having no self respect or shame so I find the story unbelievable. T
1. A handsome, clean cut, hard working man who owns a Mustang, meets a plain jane girl who is dumber than a box of rocks.
2. She cheats on Mustang boy with a dirt ball who drives something else.
3. He finds out about cheating plain jane and hooks up with a super model.
4. Plain jane is devastated and Mustang boy and super model live happily ever after.
That about covers it. StangStar can write and can do a good job at it, however, he appears to be stuck in a rutt. Change it up. The good guy doesn't always have to win. There are a thousand ways to take your stories. The end shouldn't be predictable.
Shannon had too much say so in Dale's life. He needed her comfort here and there but she was acting like his spokesperson. She isn't going to ever have a life of her own because she is always trying to protect Dale.
With all that happened in Brenda and the kids' lives, they should've seeked some therapy long ago.
It would be logical if Shannon and Maggie shared Dale, that way Dale could have children of his own.
A long read but a good read.
Thanks for the story..
good writer stuck in the same old plot, shame you can not find more original themes,
I'm on Page 7, where she and Dale are going on their "date", and here she is, lying through her teeth:
"No one else," I said softly. "I already told you that Andy was a mistake and I haven't been with anyone else since then. The thought of doing anything with anyone except you turns my stomach."
Uh, what about Laundry Room Guy and Maintenance Guy? The last we saw she was still doing them, and even if she HAS stopped without telling us, she certainly HAS been with "someone" since Dale!
Now, okay, they're divorced, she can fuck anyone she wants, but if she can'e be HONEST with Dale, what hope can there be for a reconciliation?
Once again you've outdone yourself. Hope to see another one soon. BH7
Didn't see it, unless you were referring to Brenda's stroke psychosis.
Would love to read the story of Shannon's move to Dale and Maggie's bedroom!
Main quibble? Two of the main characters are stereotypes. Sweetie and her Ex are totally self-centered assholes. It is hard to see (nor did SS06 really explain) what Hubby saw in her in the first place. The extent of her shallowness was saved for the last page when Good Daughter said Sweetie never went to her softball games or plays! Hubby HAD to have seen that selfishness by their second date. SS needed to either make her a little more maternally involved OR mentioned that Sweetie had a snapping pussy that a Great White would have been proud of!
Some really hilarious segments ... they saved the 5* that the WAY overlong preachiness of the tale was threatening to sink.
I thought you were a car guy. Pumping the pedal on a fuel injected engine does nothing. Turn the key to run and let the pump prime the line than start it without touching the pedal. Also Ford makes the F150 not Dodge. Story was ok.
I think the most shocking thing about the story is a number of people think this is really a good story. I don't think I've ever seen a story from this particular author THIS the god almighty FUCKING terrible. Each new story from SS06 is a huge step down into the toilet bowl
The analogy or similarities between this particular increasingly said and wretched loser of an author and Matt Moreau is actually quite close on several different levels. As we all know by now ALL of MM the are exactly the same.... The same character .,,, the same plots... same the small weak men under 5 " 8" inches tall with tiny tiny dicks. With SS06... we see the exact same tendencies. The absolutely no growth whatsoever from this particular writer.
The analogy is even more perfect when one considers the fact MM is actually a skilled writer in the technical sense as is SS06. But neither of them EVER show any growth.
Another very similar characteristic between two of these mentally disturbed disappointing and uninspiring writers.... is the overpowering theme that the constant abuse that these husbands take from these terrible woman in these awful marriages is somehow a sign of strength or fortitude or integrity
IS DALE A STRONG MAN ?... No he isnt. CONSIDER
FIRST ... The only way his relationship with Brenda ever comes to and end is when she had a stroke !!! Even in the final scene in the emergency room there is Dale once again RATIONALLY explaining to a mentally ill women why their marriage is over and why it failed.
SECOND... the fact that Dale would even marry a woman that had 3 kids with an psychopath like Andy SHOULD of been a warning flag to stay away.
THIRD... CLICHÉ OF KIDS SAVING THE FATHER/ HUSBAND . Can we finally stop this over used and totally unrealistic cliché where they grown up kids end up saving the emotional and mental state state of the destroy the husband? I am not exactly sure where this overuse cliché began in the LW at genre but it needs to stop . I guess all these bankrupt authors use this tactic or plot device to show that the husband is a sensitive kind caring soul.
STOP DOING THIS !!
It does NOT work. It is totally unrealistic and is extremely annoying. Why don't these grownup men / husbands say to the children... "Shut the fuck up... you my Kids and NOT my wife or mother ...
FOUR... at no point in this story does dale ever say ...or even consider for one second that BRENDA is EVIL; or disturbed or just all around BAD person. ON page 10
"Lauren, it takes all kinds of people to make a world. No one is better than anyone else. We're all just products of the decisions we make and what life offers us,
This is just wrong on so many levels. What makes people good or bad is what they DO .. how they act the words they use.. they things they value. Yet according to Dale (and SS06) these mysterious " decision" are made for us by some sort of wired alien forces that we cant explain.
the implication is clear ... that dale and SS06 think that after all Brenda has done that it is still WRONG to JUDGE someone .
To read about interesting plot, characters mean such stories, where the good husband finds a better second-third wife instead of the cheater ex(es) and he had a good redistribution too. The sad lonely exhusband stories are tiresome and BORING. However SS06 should increase the IQ level of the cheating wife.
I do not see what is new in this tale. It is same one you have done before, only the wife is stupider in the beginning and becomes a raving maniac at the end. No fun and practically nothing notable unless you consider asshole taking her down any place or time. I could see the same characters and no path..
Why don't you shut the fuck up and just comment on things you have some experience in like getting your fudge packed?
One of my pet peeves is the use of characters so fucking stupid it hurts in order to make a pathetic plot work. Well, this one took the cake! And when I got to page ten, I read the STUPIDEST statement I've ever read! I even wrote it down to make sure I could comment on it without having to search for it. Yep, I had steam coming out my ears as I read "No one is better than anyone else." I was shocked to realize that Dale was no better than Andy; Maggie was no better than Brenda; the Bulldogs are no better than the Gators; I mean, my world is crumbling down all around me! Well, actually I didn't believe it for a second. Seriously though, that statement is the biggest insult to anyone who has ever tried and strived to improve his life and the world around him I've ever read.
Just write that other story about Shannon's move to ... The story is wxritten very well like we are used to from you.
Not a bad story, but this plot has been done to death. Saintly husband, narcissistic wife, martyr to a fault, big breasted rebound girl. Everybody goes home happy except for the cheating whore who had no excuse other than "It's just sex.".
No offense, but I have to only give this story a 3. The writing was good, but it is JUST like this author's other stories.
I find it hard to feel sympathy for Brenda because not only does she refuse to take responsibility for her actions, she doesn't even seem to think that she has done anything wrong.
The ONLY slack I will cut her is that she should have been told about Dale and Maggie's marriage before Lauren's wedding. To have that bomb dropped on her while she is already feeling crushed at being left out of the wedding was unnecessarily cruel.
While there is a sort of "emotional incest", and there is a hint of physical "incest" upcoming, there is NO incest in this story!
Even forgetting that Shannon isn't blood, in THIS story they do not have sex, therefore they do not comm it incest.
THIS WAS ABSOLUTELY AWFUL...One Star is too generous!
It rang loudly of a weak husband unable to man up and stick to his guns.
I've copied the other 13 into Word so I can read them along as I can, since it is so long.
I really like these kind of stories. The cheating wife, the husband walks in and catches them, he throws them out of the house buck naked at gun point, the anniversary flowers and cruise tickets in the back seat. It looks like it will be a good read. Just catching a bit at the end of pg 13 in copying and pasting into Word, I see that Brenda and Dale are separated but I made myself not see anything of page 14. I'll save my star vote until I finish, but so far it looks like a 5. It looks like a real BTB story. I'll add comments when I finish.
WAYYYYY TOOO LONGGGG.
This could have been done in a third of the length and not missed anything important. Too much of it was padding and did not move the actual story along. I know that SS07 has become kind of a celebrity here and that is cool. But that doesn't improve the submission.
Here I am just speaking of the technical side of things The idea of the story was OK but the actual execution left a lot to be desired. Too much description and not enough dialog to move the story forward. And the emotional incest was a bit over the top.
And this dragged on for , what?, 14 pages??!!
Sorry,not one of your best offerings.
Regards
C
Stang tells the same story over and over. He does change the names and even the genre, but not the plot. The first wife is chunky and stupid. The second one is a slim, big titted fox. Fill in the ten million blanks and you have a stang story.
God, I get it! Brenda and Andy are White Trash. Dale is a sap who falls for Brenda in the first place. Then, after all the nasty manipulative stuff she tries to pull, he falls for her again. Gack!!! FOURTEEN pages of rinse and repeat. I guess it is morosely interesting that B&A can be so tenaciously self centered, stupid, and lowest class. I guess it's kind of neat that Dale ends up with the family. If you like wallowing in the gutter sex, I guess it could be interesting. It was a story that could have been told in 4 pages and even that really wouldn't have been very interesting.
This one was WAY too long for LW. It should have been in Novels and Novellas for being this long! 14 pages of repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat.
Great writing as usual, but you shouldn't have to waste 14 pages' worth of words when 7 or 8 would have sufficed. Yeah, this could have been written in half the space.
4 Stars. Not often that I don't give a Stang tale a 5, but this just got tedious.
... Try reading some of DanielQSteele1's stuff. "When We Were Married" was in LW and it makes this story look like a postcard.
I have been wracking my brain in an attempt to find out how you are able to be as productive as Isaac Asimov while still retaining such high quality of writing. But I finally figured it out. The "06" in your nick means that you are actually a writers collective of six individuals, probably members of the same Mustang club. Consider yourself busted.
StangStar06..what has happened to you. A year or two ago your stories started going "south," and they are continuing that way. Now they have gotten plain "stupid" and trying to disguise that they are "stupid" by making they long just doesn't "cut" it.
You need to go back to square one and "reboot."
Watching the B slowly roast while she turns her own spit herself is also a hoot.
Dale's the kind of stand up guy who never compromises his morals. He would undoubtedly have wanted to adopt Brenda's kids when he married her, and even though Shannon isn't his biological daughter, there's no way he'd EVER let himself consider her sexually once she was his daughter in the eyes of the law. So if you go that route, be sure to explain how no adoption ever happened.
I'm giving your story 5* because you write so damn well. The ending was a bit too weird for me but that was your choice as the author. I'd love it if you continues their story.
Gave u a 5 because u wrote and posted it. Something was missing from the story...maybe not enough tension ....and a long story needs lots of tension/conflict to keep my interest. I kept waiting for something to happen..and when it did the resolution was disappointing. The Mustang gimmic was even weak...not as funny. I like your stuff but this one left me wanting.
Thanks for all the good entertaining reads.
Why does the bad guy have to be a loser when attributes like the ability to make money and good moral character are very highly valued according to the tone of the story. You would think the the wife to seek those traits too in her potential life mate so she's wouldn't end up with her first loser ex-husband in the first place. If she is going to cheat with someone, it would probably with someone who has more money and moral fiber than her husband, because those traits are so obviously highly prized. Making the wife a slut valuing "chemistry" over finance and morality is inconsistent with the flow of logic. The inconsistency is so glaring that that the story reads like a fairy tale, where all of the good guys are heroic and bad guys are immoral losers. Children don't question inconsistencies but adults do.
As someone who used to look forward to those Thursday mornings when your stories would post and 4 out of 5 times end up late for work. I can't say how disappointed I am in your inability to stop telling the same story. 14 pages of the same shit with different names and year mustangs.
Come on man your better then this!
Thanks for the story. I really like the economic use of characters. This is the 3rd or 4th time using Brenda,right? Not the name , I mean the same character in different stories. Hmmm, maybe not, lol.
AMerryMan
5 stars from me. There were more mechanical errors than I would expect from SS06. Using a spell-checker would have fixed many of the problems, but this story also needed an editor.
Absolutely one of the most entertaining stories I've read here. Sure, a little long, but well worth the time invested. I kept hoping for sloppy seconds or cream pies, which didn't happen in this story, but I really enjoyed the read. This story has it all; Joy, Tears, Laughter, Anger, etc.. While not my favorite MFM adventure, the ending looks like there may be some fun perversion in an upcoming tale. I'll be sending the link to this, could be a movie, drama to my friends.
This is the first of your stories I've read, but I assure you it won't be the last. I also read the comments before scoring or commenting, and to be truthful, I didn't see things like your critics. The let's cut their balls off and kill'em LW crowd are still in their "take no prisoners mode." Since that is the way they look at the world I would expect nothing else from them. I am a bit bothered by the comments from some of the really good writers and/or people who usually write well thought out comments. Maybe when I read some of your other stories I'll understand.
I did see some of the small errors that others mentioned you should have caught, but I think they are all wet about your characters. I know people in real life who could have been models for your story, not one person with all the characteristics, but different people who lived through several of these roles. Yes Virgina, there are some good men like Dale who damn sure couldn't be called wimps--at least not twice by the same set of teeth.
Okay, I gave you 5 stars even though I did think it was too long. 5 stars because I can't think of a way to shorten it without hurting the story.
GOOD LUCK!! Dreamer
Why is it that authors who write for this genre, have so much endless hatred toward biological fathers? I get sick of hearing the 'sperm donor' comment from the same protagonist who steps into a situation with the same horribly depicted deadbeat dad. It's 'white knighting' to a nauseating extent. These characters have all been re-used too many times
The disappointment stems from the fact that you are my favored author and I felt you incapable of producing such drivel . I know,you can't be perfect all of the time. 2* for this.
After ALL THAT, your final line is a tease about the daughter sleeping with her step-father? Please!