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Click hereThough I bristled a bit at the inaccurate impression, it was well done and funny, anyway. I laughed genuinely and smiled at her.
"If I'd left it up to you," she continued, "we'd both be heading home tomorrow frustrated and wondering what could have been."
"Touche," I said. "Thanks for saving me from making such a bad decision." I said it in a joking tone, but was only being marginally sarcastic.
She pursed her lips and squinted her eyes, pretending to be upset with me. "At least you're appropriately thankful. I guess you're forgiven," she said, her face shifting back into a smile. "You ready for bed, handsome man?"
I nodded affirmatively and we reluctantly split apart. She headed into the restroom without a word and I waited my turn, leaning against a wall and nearly dozing off.
She giggled when she came back out and noticed my posture. "Hang in there Jason. I know it's late for someone your age. Just try to keep your eyes open 'til you get to the bed," she taunted, her teeth gleaming as she smiled broadly.
I smiled and flipped her the bird over my shoulder as I headed into the bathroom, eliciting an appreciative laugh from her.
After peeing and rinsing off my equipment, I emerged from the bathroom to find the room completely dark. I couldn't tell where she was and suddenly felt a flash of the discomfort and uncertainty I had felt earlier in the night. Even if I could figure out which bed she had chosen, it wasn't clear whether I should join her or grab the other one. I would have been happy with either arrangement, but I didn't want to make the wrong assumption and put an awkward cap on a great night. Luckily, she saved me the trouble of figuring it out.
"Hey big spoon," she said, from the direction of the far bed (the one we hadn't drenched with our body fluids). "The little spoon's waiting to be snuggled over here."
I made my way to the bed, where I found her curled up on her side under the sheet. Crawling in with her, I assumed my position behind her with my soft dick tucked between her butt cheeks. She pulled my arm around her and positioned it with the hand cupping her breast. My head tucked in right behind hers on the pillow.
"Goodnight Jason," she whispered.
"Goodnight Emily," I replied, feeling comfortable and satisfied.
It wasn't long before her breathing changed and I could tell she was asleep. I must not have been far behind her because that was about the last thing I remembered before darkness closed in.
***
I awoke to streams of sunlight cascading through the window curtains. We had both slept so soundly that our positions had hardly changed during the night. As the cobwebs in my head cleared, it occurred to me that I hadn't thought to set an alarm before going to sleep. The bus that would take us to our campground was to leave at 9:30 and I wasn't sure there would be another if we missed it.
I carefully leaned across Emily, who was still fast asleep, and caught a glimpse of my phone on the nightstand. The screen showed the time to be five after nine, significantly later than I normally slept, but plenty early enough for us to catch our bus. I relaxed back into my sleeping position, relieved and disappointed all at once. Though we hadn't missed our ride, our time alone together was at an end. We needed to get dressed and on our way.
Before making any effort to wake her, I remained alongside Emily for a moment, replaying the previous day in my mind. I had thoroughly enjoyed my time with her and had no regrets, other than that it had to end. Neither a good night's sleep, nor a return to full sobriety had changed my opinion about any of that. I hoped she would feel the same.
Though we had consumed a lot of beer the previous day, I didn't feel like it had affected either of us too significantly. Even so, the prospect of her waking up with regrets, or at least having a changed demeanor toward me, wasn't hard to picture. A veteran one night stand participant in my youth, I had experienced my share of changed attitudes the morning after. However she was going to be when she woke, though, waiting any longer to wake her wouldn't improve anything. With that in mind, I whispered her name in her ear until she stirred.
Her head slowly turned toward me. With her eyes still closed, she asked, "how much time do we have?"
"The bus leaves in about twenty minutes," I replied.
Her face contorted into a frown, her eyes opening and sleepily focusing on me. "I was afraid you would say that," she said. Sliding out from underneath the sheet, she stood in one fluid motion. "We'd better get dressed then."
Emily collected her clothes from the air conditioner vent and went into the bathroom. Grabbing my trunks, t-shirt, and hat, I dressed in seconds and sat down to wait for her. I wasn't at all sure what to make of her quick exit, but definitely didn't feel great about it. Disappointment and concern were having their way with me as I stared blankly at the wall.
The bathroom door swung open after a couple of minutes. Emily emerged with her hair groomed into a thick, flowing mane, looking good as ever. She was wearing her jean shorts and in the process of putting on her bikini top. Her method for applying the top was the maneuver women do where they put it on backward and clasp it before shifting it around the right way. Just as she hooked the clasp, she looked up and our eyes met. My face must have given away my souring disposition, because she stopped what she was doing and gave me an understanding smile. Her smile then turned pensive as she scanned the room before appearing to settle on an idea.
Obviously energized, she unclasped the bikini top, tossing it on the bed, and grabbed my phone. She skipped over to me with a bounce in her step, breasts jostling about, handed the phone to me, and snatched my ragged MP hat off my head. Then, dashing over by the door, she put my hat on her head and faced me as if to strike a pose.
"Do you want a picture to remember me by?" she asked. The question was purely rhetorical. Of course I wanted one.
She put her hands on her hips, her thumbs through the belt loops on her shorts. One leg was cocked out to the side with the knee bent, and the other leg was kept straight, which seemed like some kind of cheerleading pose to me. Her face wore her signature grin, teeth gleaming and blue eyes twinkling beneath the brim of my MP hat. Her chest was pushed forward, breasts looking perkier than ever, her nipples slightly upturned like the main guns of a battleship on parade. She was correct that it would be a picture to remember.
I aimed and snapped, then checked the result for quality. It was a perfect capture, and luckily so, because Emily had already broken her pose and come over to see for herself. She gazed at the image for a bit, then flashed a prideful smile, satisfied with the outcome.
Switching to serious mode for a moment, she said, "that's for your eyes, only."
"Of course," I said, closing the photo screen and putting the phone in my pocket.
Resuming her energetic pace, she flew across the room, snapped up her own phone, and returned to my side. "Now one for me," she said, placing my hat on my head backward in my preferred style and readying her camera. She threw one arm around my neck and shoulder, pulled me toward her until we were cheek to cheek, and snapped several selfies with her other arm extended.
A quick scan of the results revealed some keepers and some blurry ones. We both wore cheesy grins, but looked genuinely happy. Most were just headshots, though a single boob made into the frame of one shot. Even in the others, it was apparent that she was shirtless. I was surprised that we didn't look as much like a mismatched couple as I would have expected. Pleased with the photo haul, she closed down the screen and put her phone away.
With no time to waste, we policed up our stuff, I quickly used the restroom, and Emily put her bikini top on. We headed outside, locked the cabin behind us, and stepped off toward the bus area, me carrying the cooler and her the dry bag as before. It was a clear, sunny day and the temperature was already fairly high as we trudged down the gravel lane.
The impromptu photo session had done wonders for my mood. More because it erased my concerns about how Emily felt than because of the photo itself, though I definitely didn't mind having the keepsake. I remained disappointed that it was time to leave, but I could live with our time ending so long as it ended well. It struck me as no small sign of how much I liked Emily that I worried so much about where I stood with her. I wasn't the kind of guy who spent much of his life worrying about what various women thought of him.
We walked and talked and made fun of a few people we passed at campsites along the way. By the time we reached the bus loading area, we were giggling like a couple of schoolgirls about an insulting joke she had whispered in my ear regarding a large, hairy, camper we had seen. She made a well-played sasquatch reference that had me rolling. We laughed so hard that we leaned on each other for balance. Our foreheads touched for a moment as our laughter petered out.
We got a couple of odd looks from people hanging out in the area of the campground office and I realized that, unlike when we had come through there the day before, we were acting like a couple. I made a mental note to be careful about that when we got back to our campground. We hadn't discussed it, but I assumed it went without saying that neither of us wanted anyone in our group to know (or even suspect) what we had done together.
I turned in the cabin key, we boarded our bus, and we were on our way in no time. There were only about a half dozen others aboard, none of whom appeared to be heading for the same campground as us. Emily and I were silent the whole trip, which lasted maybe twenty minutes. She took one of my hands between both of hers and massaged it during the drive, which felt really nice. I was so relaxed by the time we arrived that I didn't want to get out of my seat.
Arriving at our campground, we unloaded and set out walking again toward our campsite. As familiar tents and my Jeep came into view, I noticed Emily purposely increase the distance between us as we walked. I was glad to see she was as conscious of how we appeared as I was.
We came upon our group as most of them were sitting in camp chairs circling the campfire. A quick assessment told me a few people had left already, there being a couple of empty patches with flattened grass between some of the tents and less than a dozen people around the fire. I dropped the cooler by my tent and grabbed an open chair next to Andy, purposely not concerning myself with what Emily did or where she sat. Lacking any confidence in my ability to interact with her around the others without giving away our secret, I unconsciously chose to affect indifference toward her.
Falling into my chair and feeling several pairs of eyes upon me, I belatedly realized how unprepared I was to face everyone. Never having been any good at lying or acting, I was unlikely to prove up to the task of making up a believable story off the top of my head that would explain our day together without saying too much. I wished we had settled on a narrative when we had time to do so. As it was, I decided my best course was to say as little as possible.
As I had expected, a barrage of questions flew our way while Emily found a seat on the opposite side of the fire from me, near her parents. I let her speak for us and she rewarded me by taking all the blame for us falling behind out on the river. First, she said our pace was slow because she was too lazy to help me row. Then, she gave an entertaining account of our tipping incident, accepting full responsibility for it in the process. Her explanations put a good face on our late completion of the float, I thought. It turned out that nobody else in our party had tipped their canoe all day. That was somewhat rare and, considering that we were already bringing up the rear when it happened to us, seemed to be universally accepted as the reason we never caught up.
Once the general curiosity had been satisfied, the group broke down into multiple, local conversations. Andy and another coworker of similar age, Jake, set about filling me in on all I had missed during the float. As we talked, each of them cast surreptitious glances at Emily from time to time, looking as though he wanted to ask me something afterward. However, no questions about her ever came. Both men's wives were just a few chairs away and well within earshot, which may have accounted for their failure to broach the subject that I knew was on their minds.
At some point while we were talking, I became aware that Emily had left her seat across the fire, though I didn't see where she went. Not long after that, I was startled by hands firmly grasping my shoulders. I spun my head around to find her standing behind my chair, hovering over me with her hands at the base of my neck, those familiar blue eyes staring back at me from above. She had changed into a nondescript t-shirt and shorts. Her hair was back in that high-set ponytail sprouting from atop her head. A pleasant smile adorned her face, perfect teeth shining in their straight rows. "Introduce me to your friends, Jason," she commanded, somewhat playfully.
A wave of concern swept over me at the familiarity that her casual approach to me projected. My head spun a little as I fumbled for the appropriate demeanor to wear in response. I wanted to blunt the raising of eyebrows she might be causing without doing anything she might find off-putting. Before I could assemble a strategy to meet those tricky criteria, though, she put my concerns to rest for me.
Without waiting for me to say something, Emily moved alongside my chair and introduced herself to the guys. In the process, she caught the attention of their wives further down the row of chairs. She smoothly included them in the introductions and was well received by the women. Following a little back and forth, she pulled up a chair of her own at their invitation. We three roosters were all but forgotten after that as the hen talk went on without us.
I sat silently for a few minutes, listening to the nearby conversation. Just as she had with her explanation of our late completion of the float, she put just the right face on our relationship. I thought her commentary and behavior portrayed a lively, platonic friendship between us. In fact, she played things so smoothly and effortlessly that I felt a little foolish for having worried so much about how to be in front of the others. The subject certainly wasn't troubling Emily. She never seemed to run out of new ways to impress me.
Before long, the various conversations around the fire broke up and everyone got down to the business of packing up. I disassembled my tent and loaded my Jeep in thoughtful silence. Already missing Emily, I was having one of those moments when you know things can't be different, but you still have trouble accepting how they are. It wasn't that I had any illusions about the two of us living happily ever after or anything. We didn't fit into each other's worlds. It seemed that we both understood that and I wasn't foolish enough to question it, but I didn't like it, either. I wasn't sure what I would have wanted from her, even if I had been in a position to expect anything at all. All I knew was that I liked her--I liked her a lot--and it was hard to accept that my time with her was over.
My musings were cut short by the need to exchange goodbyes with some of the others who were ready to head out. Because I felt bad about not having spent much time with my coworkers during the weekend, I put extra effort into seeing everyone off. Caught up in a whirlwind of pleasantries, I didn't even notice when Ted, Sharon, and Emily approached me from the side.
They took their turn in what almost amounted to a receiving line beside my Jeep. Ted and Sharon made some brief remarks thanking me for hosting Emily. Then, she stepped up and gave me a quick, chaste hug, followed by a knowing look from those beautiful eyes. I shook Ted's hand and they went on their way. Emily's perfect ass was, fittingly, the last I saw of any of them as she climbed into their SUV.
A half hour later, all my goodbyes complete and my gear loaded, I was behind the wheel and headed home. As my tires crunched gravel and raised dust during the climb out of the river valley, I sorted through memories from the weekend and put my mixed emotions in order. Though our unceremonious parting of ways had been a bit hard for me to swallow, my time with Emily had been nothing short of fantastic. It wasn't impossible that I would be with her again at some point, but I didn't need to believe that it would happen. Any fair evaluation of the situation would have concluded that I was a lucky man for my role in what had already happened. I accepted that reality, settled back in my chair, and reveled in all the pleasant memories.
Bouncing and bumping my way down the familiar path back toward the highway, a smile plastered across my face, I flashed back to my reminiscences from the drive down two days before. My uncanny good fortune in the riverlands had come through for me yet again. I had thought river conquests were a thing of my past, but I was wrong. Not only did I have one more fling in me, but it turned out to be even more fun and more story worthy than all the others. Partly due to the rare quality of my partner and partly due to the implausibility of us winding up together like we did, this trip had surpassed all those that came before it. Despite its unromantic and anticlimactic conclusion, there was no doubt that it had been my best canoe trip.
***
- COMMENTS
This story honestly needs a followup. Some kind of a reunion or something. The imagery, development, story line characters, everything... What a great effort on your part!!
I think you've captivated enough readers to have a following on this one.
A possibility for the next National Nude Day if nothing else.
Wonderful story overall. Excellent writing, natural, character development, and attention to detail. During the sex scenes, I would’ve liked to have had more description of how Jason factually felt rather than just description of the actions and scene; it did not detract from the story, but perhaps lessened the arousal effect a bit. Enjoy your writing, hope to see more.
Only a page or two in, I realized I had read this story some time ago, but lacked the retention of details, which started to hook me in once again. This could use another chapter or two so we can have more interactions of the characters. Perhaps an annual event or other chance meeting along the river in the future?
Just a genuinely great story from start to finish. Both Jason and Emily felt like real people, and ones I’d like to know. Moreso Emily for obvious reasons, great work!
Bummed there’s no sequel to this story. Feels like there’s more to these twos story that’s yet to be written. Maybe as a former cop he does security for an event her college is hosting and they spend another weekend together? Or maybe a couple months later they go on another water adventure?
This story was way too long...It took 8 pages just to get to any action.... I thought it would be good but not.... lost this guy....only three stars
Thank you for taking me on your trip! The canoeing made me think of the Current River in my younger days. The rest of the story was out of my experience until sharing through your storytelling. How awesome!
What a superb read. I felt that I lived the journey and the adventure within it with you.
Wow! Second reading and it was even better this time.. Well written, a beautiful story. I liked Emily, very much actually. She was honest, open, beautiful, a great/mature outlook on life. He was also well grounded and his treatment/actions toward Emily was outstanding/perfect. I would love to see more of these two. While the age difference is a problem, there are many examples of that not hindering a successful relationship.
Thank you!
I loved this story. I could believe everything that happened. It was well written, exciting, and satisfying. I hope to read a sequel one day.
Great story. I've read hundreds but this is the first to draw a written response. I spent many days on the current river in youth. Thanks for the memories and the story.
The best story and best written story here. Thank you. You have a talent. I didn't want it to end.
fun story, thank you. You didn't say which part of government he investigated for. Would it be background security checks? Might they meet again a couple years later, after she graduates and applies for a sensitive government job?
Well done! This needs to be part of a series with several similar events over a period of time. Either planned or unplanned they meet again at a facility to do a canoe trip or maybe even some wilderness camping.
I couldn't put it down. Fine writing, wonderful characters, hot little fantasy, I love it all. Well done. If you haven't tried getting published, you should.
Whilst I appreciate reading your stories for free on Literotica, you have the talent to be a more-widely read, dare I say, mainstream author. If you have not done so already, get published! Please.
I’m lost for words. Never commented on an author or single story but you forced it out of me. This story is worth a read for any literotica reader! The characters were perfectly pictured at least for me, and not too much backstory to lose interest. Excellent build up and character development! I truly hope you continue writing. I’d absolutely love to read more, even if it’s a continuation of Emily or another story altogether.
Keep up the solid solid work!
You, sir have a talent. Utterly believable, completely enjoyable. More, please.
This was an amazing read! Looking forward to more stories (and perhaps even a sequel?)
Great story. I’m 20 years older than my wife so not unbelievable. Sex scenes were tender and passionate. We need a sequel.
This was such a fantastic read!!! I enjoyed every minute of it and couldn’t wait to finish it. I really felt like I had lived the sexy experience. Well done, you hooked me!
Fun, fun story! Normally I don't finish stories this long, but this one kept my interest and hit just the right tone of being tons of fun without being totally unbelievable.
Perfect prose and balanced tension suspending disbelief. So enjoyable.
What did I think of this story? I think it needs a sequel maybe she visits him or he visits her! but something please write more about this couple!
Without a doubt, the best story I've ever read, thrilling, exciting. I'm closely resembling this guy and wish something like this could happen for me making my life exciting again like it used to be. sad to think this was the end for this couple knowing how well they got along together. so much more to say it was just fantastic.
With out a doubt one of the best stories ever, so much reality it was hard to believe it was fiction, or was it? I will certainly be looking for future stories with you as author. Excellent work not enough superlatives to do the work justice.
Absolutely fantastic story!! Well written and just the right tone, hot without coming off as inappropriate in any way. I am pretty sure that I couldn't have managed even the token resistance the character presented. Certainly a bucket-lister for him!! I will look forward to seeing more of the same from you, hopefully in the near future, Nicely done, Bravo!! Write on!!
Best story I’ve read on here. Read it a few times. Please continue their story the people need more!
Add another star for six! Pace, balance, tone are all excellent. Not many stories here merit 11 pages. This one just reads without conscious turn of the pages. It ends with that same sense of disappointing inevitability so that reader shares the emotion of the main character and his viewpoint. WOW! Keep writing, please.
This is a wonderful story - lovely, slow build, sensuous. My unrealistic regret is that they didn't continue the relationship. Please continue writing stories!
I really enjoyed this story. I thought the writing was descriptive and engaging. The fantasy of the story itself was fun and diverting. Thanks for a great read!
Dr beulahthebrit; Please, please, could someone please explain just why after spending three to four years at college (depending on degree) you would waste years of your life by going into the military. If countries wasted less money supporting the military/industrial complex, the world would be a far better place and the trillions of pounds/dollars/euros could help to support the hundreds of millions of people starving on this planet. Oh, no I didn't bother after the army bit, never do.
I hope to read more from you in the future.
Must say this story is a mixed bag, as I share a few reservations of other commenters. I will start with positives, though.
Transitions are smooth and the reading flow is never interrupted at any point. You picture his doubts appropriately and document his internal struggle correctly to reflect what he really wants. She also doesn't come on strongly and comes off naturally in all her interactions. This is far from the instant gratification of some stories...but when it starts sizzling, it hits full boil. Finally, you resolve it reasonably, which stays true to your premise.
The fact she's so mature and open really seems to contradict her being "conservative," since she's clearly very extroverted and truly exhibitionist to a fault. Can she be a cheerleader, be smoking hot and have a brain? Yes. However, what you suggest is that she remembers him far better than he remembers her--and that suggests a huge crush--but you never explain that in the story. And while it's not uncommon for someone to be "conservative" around parents and be quite "relaxed" around friends one can trust, the problem is sooner or later, that "relaxation" ends in getting caught; it's simply a matter of time; in today's world, she would be outed and shamed from those people that took video of her while on the swing, just as soon as they could get to a good wi-fi connection.
Had you been an established author (more than 1 story), I would have rated this a 4, since some of the aforementioned factors could not have escaped even this fantasy world unscathed. However, since it appears this is your first, I rated it a 5, especially for your patience to slow roll the story and develop something between two unlikely partners that in some universes could have happened. Congrats on your award.
Thanks for sharing this fun story. Very well written and just this side of believable. Enjoyed the characters and read it all the way to the end because I cared about how they dealt with the elephant at the end.
Unfortunately, I have a hard time repeating the accolades of other commenters. While an enjoyable story, the credibility was stretched just a bit too thin. A cheerleader who was perfectly content to bare it all, but to get upset when the thoughts of a camera, when cameras were assuredly present, didn't ring true. She's got nipple rings, been active in sex at college, but is "almost" a virgin? Doesn't quite ring true. My take was that this was more of a "Ah, wouldn't it have been grand - if only -" fantasy story. 4 stars (Which is quite good, btw, but as a contest winner, I was disappointed.)
"Any fair evaluation of the situation would have concluded that I was a lucky man for my role in what had already happened. I accepted that reality, settled back in my chair, and reveled in all the pleasant memories."
This hits surprisingly hard.
Fantastic story, a well deserved winner. Would love to read more of your stories. Hope you provide that opportunity. - Vriesea
Honestly I think that this is one of the best erotica stories I've ever read, it was captivating from start to finish, and the character building was out of this world for me. Not to mention the fabulous sex scenes! 10/10. Can't wait for more.
I’ve been reading erotic fiction on sites like here and other places you can read stories online since the late 90s, and this is for sure one of the best I’ve read.
I got so engrossed in the story, I tended in anticipation when she said let’s have sex.
At the end, I felt like I was saying goodbye to summer camp friends.
I eagerly await your next work!
Nice story!
Looking forward to seeing more from you. P.s. This story was quite long - you could have easily broken it up into two r three parts and released them one at a time perhaps. But I realize you may have done that for the contest.
We need story 2 with these characters. Maybe a bit of real public nudity on her part...
Engaging story, nice dialogue, hot sex. A compelling story well told. Bravo!
When the story ended, I almost felt like Jason did, I cant believe it is over. It flowed so smoothly. Your win is well justified. I am anxious to see what else you might have in store for us. Bravo
The only thing that was poor was not cumming insider her the first time so you could taste her. Much better to cum inside her, then taste her after than to act like that's gross -- it's not.
This is a first submission to the site? I look forward to reading a great many more!
Thank you, i hope you do well in the competition. For a new writer that's superb, please write more and possibly a further chapter to this story as keen to know what happens next.
Outstanding writing! I thoroughly enjoyed every page. I could have read a novel like this story. Hope to see more from you in the future. Thank you.
Jason had a weekend he will never forget--perhaps Emily too
Loved the entire story from beginning to end. It's easily worth ten stars.
Good luck in the contest.
What an accomplished story and for your first. 11 pages is long for a competition entry but it certainly flew by and I loved the build up to their sexual encounter. Don't get ne wrong - I prefer longer stories provided they're god and yours did not disappoint. Hope to read more of yours and possibly a continuation of this one???
I had to make an account just to let you know that this story is incredible! I read it in 1 sitting, never did that before with such a long story.
This is one of the best stories that I've ever read on here, and I've been here for many years. I look forward to reading more from you. Thanks for such a thoughtful piece of work!
A brilliant story, so erotic, so sexy. Your two protagonists are drawn with care and affection, and this is now in my keeper stack of excellent short stories. I admire your fine pacing, evocative scenes, elegant sentences, the invisible writer. This story is huge; thank you for a great gift. My handle is WonderWay, not yet moderated.
Brilliant story! I really hope you write more of them in the future! Would love to read about a possible second encounter between Emily and Jason. 5*
Wonderful characterizations. Like Jason, I love a woman who has agency and knows her own desires. The ending made me sad - always a sign of a great love story. I hope to read about their reunion someday!
i agree with all the comments and your excellent character development of both
Bravo! Fantastic story with great characters. Would absolutely love to see this turn into a series. To think of the possiblies of them crossing paths & seeing where the relationship goes...
Loved this one. Some of my favorite stories involve people who enjoy having “mischievous fun” with one another, and this certainly qualifies. Disappointed to find that it’s your first and there were no others to go read, but that just means there’s a future out there! 5 Stars
The story was adequately developed and compelling, but what really stands out, John, is the quality of your writing. In other words, the content was good, but the organization, focus, style, and conventions were great. Your sentence structure is superb and your grammar nearly perfect.
Such a well-constructed and entertaining story. It was long but so well-paced that it ended far too quickly. The characters were so well crafted that you felt you knew them, or at least had known them at one time. Great job and best of luck in the contest.
WOW! Every once in awhile the truly great story in every aspect comes along. Thank you and thanks for giving us so many pages to enjoy!!
You Sir have a talent. Please come up with another or many. I am sure I will enjoy them all. Even a follow-up to Jason and Emily(a rare, intelligent and worthy female could not be pleased with most "boys" her age and should be entitled to an occasional break from her school routines). Please do not keep that talent locked up.
Fantastic! The story line, the stage business, the pacing - When I realized at the bottom of the first page I had 10 to go I gave some thought to skipping ahead - glad I read every page
Question - were they so far out in the boondocks that there was no cell phone service? There was none in "Deliverance" but that was in the bottom of a canyon half a century ago
Simply excellent. Well written, good character development and oozing sexuality - just like Emily. I think it’s time the author gives us some more!
fun story, I enjoyed it. Mike9947 got to you first about canoes and row boats. Paddles for canoes, oars for boats.
Loved the story, I have been on plenty canoe trips in South Missouri and this story brought me back there. The beach parties, the people just as you described them and definitely the rain. The trips where always a blessing or a curse to relationships, driving couples apart or pulling them closer together. Great job!
Really wonderful story...You're going to have an impressive portfolio. I loved how you had mini-stories within the main story. Well worth the long read.
I'd love to see them get together again soon as the characters were on the cusp of realizing they might be soulmates. Nicely done, now hand me a tissue!
For a first story , that was excellent, I look forward to reading more of your output, thanks
Superb storyline, great character development and rising sexual tension. Bravo!
A truly fantastic story, well written, and nicely paced. Thank you for sharing such a wonderful story. BTW, Military Police at Ft. McClellan — that is really dating the old age of this story. I was there for training late ‘77. I hope to see more of your writings.
I’ll have to admit, this is the first 11 page story I’ve ever read on Lit. The story line and content were very good. Great Story.
Holy Toledo. Great stories within the story. Really looking forward to more.
A great first story! Well worth a 5.
It could use a bit of editing. Spelling looked good to me but a bit of awkward grammar now and then. Personally I would have used less backstory in the first pages.
Sex was great. Whole story was fun and funny - but also insightful in examining their different approaches to human sexuality and coming of age,
Big no-no that you will be criticized for is that you don’t know much about canoes - they have their own vocabulary and you got it badly mashed up with row boats,
Very enjoyable.
Such a disappointment… that this was your only posted story! ;-)
Great job! You set the stage perfectly, gave each character distinctly different and consistent personalities, and told a great story with just the right amount of sex and adventures.